Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 96

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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feel like i can’t keep doing this.

replies: 5

my family is abusive. i miss my cat. i keep falling ill because my girlfriend and her mum keeps getting sick from work. i’m sick of being sick. it’s been three times in about the past month. i have really bad anxiety around illness and my girlfriend doesn’t respect it. i get really suicidal thoughts when i’m sick. i have nowhere to call home. i don’t have my cat, who is my best friend. i keep falling ill and there’s nothing i can do about it. i want to say that it’ll pass, but it feels like it never will. i can’t keep going like this. i’m exhausted. physically, mentally, emotionally. my family are being really terrible people. i just really miss my cat. i’m so sick of being sick. i just want my own home. that would solve all of this. i cant keep the act up. they say money doesn’t buy happiness, but it would get rid of at least 80% of my issues. i don’t want to be repetitive... but i just can’t do this. i’m in pain. i’m upset. i have nothing. nothing. now that i’m out of school and have no hope in buying a home anytime soon i have NOTHING. i feel so weak and worn out. i just really want to hug my cat right now.

struggling

replies: 3

so ive been struggling so much recently. i had this absolutely awful agitation in my head for about 2 weeks in april after on-going anxiety attacks and ocd symptoms. Ever since then its been a constant struggle with anxiety, panic attacks, derealisation, depersonalisation, brain fog and awful severe and chronic insomnia. Every day i feel weak and fatigued and im struggling with the unknown of the condition as to whether or not this is a mental or physical condition. I've always had strong health anxiety so im sure its the cause but its still so debilitating right now. It's gotten to the point where i'm seeking help from psychiatrists and psychologists every day and even frequently visiting the ER. Every night the symptoms are worse and the intrusive thoughts and agitation are unbearable, i simply can't stop them or distract myself from this. I'm getting some medication today for anxiety so hopefully that helps but im just really in a bad place and may even talk to my psychiatrist about inpatient treatment if it gets any worse. if anyone could recommend other methods of coping or any advice it would be greatly appreciated, because its getting very hard to cope and my intrusive thoughts have progressed to thoughts of suicide to relieve the pain from all of these symptoms.

strong urges

replies: 43

i have been clean for almost 2 months now, im super proud of myself, but after not really thinking about it for days I will randomly get really strong urges? AAh i know its probably normal but its really not fun, anyone got any tips to deal with urge... View more

I just feel so sad

replies: 4

I’m sorry for wasting your time. There are others that need you more but, the thing is that my teens are growing up. This is common, I know, the fact that they push me away is normal and healthy but... the thing is I have anxiety I am on meds for this but their words hurt me. Sometimes when I am down I hurt myself, it makes me feel better. It makes me feel alive. I feel anxious posting this, I may not come back and I think I will delete this message and my account.

Chronic ideation

replies: 33

Hi, Hopefully I'm within guidelines, let me know if not! So I've always struggled with anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation. The three things are almost like domino's, anxiety leading to depression to ideation, quite quickly. I finally had enough mid year and went to the GP and was put on SSRI. it helped a lot for months. Sadly, the crazy season tipped me over the edge and I feel hard. Interestingly, the warning sign for me is the prevalence of suicidal ideation that occurs. Those thoughts are always there (even when I'm relatively happy) but the thoughts are coming thick and fast now. I won't go into detail, but it is always the same mechanism of death, over and over and over. Last night I almost fell into old habits and called someone to stay using again (it has been a decade). The motivation for this was extremely scary, and holding back was hard. I woke up this morning again in a bad state (though better than yesterday). Does anyone have any advice on pushing through this? I don't want to feel like this anymore. Thanks

Want To Leave This Place

replies: 6

Two nights ago I was dropped off at the hospital by my friend. I was having a very unhappy night (which has been a regular occurrence for months now). I had been at home by myself for three nights, and I was very distressed and lonely. I ended up drinking half a bottle of vodka... I also self-harmed. I ended up messaging my friend, telling her I wanted to go to the hospital. She got one of our friend's to come round and pick me up. When they arrived, I was lying down on the floor in the lounge room. My friend drove me to the hospital. After waiting for four hours, I needed to rush to the toilet, as I started feeling like I needed to throw up all of a sudden. I knelt over the toilet, needing to vomit, but nothing was coming out, and I couldn't regurgitate or anything.... so I sat down on the toilet, then after a few moments, I started to rapidly overheat. I was so hot that I started to quickly strip off my clothes (my two jumpers). I wanted to take my t-shirt and pants off too, because I was so hot, but I couldn't because I was in hospital. At this point, I was excessively sweating and felt really faint and dizzy. All of a sudden, I could feel this intense feeling, I could feel my ears losing their hearing (fading away), and it felt like my entire body and nervous system was fading away/about to shut down. Three nurses rushed in to help me... The exact same thing happened to me again after I was finally taken through into the hospital... After having blood test taken, I felt the same thing and started rapidly overheating, but this time it was 10 times more intense. I had to get back onto the floor and sit up against the wall. I felt so sick that I was making physical noises of pain and discomfort. Since that night, I have self harmed, and had urges to admit myself back into hospital.

