Struggling to keep moving forward

[zp1]

Hi all,

I’m new to this forum, but really need somewhere to go to.
I’m at a point in my life where I don’t want to keep moving forward. I’m 26 and should be enjoying my life with my partner, friends and family. For the last 3 months all I have wanted to do is stay away from everyone, put on a brave face at work and pretend like nothing is wrong. Now I feel it’s built up to the point where I just don’t care about my own life anymore. I have a lot of money stress and work stress that has pushed me into a huge hole. I struggle everyday now to find any joy or happiness in anything, I feel like I’m pretending constantly and it’s exhausting.

I don’t know how to get out of this. I don’t want to hurt the ones I love by taking my own life, but I’ve lost all hope and motivation to keep going.

[Isabella_]

Hey there,

Welcome to the forums. I'm really glad that you opened up on here.. Thank you for sharing with us.

I can see you're really overwhelmed and you're struggling to keep going.. You feel like you should be enjoying your life and the things in front of you, but you aren't able to at the moment. You need somewhere to turn to. You've come to a great place. I can hear you and the pain you're in. We may not know each other, but I'm here to chat and listen when you need it and I really hope that counts for something.

You don't have to answer these questions if you aren't comfortable, but I'm curious.. Have you had a history of self harm, suicidal thoughts or attempts? Have you made any plans to end your life? Have you thought about how you might do it?

I know that the thoughts become all consuming and hard to get out of. When you're in this situation, please know that Lifeline (13 11 14) is there for you to help you, and you can reach out to them when you feel you need to. You can also text them at 0477 13 11 14 if you aren't comfortable speaking over the phone.

Another helpful contact is Beyond Blue at 1300 22 4636 to speak with a mental health professional, 24/7. It might be helpful for you to keep these numbers written somewhere just in case you need them. I know it's not easy to contact them, but they're truly great supports.

You're under a lot of stress right now, and it sounds like you've been handling this and carrying this weight on your shoulders for a very long time. You struggle to find happiness and you're putting on a facade that you're okay all the time.. Of course that would be incredibly exhausting. I'm sorry that you've been in the situation where you haven't been able to let people in on what is going on.

Please know I'm here to talk if you need to. ❤️

[Petal22]

Hi zp1,

Wellcome to our forums!

Im really sorry you are feeling this way.

I understand it’s so difficult to feel like we are in a deep dark hole and don’t know how to move forward from it.

Please know your situation is temporary and things will get better for you…… please don’t give up.

I understand that you have money issues and work issues but all of this can be fixed and this is only material things it’s not your life!

Your life is in the thoughts that you hold of yourself inside your mind….. believe me there really is a way forward for you……. It’s within you 🙏

Have you been able to seek professional help? Maybe starting at you gp?

Im here to chat to you

[therising]

A warm welcome to you zp1

I feel so deeply for you as you face feeling yourself in this overwhelming black hole. Depression is a truly horrible torturous place to find yourself in. From my experience, it feels like the loneliest place in the world, which makes it feel even worse. I'm so glad you came here to alleviate the loneliness and to express yourself and how you're feeling life. Here is where people don't automatically say 'You'll be right, you just need to get on with things'. I think this is one of the most triggering things someone can say to person who's feeling overwhelmed and lost. Here is where people will feel your pain, your sadness, your need to move forward strategically and so much more.

I believe, if there's one thing we should all be encouraged to develop when we're young it's the ability to sense the need for guidance. Unfortunately, more often that not the opposite is instilled in us - we're conditioned to be independent. If someone was to ask you 'Which 3 guides would you need most right now, in order to create a clearer path?' what do you feel would be the best 3? Perhaps a financial guide? Maybe a guide who could lead you to understand your feelings and thoughts and the reasons for them? Maybe a guide who has the ability to lead you to see and relate to a clearer vision of the future, where things don't appear so dark?

On the flip side, who would you not choose? Personally, I've found this to be key when it comes to the most constructive way forward, as opposed to the most destructive way forward. I never pick someone who will shut me down. Being shut down, when you really want to open up, is depressing. For example, if I was highly sensitive to a stressful situation, I would never go to someone who says 'You're way too sensitive, you need to toughen up and stop over analysing everything'. Depressing. Yes, I'm very sensitive. This sensitivity allows me to feel what is naturally stressful, the ability to feel the need for an alternative way of managing. I can 'toughen up' to become insensitive but this leads me to neglect my ability to feel my way through a challenge. Yes, I'm analytical, yet this trait is what enables me to analyse the hell out of everything, so as to find the heaven in whatever stage of personal evolution I'm going through. So, I would never seek guidance from someone who insists that the way forward involves me suppressing parts of myself.

Can you think of who you would choose as a guide and who you shouldn't?

[yggdrasil]

Hi zp1,

So sorry to hear how heavy and challenging things have gotten lately, but you've taken an amazing step by reaching out on here. It's very confronting taking that first step, so you should feel proud.

I was in a similar state to what you've described for many years in my 20s. It's a dark place to get to, but you can get out of it step by step. For me it's been a long journey, but you can definitely make progress and get past it.

Have you ever spoken to your GP about these feelings? They can help you set up a mental health care plan, which provides subsidised sessions with a psychologist or social worker. They can also help rule out any physical factors affecting your mood and sense of wellbeing - such as low B12 or low iron.

If you ever get to crisis point and are at risk of doing something dangerous, you can call Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467). I have both of them on speed dial on my phone, and called them many times when I was in a bad place.

Please keep reaching out for help from wherever you feel comfortable. These are challenging things to deal with, and there are no easy answers, but by asking for help you're taking a fantastic step. Take care,

yggdrasil