Welcome and Orientation

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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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New Member Introduction

replies: 6

Hi everyoneNew member today.I'm a 43 year old female that has just reached the point in her life where nothing is interesting, no motivation, worn out, and have a mountain of past issues to work through, traumas, emotions, substance abuse, several medical conditions, and ..........Now trying to turn things into the positive, I am seeking all the help and support I can get.I want to live again .

Where to start?

replies: 5

Hi - I've just joined this forum today after searching for counsellors, boards, forums, etc online. I've been married for 30 years, our kids are grown, but 2 still live with us. Simply put, I've had enough. I've had enough of being left to clean up after them all, of always being asked for help, of being ignored, of always being the peace keeper, of being the 'go between', of always putting myself to the back of the pack. My husband works, but has the attitude of 'home is for resting'. He won't help out around the home, and wont do the heavy, outside jobs that are just too much for me. He says he will - but he doesn't. I'm tired of waiting around for months for one simple job to be done. I've hired a gardener and sometimes a handyman to get things done, but we don't have much money so I can't do it all the time. I am very unwell, and I fear that as my illness progresses, I'll have no one to look after me. They really are all that selfish. I need to leave, and I need to get the help that I need going forward. As I'm not working at the moment, where do I start? How can I leave with no home to go to? I don't have any other family - parents passed away and there's no one else. I've applied for jobs and I did have a receptionist job temporarily; but finding work at my age is so difficult! Any suggestions as to where to start?

I have made a mess.

replies: 13

Only joined this forum today as I was searching around for business support. I have made a mess of my business and personal finances and life and don't know how to move myself forward.Can you believe I just wrote my piece and ran out of room just as the current struggle began.In short, I was bullied as a kid for being gay (it was the 90's and we were very rural). I got diagnosed with PTSD, binge eating and Seronegative Arthritis around 30. Accessed some help around that time. Then had a few good years.Currently, I was in the middle of the fires and as a casual nurse was unable to work. My Aunt who has long been a huge support of mine died and I didn't get the chance to grieve her as the pandemic wore on and nurses were really unable to take a step back. I started a side hustle which was one positive thing. The second COVID vaccine exacerbated my arthritis to the point where I was unable to work for 8 weeks then could only go back on reduced hours and not on the floor. My partner was bullied out of a job and now has mental health problems of his own. I was unable to get the medicare exemption for the third vaccine but was medically advised not to have it because of the reaction to the second, so I had to give up my nursing career. I then fell into a pit of despair and had no insight, made some bad decisions around my business and have just been making more of a mess of my life and my business since. I have seen my GP, we started me on antidepressants which are great, but everyday I find something else I messed up and have to add another thing to my list of I need to fix.I have supportive people around and I talk to them but there is just so much I messed up I don't know where to start getting it back on track. I see a psychologist and have an appointment with a financial advisor for my personal finances to run over it all, but what I need is some sort of business coaching to help me get back on my feet and bring my business back, but there seems to be nothing. I am reaching out to any other business owners who have found themselves in this trap and how you dug yourself out keeping your mental health intact. Mine is still on a knifes edge and it could go either way.

Monthly Forums Update: Reflecting Back on 2022

replies: 10

Hey everyone, As 2023 approaches, we'd love to take the time to reflect on the year that was. It's been a big year, throughout which this community made time and held space for openness, vulnerability, kindness and connection. In July, we went live with a new and improved Forums platform. It’s been a huge change, but the most brilliant thing is how this community has supported each other through the changes, sharing tips, feeding back, and helping one another to adjust. Together, you've shared over 44,000 posts and Supported other's posts over 13000 times, showing each other there is always someone here who cares. In 2022, we've also welcomed over 8,500 new members.So we want to end the year with an enormous thank you to everyone reading. To everyone who has started discussions, joined in on word games, kept up with friends, and those just passing through and reading – thank you for making this community what it is. Community Voices: What are people talking about in 2022? How to feel 'connected' without reaching out? Great question, so many great answers. Pets, great tv, online forums like this one are just a few of them... from Willow Jude Beyond Blue's fundraising efforts this year inspired this awesome spot to share your dream dinner party, Big Blue Table Forum Style! Summer Rose started this awesome thread in October to commemorate Mental Health Month. Come and share your best dishes and dream guests. quirkywords asked the Forums What gives you comfort? earlier this year, and there is so much warmth, kindness and comfort on this thread. We'd love to hear which your favourite conversations of 2022 have been! Please share them below if you feel comfortable to. Valued Contributor Our Valued Contributor for the month of December is Trans22! To read more about what a Valued Contributor is and how you can nominate a fellow community member, check out the 'Nominate a Valued Contributor' thread, here.

very lonely 36 year old guy

replies: 5

Hi, I am very very lonely. My wife left me 14 months ago and I am getting all the mental health support I can from my mental health care plan, but I'm just still extraordinarily lonely. I don't have any friends and I find it really hard to maintain f... View more

