Hello there I am Ann.
Welcome and thanks for posting! I'm sorry to hear you're going through such a tough time... However, depression is extremely common and even though it may seem like it will never get better, it is treatable and you will get back the best quality of life possible.
Have you tried talking to close friends or family about this? They can really help a lot and be a great support network for you when you just need that little bit of help. Maybe also try a counsellor, if you feel up to it? They can help you sort through your situation and find ways to cope and feel a lot better. There are also plenty of good counselling services online, such as the chat service here on beyond blue.
dear Ann, hello and thanks for joining the forum.
Turning 61 is the same age as me, and when you try and think back to what we have been through over these years, well I suppose that people being half our age they too would have been so much as well, but with depression no matter what age we are it still lingers on and attaches itself to us, because I don't believe that we can ever get rid of it, sure we maybe able to control it or push it one side, but only when we feel strong enough to do so, but there are times when we just can't do this so once again we fall back into it.
We have to try and prepare ourselves when it may happen again, I know that it's not easy because when it does happen we aren't strong enough to follow through with the plans, so maybe we should make a scale of who to contact, that is if we have just started to fall back then the person who is most important to us then that's who to contact, and when we are our lowest then we need to contact a support phone number.
We all have different scales of whom we should contact, but when it actually happens we don't follow through with these plans, so then we have to make a simple scale rather than a complicated one. Geoff. x