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I get depressed if I can't get a job then once I have a job it causes me so much anxiety that I can barely eat or sleep.
It's like I will never be happy no matter what I do. I got told off the other day for forgetting about an upcoming holiday that I've had booked for months ( I just started a new job) in my defence I'm 5 months pregnant and forget ALOT!
now it's all I can think about, that I've done something so wrong that nothing I do will make my boss happy.
I hate living this life, I feel bad for bringing a child into this shitty world.
Hi Malibu500, welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing with us your current situation. Oh dear, I am sorry that you feel anxious with new employment. Has it occured to you that anxiety can be a natural feeling upon starting a new job? New environment, new co-workers and also the fact you have your training wheels on again with learning the ropes. I too have experienced anxiety when Ive got a new job, that I am going to make a mistakes and get fired because of it! But however your new employer would understand that you are only new and it is going to take some time for you to settle into your new role. As per not eating or sleeping, you could approach your manager and ask for some extra support if you feel like you need that to settle in. Mangers have the responsiblity to emotionally support their employees too, otherwise they are not a good manager. Being pregnant you will also be going through alot with hormonal changes and this will effect your mood too. Pregnant women can have feelings of depression. I suggest going to see your GP, midwife or Obstitrition and telling them about the feelings that you are experiencing. They will be able to help you manage your emotions. We all make mistakes, that is character building. We are all human and we are subject to forgetfulness. The one thing that will make your boss happy is that you do you job well, im sure your boss has seen other mistakes worse then the one you made.
If you feel like you need to talk to somone for support you can give the beoyone blue support like a call and speak to a professional. Or life line a call on 13 11 14
There is also the perinatal mental health helpline (PANDA) 1300 726 306
It sounds like you are having a tough time but I'm glad that you decided to reach out to us. Pregnancy can affect your hormonal levels as well as mood, which can be a reason why you might feel more anxious. I'm not sure if you've seen someone in regards to your anxiety or spoken to someone about it. If not I would suggest reaching out to your GP and asking whether you could see a psychologist or counsellor to talk about your current situation. A psychologist can help you with your symptoms of anxiety and can also identify what triggers it and provide you with ways to help manage it so it doesn't affect your life.
It is normal to be anxious at a new job, so try not to be too hard on yourself. It takes time to get used to a new environment and a new job. In terms of your boss, he might have been upset at the time, but it doesn't mean he will hold it against you. All you need to do is to try your best, do the work to the best of your ability, your boss will see that and he will appreciate your hard work and efforts and he will be happy.
I know with the pandemic life seems to be a bit more negative, but know that things are constantly changing and we can only hope for the better. Hope this helps.