BPD

replies: 3

Hi there, I don't like doing this but its about time I did. I've going through this since I was young. To be honest I have so much I want to achieve but terrible flash backs comes into my head when I try something new. Either ends being in the ED, ward or dropping out on the first day. I'm currently working but my hours has been drastically reduce. Part of the blame is me, so company is made these decision upon my safety and others. Looking for another to make more income and pay for my bills and but I'm a workaholic. If I don't work I'm my mood is constant battle. I don't have much going on right now. Currently my partner is away, its been a few months so everything has changed and its back to my old habits. He understand my conditions but I feel guilty because he doesn't deserve this or keep taking care of me. Needs to live his life and achieve his goals without me stopping. I'm absolutely grateful for the day we met till now. No one stay by my side because I know for the fact is was intense and scary for them. My first love now my ex bf his mom took him away from me because she didn't approve I was suffering from mental health. I understand she lost her son years ago, but I would never hurt him and I promised her and tried to prove to her I care for him with all my heart. The day I was released from the ward and came back from holiday he instantly broke up with him. He shattered my heart and I became depress and made bad decision. I spent in the ward for a month while he was on holiday. My family visited me everyday but I wasn't myself that time. Over the years I've posted disturbing post on social media so I can make people feel the my pain but it was pleasure for me. I know it's wrong but it made me happy. I know I'm an attention seeker , I know my moods are bad. I try to change but same time I don't want too. My older sister suffers from a disability so over the years I keep thinking what the future will hold. I know I scared my little sister over the years as she grows and watch me struggle. I'm trying to be a better role model. But I keep going back and up. I'm constantly feeling lonely, depress, weird, ok, happy. My thoughts are horrible and I start to laugh at it. I have 2 dogs their my best friends but sometimes I don't care at all. I know there's a lot that I'm saying here, but I just want myself back. Overall I'm financially struggling, depress, suicide thoughts, self harm, destructive and selfish. Thank you for listening and reading this

I hate myself and really can’t see a point

replies: 10

Everyone always says the same crap. It’s all lies and I honestly do not see any future…but I won’t kill myself, it causes people too much upheaval dealing with that and that’s not fair. I feel like I have failed everything and have nope I can truly rely on. I am a loathe-some overly serious person that eventually everyone gets tired of. I wasn’t always like this but now it’s layer upon layer so I think this is how I will always be. I don’t trust medication so I don’t see that as an option either. so I will wait out my days.

Feeling alone and made a big mistake moving here

replies: 3

Hi, I'm new here. I've just moved interstate and feeling alone more than ever. Not supported and feel as though I've made a huge mistake. Thoughts of taking my life keep swirling around my head. I'm doing and trying my best but just not good enough. View more

I feel so alone

replies: 7

Not really sure how to write this or how to explain how I feel so I apologise in advance. I'm a 22 year old uni student who is struggling with some of the worst stress and anxiety I have ever experienced. I'm not a very emotional person, I have always struggled with my mental health and have had prior diagnoses of depression and social anxiety that I heavily internalise. But as of recent I just feel so helpless and alone, like I have hit my lowest, I can't sleep properly, I am not eating, and just don't feel like I want to be here any longer. I am not sure what's wrong with me, I struggle to maintain relationships with people which makes me feel so alone. I don't think I am a bad guy, I try my hardest for everyone who means anything to me and it just never feels good enough, I just want to feel like people care about me. I lack friendships or circles where I feel welcomed and I really wonder sometimes if people would even notice if one day I just disappeared. I have recently tried to seek help through the campus doctor and have booked myself into see a counsellor but I am just not sure talking is going to help. I could yell and feel like no one would hear me, I have overwhelming thoughts of suicide and feel like a prisoner in my own mind, trapped my by own self doubt and like nothing will ever work out. I worry about university, I worry about the people around me leaving me and I worry about being in this state forever, it's unbearable and I am kinda at the end of my rope. Recently I started seeing a girl at university and as much as I care about her I just don't feel it's going to work, we both care but the age gap for her (31) is too much and no matter how hard I try, no matter how much I care it just wont be enough and it eats me alive. I keep asking is it worth being so upset over this girl, but no matter what I can't get her off my mind. But I feel like this has been a major blow to any self esteem I had left, I care about her so much and once again it's just not good enough... I worry so much about my university marks in this bridging program and failing to achieve the degree I am after too.. I just can't focus, I try so hard to achieve the best I can and I feel like everything on my mind is stopping me from being the best I can be. If I don't make it then I think it might just be the final straw. I'm sorry to whoever reads this.. this is kind of all over the place and probably just seems like nonsense, im not good at this.

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 96

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

feel like i can’t keep doing this. replies: 5

struggling replies: 3

strong urges replies: 43

I just feel so sad replies: 4

Chronic ideation replies: 33

Want To Leave This Place replies: 6

BPD replies: 3

I hate myself and really can’t see a point replies: 10

Feeling alone and made a big mistake moving here replies: 3

I feel so alone replies: 7