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[1993_J]

Hi im writing on here, because I'm new, looking to be honest I know it's about how you look at a situation and most of the time i try be positive but it feels that everyone around me gets so complacent with it and I'm not aloud to be upset or hurt. I'm over welmed with life as I'm going threw a custody battle and my car broke down. Arhh 

[TBR]

HI 1993_J

Reading your post it seems to me that you look at the situation as you see it and try to make the best of things.

To be positive is a great thing compared to being negative, the issue is so many would rather look at the downside of things and get uncaring in the way that they don't consider your feelings. So many are complacent and think that being upset or hurt is a weakness when in fact its a strength to show your human.

Your not alone being over whelmed with events going on and additional things like your car coupled with a custody battle doesn't help with your mood, patience feeling of being alone and over whelmed. 

Your not alone is the first thing you need to realise and there are people to talk to about everyday things that may seem trivial but to you are major events in your life.

It does help talking about things to someone who doesn't know you but can give you a new perspective on what's happening and how to look and maybe deal with things to make you feel better.

Feel free to message back and we can chat.

TBR

[indigo22]

Hi 1993_J,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for reaching out to us.

Trying to be positive about things is a good trait, but there are times when life gets on top of us making it difficult to keep up the positive outlook. You are going through a major life experience at present and, since I have never had children, I can only imagine how hard this is for you. Children are not born to be battled over so I hope this situation is not affecting them too deeply.

You mention that you are not allowed to be upset or hurt, but according to who? You have every right to own your feelings and express them. In fact, not doing so will cause you more harm in the long term. If you are unable to express your feelings with those around you, you owe it to yourself to find another outlet.

Have you spoken with your GP about what you are going through at the moment? I think it would be wise to do so and find a counsellor to help you through this difficult phase. The other option is to make use of the helplines that are available to everyone. There is also Kid's Helpline if your children are struggling with the situation.

Of course, you can continue this conversation as well and we will be here to support you, however, I think you need more support than just the forums at the moment.

Take care,

indigo22

[indigo22]

Hi 1993_J,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for reaching out to us.

Your positive way of thinking is a good trait, but there are times when life gets on top of us making it hard to maintain that outlook.

You are going through a major life experience at present so it is not surprising you are faltering. I have not had children so I can only imagine how difficult this is for you. Children were not born to be battled over, so I hope they are not being affected too deeply by the situation.

You mention you are not allowed to be upset or hurt. According to who? You have every right to own your feelings and to be able express them the same as any other human being. In fact, burying them and not expressing them will only cause health problems in the long term. If you can't express your feelings to those around you, you owe it to yourself to find an alternative outlet.

There are a couple of options: you can visit your GP and ask for help with counselling support through this difficult time, or you can make use of the helplines that are available to everyone (including you 😉). There is also Kid's Helpline if your children are not coping well with the situation and need to talk it through with someone.

Of course, you are always welcome to continue this conversation and we will be here to support you, however, I feel you are in need of more support than just the forums at present.

As far as the car is concerned, since it has no opinion or feelings, give the tyres a kick and get some of your frustration out of your system. 😉

Take care,

indigo22