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Advice and plain old love

GTL
Community Member

To all who come here, I send my love to you. I have been down this road too. Often. When the body is tired and the spirit exhausted, it is hard to continue. But I know know that my depression is a full-body thing. We can all meet plain old sadness head on if we are well. It is a natural part of life. But I have one observation for you from my experiences. I had a realisation after changing medications, that my suicidal ideations were no caused by my sadness or despair.

It was the full 6-week wait for my new meds to kick in. (I could not be on the old meds and the new at the same time). It became obvious that no traumas in the world could cause such sudden grief and such black thinking; it was not logical. There was nothing more wrong with me than normal. It was my chemistry, my brain and my body that was telling me to die – not me. I waited for six weeks even though I could not stop planning my death. I survived because I realised those thoughts were not real. The doctor was right, the new meds were a better fit and were worth it.

Remember, it is our whole self – muscles, bones, fluids, and neurons that are depressed. Our thoughts are just the triggered illusion of who we are. They are not permanent. I got my body right. My chemicals and muscles eventually succumbed to treatment. Now I enjoy talk therapy and love just plain old talk.

Live for others, live for yourself and be patient and kind. Don’t fight your body, give it help. Let the thoughts of killing your body come and go. They are the natural expression of a system that is out of order. Slowly get stronger, don’t expect your thoughts to change on their own. When you are well, you will be able to embrace sadness then let that too pass in time. Believe me, that will be worth waiting for. I am emerging from the tunnel of darkness, and you may too if you see your GP, get the assistance you deserve, then exercise, and let your thoughts come and go as they will. They are not your master.

4 Replies 4

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi GTL,

A really great post and thankyou.

The only additions I'd put to those you listed is to seek your own spiritual "home" and to get a pet, hobby and/or interest. A spiritual home can be religion or in my case a strong connection to a person that can lead you to inner peace.

You have highlighted a recipe of actions that result in a better way to survive. Not one thing alone eg medication will give a sufferer the magic they seek.

A couple of links/threads below might interest you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhrtbBrMQ1Y

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3aFh7OJMNA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X30sWycWz4o

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/meditation---words-of-wisdom---it-helped-me-for-25-years

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/medication-is-a-whirlpool

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/depression/depression-and-the-timing-of-motivation

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/switching-mindsets

TonyWK

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion
hi, just wanted to say I liked your post and hope to see you around the forums.

mmMekitty
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi GTL,

Thank you for your post. Your experience has certainly provided you with a perspective, a way of percieving your thoughts as products of a chemically unbalanced brain, recognising .them as electrical impulses occuring in your brain, & permitting you to take a step back, & regard them 'clinically' - certainly helpful.

For myself, the meds I was on were not actually doing much at all. It is all the emotions & memories , & all the thoughts & feelings I have relating to them that I have to deal with. So, I appreciate the therapy I am able to have with the particular Psychiatrist I have found.

& valuing & caring for ourselves & those around us is very important as well.

😺mmMekitty

geoff
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello GTL, Tony has provided many links for you to browse as well as mmMekitty joining in.

When someone is depressed for any reason, then they don't love themselves because not only does this illness deny this, it also doesn't allow for them to love others, the way they used to.

The only person who knows whether or not the medication prescribed to you is going to benefit you is you yourself, the doctors may believe it's going to work from your past history, but only you will know and if it can bring back some love in your life, then it must be of some advantage in helping you to recover.

We all desire to be loved, even if it's only by one person, because it gives us the opportunity to have a stronger heart and seems to give us a third leg that will provide the strength we have lost.

Best wishes.

Geoff.