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Hiya! i am new to this....

where_is_real_me_
Community Member

I don't know what to do, I'm waiting on a diagnosis or more but feel like I'm wasting away....

I can't do things, I used to and now, my family and friends can't / won't, be able to understand me and what is going on....

So, nearly 25 years of life and been, treated as a "normal person" for 24 of those years, I've had no disability or mental health conditions, yet but my health isn't great, now family or friends thinking I'm doing all this to get attention from anybody but I am not....

I want to know what's gone wrong, I don't know how to feel, anymore so, and that's why I'm getting help but I hate, that my mind, body and soul is attacking me, every day and night, it always draining too, all of the time.

9 Replies 9

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello where_is_real_me, undersand completely what you have told us because sometimes even without a diagnosis, you know that you aren't feeling the way you should be and to try and explain how you feel to anybody is not agreed upon and told we're ridiculous.

People can pretend that they're OK but no one can fully pretend they haven't got depression of any type, well to a certain point this can happen, but then, what about wanting to stay in bed, not eating or crying at anything that moves or not communicating like you were once able to, so you can pretend in certain areas but not to the people you know, signs will show that something isn't right.

Try to write these thoughts down so when you do see your doctor they will understand what you're trying to tell them.

If you can do this in point form and I say this because if it's an essay they seem to get lost in all of it and miss the main points, include any triggers that may be a cause and your reactions to what's happened.

If your health hasn't been good this can lead onto many other issues, especially if no one else has experienced this themselves, like wasting away is a great concern.

We are here for you so please get back when you feel confident enough to trust us.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Hello where_is_real_me,
 
Thank you for finding the strength to post. We know it takes courage when you are struggling with mental pain and confusion. We hear you saying that this is a big, and quite confusing, change for you to struggle with.
 
We are a friendly, caring, and supportive community
 
We are glad to hear that you are being assessed by mental health professionals. This is good because they have the best chance of helping you better understand what is going on inside.
 
We would encourage you to contact a counsellor. Professional counsellors may be able to help you talk through what is going on inside without judgment.
 
The Beyond Blue Support Service provides 24/7 advice and support via telephone (call 1300 22 4636), webchat and email (email response provided within 24 hours).
 
Welcome to the community.
 
Sophie M.
 
 

therising
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi where_is_real_me?

My heart goes out to you as you face such overwhelming challenges. Can be so hard to make sense of things, especially when we're struggling to find the kind of people who can help us make sense of things. I'm so glad you came here to express yourself freely as well as perhaps looking for ideas on how to make better sense of all that you face right now.

I'm just about to run out the door and wanted to grab onto your post in case I lost it. Will be back asap. Just wanted to put it out there that in the case of figuring out who you naturally are perhaps you could be facing the challenges of letting go of who you're naturally not. Feeling our way out and into our natural self can be one of the most torturous of challenges in life - a process that can start bringing a lot of poop to the surface, raising a lot of questions. It can definitely become an exhausting process.

🙂

HamSolo01
Community Member

Hi there where_is_real_me

I hope you get some answers soon

therising
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi where_is_real_me?

Amazing how people can label us as an 'attention seeker' and simply leave it at that. I think sometimes it can feel like 'Hey, over here! I'm drowning! Yo!!! Can someone please give me some assistance!' and what do they do? Sometimes offer us nothing more than what equates to 'Swim harder' or 'Stop yelling'. In other words, stop being an attention seeker, even though you're looking for the kind of basic attention that leads to what's life saving at times.

So many triggering comments when you're trying to work out what feels like the toughest time in life. Wondering if any of the following sound familiar

  • 'You just need to get on with things.' Btw, this is in no way any solid management plan
  • 'Stop overthinking everything.' Yes, why don't I simply stop trying to work out why I feel so depressed. Hmmm
  • 'You should be grateful for all that you have. You have a good life. Other people have it much worse'. I've rolled 3 of the best into one here
  • 'You're too sensitive. You need to toughen up.' Truly hate this one, with a passion. I'll go down the route of sarcasm again: Yes, I'm very sensitive. I've got an idea, what if I become completely insensitive. What if I just stop sensing everything. Then I'll be numb enough to 'get over everything' and get on with life even though I won't be able to feel life

With that last one, what would it look like if you took it in a completely different direction? What if you became super sensitive. Would you be able to get a better sense of/feel for

  • what words or comments are highly triggering, depressing and/or stressful
  • which people are highly triggering, depressing and/or stressful
  • what no longer excites you
  • when you're not being given inspiration or solid guidance
  • where you're energy levels are at (flat battery or fully charged). Would you be able to get a better sense of who or what is draining you or charging you up?
  • what the most constructive direction feels like
  • when emotional dis-ease (upset) is taking a toll on the body

etc.

Personally, I'm a super sensitive gal, still trying to master getting a feel for things. It's hard work at times. I believe what can often make the work so hard comes down to how we're not taught to trust, question or listen to our 'feelings'. So at the end of the day, with a lack of education, how are we supposed to know what to do based on how we're feeling life through the unique ability known as sensitivity.

Are you waking up to a lot of insensitive people?

thank you, geoff for responding to my post above, means a lot to me.

thanks again, for the advice and I, struggle with a lot especially with wording things, I can type it better than talking because my mind will run ahead of my mouth so I easily, get trip up trying to explain what is going on with me in correct words or terms to these professionals as doctors, psychologist/psychiatrist, and any other professionals too.

thank you, sophie for responding to my post above, means a lot to me and that's good to know, will look more into it so thanks once again.

thank you, hamsolo01 for responding to my post above, means a lot to me.

I am hope for answers too, soon because I'll be more comfortable within myself too.

thank you, therising for responding to my post above, means a lot to me.

I understand what you mean by all of your statements above and that is true for me, to be honest.

I feel like it'll take time too but I've also been feeling like this since august, last year so yeah, it's been a tough time but thanks once again for your input, appreciate it.