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Psychologist help

Guest_032
Community Member

I’m seeing (yet another) psychologist on Thursday. I’ve struggled to find someone that I connect with. If I’m paying for help, I want to get something out of it - strategies etc. Rather than just having my feelings validated etc.

So I kinda want to go into this appointment with a bit of a list of what I want from them etc. Is that realistic? Just figure I’m paying out of pocket, and it isn’t really something that I can afford to do. So I want to get some value for my money.

What do you find your psychologist helps you with? At the moment I’m very reliant on medication. Major depression and severe anxiety. But yet my anxiety doesn’t seem to have a ‘reason’, I wake up feeling like I have knots in my belly for no reason etc, so I want to try and address that - obviously there are things going on that I’m not aware of consciously etc.

But I’m just not sure what to use them for - is strategy something that they can help with? Or should I look at that time as a time to offload some of my thoughts etc.

7 Replies 7

Doolhof
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Depanx,

I'd like to suggest that you print out what you have written here and hand that to the psychologist and ask them how they can help you.

Usually the first visit is one where the psychologist asks lots of questions to get to know you and your situation.

In the past I have even posted in back ground information to a psychologist or psychiatrist, only to have it not mentioned at all on the visit unless I bring it up myself.

Maybe write down your expectations and ask the psychologist how they help and assist people.

Wishing you all the best, cheers from Dools

baet123
Community Member

Hi Depanx,

I think the way you are seeing many psychologists can be frustrating but is important as my mental health condition drastically starting improving when I found a psychiatrist whom I really felt cared for me and clicked with me instantly. When you find that health professional you will know and fingers crossed that the one you see tomorrow is the one!

Dools made a great point above to write down what you want out of the sessions and present that to them. That way you both have a clear picture of what you want from the psychologist and what intervention methods the psychologist has up their sleeve which they can put in place to potentially improve your situation.

Your psychologist should be there to support you and you should use it as a time to offload your thoughts as you mentioned but primarily in my opinion they are their to help you through numerous intervention/treatment methods. Some methods that are regularly used include:

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - Type of psychotherapy that helps the person to change unhelpful or unhealthy habits of thinking, feeling and behaving. CBT involves the use of practical self-help strategies, which are designed to affect positive and immediate changes in the person’s quality of life.
  • Exposure Therapy
  • Therapeutic Therapy

Those are just a few methods of intervention/treatment you should discuss with your psychologist tomorrow.

I look forward to hearing from you and let us know how your appointment goes tomorrow.

Hope this helped.

Baet123

blondguy
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Depanx

Thankyou for being here and posting with us!

Doolhof and Baet123 have posted invaluable posts above through their own experience.

I also understand the pain you are going through as having depression/anxiety can be a dark place to be in. I have many years with these awful feelings.... in recovery and doing a lot better with super frequent counseling. I take meds like yourself and have invested a lot of time with my counselor(s)...especially my GP

You mentioned "But yet my anxiety doesn’t seem to have a ‘reason’"....I used to think the same way....as in looking for a 'reason' for my anxiety. Looking for a reason for our anxiety feelings/symptoms is understandable yet it wont help us, as we have to treat the symptoms so we can heal more effectively

May I ask how long you have anxiety for?

Just a note...sometimes we really do need the meds so we can function in our job/career and personal life too. I wasted 10 years of my life thinking I could self heal...and I was wrong...My anxiety/depression only increased..unfortunately

I really hope you can post back with any questions or comments...The forums are a non judgemental and SAFE place for you to post with us. Your privacy and well being is paramount on the forums

my kind thoughts

Paul

I feel that I’ve always had some form of anxiety. Though it’s been extremely bad since probably the end of last year.

I also agree that the reason doesn’t really matter... though one of my psychologists that I was seeing kept pressing for it, and telling me that without it I wouldn’t be able to treat it. But I honestly think in some ways, I’m just an anxious person, and extreme stress has compounded it all for the anxiety and depression as there’s only so much that I can cope with. So trying to look at stress reduction etc. But I also realise it’s not going to be as simple as just that.

Hey Depanx,

Some people are naturally anxious and that is completely normal. Many are just born always being anxious and that is something we have to deal with and learn to manage. I do agree with you that the levels of stress you are under at the moment has brought your anxiety to the forefront and made it apparent for the time being. It will be tough and a struggle at times to cope but know we are here for you and would love to hear from you whenever you feel like posting. Life isn't easy unfortunately but we have to keep pushing and staying strong.

Keep us posted.

All the best,

Nick

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Depanx, great comments from those above.

It is always good to go in to see a psychologist with a list of items you want to talk about and/or a list of what the problems are, so all of these issues are very deep because once you start talking about one item, it may lead onto another tangent which could create a much deeper problem, that's where I'm sorry for you because it's not what you expected but really something that is troubling you.

It may take a couple of visits to know whether you feel connected to the psych, because the first session is basically getting to know each other and showing them the list.

Stress is your reaction to a trigger and is generally a short-term experience for some, and is a response to a threat in any situation, whereas anxiety, is a sustained mental health disorder that can be triggered by stress and can hang around for quite a while.

It can cause problems in all areas of being able to function.

It's certainly happened to me and I'm sure this involves many others.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

Guest_032
Community Member
Well the psychologist I saw was amazing. She talked about the window of emotional regulation. HOw emotional regulation is a learned skill. So that’s what we’re going to work on. Said I can’t expect to be able to regulate my emotions if I haven’t been shown etc. Said that anxiety is when you go above the window of emotional regulation and depression is when you go below. So said it can be quite tricky to medicate for both depression and anxiety. She doesn’t want me to stop any of the coping mechanisms that I’m using at the moment. But she said I can research some new ones, she’ll also give me some coping mechanisms at my next appointment (in 2 weeks). She also suggested putting my feelings on a number scale. So that I could help to identify before things got too bad, but also to identify what coping mechanisms would be appropriate to use at the time. But I’m feeling really positive.