Struggling after covid to re-enter society, find a job and interact with people again.

replies: 1

Hello beyond blue, I'm new to this. I'm 31 and I've been dealing with some issues for a long time. I've never realy felt comfortable talking about this with anyone and I'm still not really. But I want to share, so here I am. I moved to a new state/city a few months before covid. Being stuck, isolated and on my own was hard at the start but it ended up being very freeing. Ive spent almost three years isolating myself from pretty much all social contact besides a few calls a month from my mum. This isolation has been comfortable and less stressful. I realise this is probably not a healthy mindset, but it is how I feel. But it cant last forever and I've been struggling recently (the last year) to re-enter society, find a job and interact with people again. At first I thought the isolation had worsened my anxiety issues. But i think its always been this bad and i was just constantly forced to live with it. Back home even though I was surrounded by friends and family I was still depressed, especially when I was alone with my thoughts. I ended up rambling alot more after this point, going into topics that might be trigerring. so I'll summarise it for the intro. My childhood was bad and I have been dealing with depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember. I've never sought help even at my lowest moments. I wish had and I hope i will. God helps those who help themselves which means nothing to those who feel helpless. Even as I write this I've been up all night unable to sleep becuase I have an interview at 2pm and its 7 am now. I will either go to the interview dead tired or skip it entirely and sleep. Its 50/50 right now.

Nominate a Valued Contributor here

replies: 39

Hi everyone, As a community that operates on the principle of 'give support to receive support', we have many members posting here who go above and beyond to reach out to others who are struggling. Some of these wonderful members have chosen to formally volunteer their time by becoming part of our community champion programme, but there are also many others posting daily and having a positive impact on the lives of our 100,000+ monthly visitors and members. The 'Valued Contributor' badge is our small way of recognising those members to say thanks for their ongoing support of others, and we're inviting the community to contact the moderation team with nominations for members that you feel should be recognised and acknowledged for their efforts. We will announce a new Valued Contributor on the 1st of each month, to give us time to review nominees' posts over a period of time. With only one Valued Contributor nomination considered for each month, we realise that some members providing wonderful support might feel overlooked. We would encourage you to use the Bouquet For Pearls thread to provide encouragement and thanks to members who you see providing great support for others. Prospective nominees may have been on our forums for some time, or may be relatively new. They may have posted frequently, or only occasionally. What's important is their impact on others and in the community. We will review the posts of all nominees against our five community values: Supportive - We encourage our members to give and receive support, sharing their stories and experiences in times of distress and wellness. Respectful - We respect where members are on their recovery journey, and listen without judgment. Empowering - We empower our members to make decisions that support good mental health and wellbeing. Safe - We support our members to talk openly about difficult subjects in a safe manner. Friendly - We approach all our discussions with kindness, warmth and always assume the best intentions. We will also take into account consistent support for others, and an understanding/respect for our community rules. We look forward to receiving your nominations. Click here to open an email window to send a nomination UPDATED: 2 July 2018

I'm having trouble with who I am.

replies: 2

I've felt like in the last few years I've changed and I don't recognise who I am anymore. My wife is about to leave me and work is more stressful than anything and I am constantly tired and keep getting thoughts of maybe it would be better if I was gone. But I don't want to leave my wife and kids. I keep struggling to do anything right, I can't figure out how to communicate well or at all. I feel so helpless and so weak I need help because I want my family to have the best husband and father they could ever want. But I don't know if I'm even strong enough

Single mum feeling empty and lonely

replies: 6

Hi I'm a 42-year-old single mum and feeling very lonely. I'm divorced and recently ended a long term relation ship because my partner could not accept that my son was my priority. He became more difficult to communicate with and things are very complicated at this stage. I know deep down that he doesn't care about me as much as I care about him. I feel stupid for investing so much into the relationship. I feel like I now have with nothing but I had to ask him to leave. I couldnt be what he wanted. I know I'm a mum so I chose that over my own needs. At night I feel so lonely but I block out my emotions so they don't consume me because I need to be strong for my son. I would really like to connect with other single parents. It's so hard doing everything on your own. I keep worrying that I am not giving my son everything he needs in life. Is there anyone else that has experienced something similar?

Hi there lovely people

replies: 19

Just wanted to make contact, i'm a bit of a technophobe & anxious about this whole online thing! But I need to find community, need to reach out after such isolation. Trying to look after myself as i have no local support, no that's not true, my dog ... View more

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

New Member Introduction replies: 6

Where to start? replies: 5

I have made a mess. replies: 13

Monthly Forums Update: Reflecting Back on 2022 replies: 10

very lonely 36 year old guy replies: 5

Struggling after covid to re-enter society, find a job and interact with people again. replies: 1

Nominate a Valued Contributor here replies: 39

I'm having trouble with who I am. replies: 2

Single mum feeling empty and lonely replies: 6

Hi there lovely people replies: 19