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what is normal?

Crabby
Community Member
Hi, i am here to try to find out if what is happening in my head is normal and others experiance the same.
43 Replies 43

james1
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi Crabby,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for posting here.

I understand it can be tricky to make the first post and good on you for having the courage to come here in the first place. I'm 24 and currently suffering from depression, anxiety and lying somewhere on the borderline personality spectrum.

Did you want to share how you're feeling at the moment? It sounds like you're a bit confused whether your thoughts are "normal" or not. I'm not sure what they are, but I don't think there's really such thing as "normal" or not...only difficult to cope with, or not.

We'd love to help you and I hope you feel safe here. Everyone here is very kind and supportive.

James

geoff
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
hi Crabby, a good question, but how do any of us know what 'normal' means, so I'm sure that each one of us has our own opinion or description, but that's only a general comment, because it changes once we become depressed so that word is thrown out the window.
Let us know what is going on with these thoughts of yours,so we can then help you. Geoff.

blondguy
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Crabby, great question...like Geoff & James mentioned 'normal' is really a broad general term.

Just for me the word is meaningless as I have never met a 'normal' person in my life.

If you wish to share anymore you are more than welcome. The forums are rock solid secure and we are a judgement free zone too 🙂

My kind thoughts for you...thankyou for posting too!

Paul

Crabby
Community Member
Tnks James, and every one. I spend a lot of time on the road on my own and enjoy my own company. i relate to others that i dont know well better than those i do. I love dire straits and the eagles but somtimes i will be listening to music that makes me cry for no apparent reason. i will also be singing along in my own little world and feel realy sad. This is usualy because i am reflecting on a long past history of probably under achieving. ( thats why my spelling is so bad) Probably i best ask , do other people feel this way? on the outside i am happy and people comment i am so good to be around but they dont see the me inside. I read about bipolar stuff and somtimes wonder if i am. I dont want to hurt any one and i dont want to hurt my self i just want to be alone sometimes and pretend the world doesnt exist. I tryed to put a picture of a lady bug in a lava field on my pic but it isnt aproved yet. that is me i guess.

james1
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hey crabby, sorry about the late reply.

It's great that you enjoy you're own company, but it does sound like you're carrying a bit of weight from your past.

Without knowing you, it's probably not my place to comment, but I think there's usually a reason for feeling like we haven't achieved what we wanted to, and rarely is that actually a character flaw. More typically, it's because we had different priorities or emotional stress (that we didn't understand), and all of a sudden we turn around and we don't like what we see. But the most important thing is to recognise that we are where we are, and all we can do is decide how to keep moving forwards. To me, you've already done heaps by coming here in the first place and I think that deserves a real congratulations. It's tough opening up to strangers especially for someone, like yourself, who doesn't usually do this.

I can't speak for everyone, but a lot of people here including myself also keep our feelings close. For me, I worry about how others will treat me if I open up. Not because I think they'll be mean, but because I think it'll make the conversation uncomfortable and about me, but I don't want that. So I absolutely understand what you mean by being happy on the outside but no one ever seeing what's on the inside.

But more recently I have been opening up and I really can't emphasise just how helpful it has been. You'll be surprised about how many people have struggled with mental illnesses and just feeling "abnormal". Where I am, it's a lot more acceptable now and, even though you'll get the odd person who's just plain rude, most people are at least accepting if not understanding.

You mentioned you've been reading up about bipolar which has gotten me wondering whether you've been feeling some of those depressive symptoms. I think it's good to be aware of what you feel, but it's best to leave the diagnosis and treatment to the professionals. Do you have a good GP you can talk to about this? You can also tell us how you feel as well. It helps sometimes to get those thoughts out.

I think it's also really important to have other support as well like friends or family if possible. Otherwise, there's always the BeyondBlue support line on 1300 22 4636.

Of course, I'd love to hear more from you as well so please feel free to keep posting when you feel comfortable.

My kindest thoughts

James

Crabby
Community Member

Thank you James for your comments. Are you clairvoyant or something? I haven't been back for a while because i seem to get on top of how i am feeling for a while and then the swamp seems to fill with alligators and then some one starts to drain it.

I was unsure how this forum works and thought the response time would be quicker so went and did my own thing as well. unfortunately i am not confident in talking to the people around me about this because i am afraid of their reaction of "he's a loonie" because that is still very prevalent in our town. from the general readings i think i am just a normal under to much self pressure, that tends to get out side of me. the bipolar referance was because of my mood swings from Adrenalin hi to balling my eyes out lows but not self destructive. Probably that is my real question. do others feel this way as well?

blondguy
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey Crabby

Im sorry that your town still has the silly mentality of 'he's a loonie' That is sad. I actually feel sorry for them.

The overflow of adrenaline can make us more over alert and 'jumpy' to anything. I feel the same way Crabby

I have had bad anxiety for about 13 years and now depression, including the mega hi's and bad lows....I am lucky as I have a crackerjack GP who helped me with some meds that help me out big time.

you are not on your own here Crabby

My Best

Paul

CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Crabby and welcome.

Yes, I get like that at times. I can be out and about, feeling happy and then I get home and I feel down and moody or sad. Music does trigger memories and certain feelings, we remember what we were doing and feeling at the time the song came out. I love 80's music and it does trigge something in me. I was a teenager in a the 80's I was happy but depressed at times. Particular songs do stir things up, I was also very lonely at that time.

if you are concerned a visit to your gp would be good.

Hope to hear how it all goes

cmf x

wantalife
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Cant help but reply ...Nerve was hit and the Question "What is normal" ? What I believe is what is Normal is a place you are comfortable within yourself" those who may be in state of suffering (It is for me currently) but for all seems to be a target.. I never could understand this. ? Perhaps sheep type mentality. I don't want to be like everyone else