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Wanting to not feel so alone!!

Rooster19
Community Member

Hi I am in a pretty isolated place right now. I just wanna see if someone can relate to my situation.

I turn 40 on Saturday. I resigned from a teaching career three weeks ago which wasn't working for me so now I have had to move back in with my Mum which is 1500km away from where I was working. Being 40 and living with my Mum is not something I am very happy with. I naively thought I was fitter and more adaptable than it turns out I am.

I would like to work in a job that is hands-on like a trade. I don't know whether I can because I have a back issue and other things that come with being my age. I would also like to become confident and resilient enough to meet a woman and start a family. I thought doing a job that fulfilled me might help but now I don't now what to do for a career. The whole trade thing feels like it might have been a bit of a pipe dream and something I should have investigated 20 years ago. Feeling pretty shattered and disappointed right now.

I am struggling to find my identity and self-belief in a new environment. As a 40yo single, unemployed male with 2 university degrees who is very unhappy with himself, I am very unsure of where to start.

Is it possible to find hope and overcome things like this? Can anyone please share any similar experiences that could offer me some hope?

Do I start on the mental health side of things first (treatment etc)? Being unemployed at least I don't have added job stressors. Should I try and somehow sweep all the relationship stuff aside? I have never had a girlfriend before.

This is just an honest snapshot of where I am at. If anyone can relate to my situation, please reply to this thread. I would appreciate not feeling so alone with this all.

Kind regards

1 Reply 1

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion

hi and welcome.

we each have our own ways of dealing with stressful situations or jobs. Some people find it easier to the resign from their job without anything to go to. It was something that was suggested to me some time ago but... I am about 10 years older than you and looking to change careers. That is the aim anyway. I have completed the diploma and waiting for the paperwork to turn up now. If there is something else that you would like to do then you can chase that dream.

as far as mental heath issues are concerned, if there are things you want to talk about with a professional and work through that would be a good idea also. Whether you can work part or full time while getting help is something only you would be able to decide.

Is there much work available where you live?

If not, then perhaps volunteering?

What do you think has stopped you in forming a relationship?

I would be interested to hear more of your story. Going back about 2 years, it was suggest that I quit my job an do something like work at Coles until I got myself sorted out. Well... I am still sorting myself out, but better off from when things started.

I have said that I put my health before other things and to a large extent I have - it sounds like you are doing this as well. It can seem like things may never get better. And yet there are others in similar situations.

Listening to you,

Tim