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The frog and the scorpion. Our nature

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Briefly the story goes like this-

A scorpion eager to get to the other side of the river asked a frog to transport him there in his back. The frog refused telling the scorpion that he'd sting him once he got there and he'd die. The scorpion insisted he wouldn't kill him so the frog took him to the other side. Almost at the bank the scorpion sung the frog and before dying the frog asked the scorpion why he did that as he pledge he wouldn't....the scorpion replied "because its in my nature"..

And so we come to the theme here. The inherent qualities both good and bad inside us that cannot be changed. The foundation of our character will not budge. All the other parts that are plasticine can be moulded to improve on our faults. But we really are a ship on a course with our nature.

That leads me to ask the question- if there is a characteristic you don't like (often highlighted by another person) that is in ground in your personality, what can you do about it?

E.g. I have a slight anger problem. I usually brush it off with "stress" but in reality I have to own it. Even though it's my nature, with anger there is a victim, be it a slight raising of your voice (my case), or worse.

The fact remains, change is near impossible. The "slight raising of my voice" is the result of a build up of disappointment that one tries to suppress, then balm! It all overflows.

I've come to the realisation that with the ever predicted outburst if I can move on quickly then life's good. However if that event repeats itself too often the victim can tire of it.

To judge if your trait is inherited just look at members of your blood family. Do they get angry? Are they selfish?

To summarize- we are talking about personality flaws we don't choose, they are part of your inherited make up.

Do you have any and how do you control them?

Tony

35 Replies 35

Thats good news, A few quotes-

  • Wisdom goes missing when we are anxious
  • Perspective is distorted when we rush
  • We should stop saving the world
  • Anxious moments build up to mountainous peaks of emotion over time that bite you years later
  • Anxiety leads to depression. Stop it if possible
  • Worry is non productive except developing ulcers
  • your calmness is a priority over restlessness

TonyWK

Hi TonyWK!

Great quotes! I really love quotes, especially when I find ones that truly speak to me!

Some of the ones that have been helping me with my anxiety:

- (From a fortune cookie) A single cloud can eclipse the sun

- Worrying is suffering twice

- Everyday is a good day (Comment: this quote helps to remind me to try to see the positive in the day no matter what I have been through)

Guest9337
Community Member

Scorpions do not lie. Thus a scorpion will never even pretend to you or others that it won't sting you and thus the entire story is an anthromorphological disaster. Like that long word there!

What I say is that in truth, Humans will lie, and they have the right to lie in relationships, but they do not have the right to sting you physically. Thus the Human who says they will never hurt you might seem like a great thing to aim for, but ultimately they may prove themselves wrong for their overreaching about honesty or harm.

Much better to say, yes I have hurt people before and I redressed that harm appropriately. I want to love you, but such love is a commitment that goes way past hurt or harm and goes into pure acceptance that I will hurt you even when I am trying not to, and yes, you will hurt me, even though you do not want to. So instead let us say, that we aim to do no hurt, but when we become aware we have hurt someone else, then we will take immediate and appropriate action to redress all of the hurts and their associated hurts and hope to heal and make well that which we hurt.

love dng.

Re : we should stop saving the world.

I look at this in several ways. Sometimes saving the world is such a massive job that we should avoid taking on that burden for it may be too heavy and crush us under it. Another way is that we are already saving the world, just by incrementally improving ourselves! For we literally are made of the stuff/atoms/chemicals of this world and when we save ourselves, we are thus saving the world by default!

Is "saving" just one creature or just one person, or even just one historical building an expression of improvement to just that one thing, or does that saving spread out and ripple across the globe and contribute to our humanity? I think sometimes it ripples and sometimes it stops at one, but sometimes that stopping at one, is itself a ripple of saving that spreads : how about yourself?

These quotes are often made to put things into context.

If we branch out away from our normal line of thinking for some reason then we need to realise where we are going wrong and correct it.

In the case of "stop trying to save the world", that refers to the "whiteknight syndrome" (hence my avatar name) which is to save people or enforce justice to the point whereby you damage yourself. Eg If a policeperson worked tirelessly to enforce the law and did not rest or chill out a little now and then he/she could end up harmed mentally and physically. This "save the world" quote would be apt because the level of devotion is out of whack compared to say the average work done by the average police officer. People the try to "save the world" obviously have elevated anxiety and often some other illness eg hyperactivity from bipolar mania or ADHD.

As for "Scorpions do not lie" the story is a metaphor and was told in the mini series "The Bangkok Hilton" in the context of someone in jail telling another person (Nicole Kidman) how not to trust anyone. It didnt matter if it was a frog, a scorpion, a beaver and a snake. I dont know if you got that or not David.

TonyWK

G'day white knight, thx for ur reply.

I am aware of the story, it is an old tale, and I first became aware of it in Star Trek Voyager, episode Scorpion parts 1 and 2. It's a cool story which I like, but it is actually one of those stories that can be useful or might not be.

The story as you say is about not trusting an entity that says "trust me".

The interesting analysis for me is that a scorpion truly never lies! So using a entity that never lies, as a means of talking about humans who do lie, creates an incongruence for me. That does not exclude others benefits from the story, nor even my own benefit for I like the story!

Fundamentally animals, insects, tree, birds, none of them lie at all, and thus using a "beast" to tell that story is itself hindering the acceptance that the real issue is that humans do lie and often they won't even admit they lie at all, neither to others, nor even themselves.

I just think the stories point is better said thusly.

"Humans may lie about their own trustworthiness."

No need to bring in fallacious positions about scorpions to express the actual concept about humans in just 7 words.

So, I'm not having a go at anyone, neither yourself, nor the story, nor the author, because such considerations are indeed fun! And revealing under analysis hey mate!

love dng.

Hi

Thankyou for clarifying.

As you see I try to use all tools at my disposal to spread a message or utilize it.

All for members benefit.

Of course scorpions don't lie! But they all have a saying in their tail lol

TonyWK

DNA meaning- the fundamental and distinctive characteristics or qualities of someone or something, especially when regarded as unchangeable.

Unchangeable characteristics! If ever you have been trying to transform yourself on things that you cant change, then you have been wasting your time.

This one real thing could, if accepted, free up a lot of time and effort to use to focus on what can be changed.

Eg My weight has been an issue all my 66 years. If people knew my parents, sister and those long gone up the family tree they'd realise I didnt have much of a chance being slim. I accepted that about 10 years ago and since then simply focus on what quality foods enter my body.

You might have other ideas of what you've tried to change without success and realise now how futile that was.

Talk about it if you want.

TonyWK

Ggrand
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi Tony and readers...🤗..

The meaning of DNA...is very intriguing and has me wondering now...if our mental health is also a part of our DNA structure...is it even possible to change those parts of our brain?....is our mh all part of a bigger picture of our DNA that has developed and grown into what it was supposed to do...and impossible to change it..

Kind thoughts dear Tony..

Grandy...

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Grandy

It's a good thing brainstorming and asking questions, even if we dont find the answers.

I believe some of us are more susceptible to mental illness than others. If a person was born as you but with different parents, she might not have succumbed to the mental struggles you have endured. Then again she might have gone on to be prime minister or not reached 18yo. This is the ultimate individualistic froentier in that you have ended up in your position because you as an individual ran your life that way and the cards fell where they fell. Some bad luck, some behaviours around you that created difficulties, cultures, poverty and lack of strength.

This is why I'm a strong advocate for not blaming people for their situation. The only time I think blame can be soundly attributed is repeated happenings as if nothing was learned.

I could also ask "what is life"? Life is many things but life is most importantly- unfair, hard to accept for its cruelty, indiscriminate, some entitled, some not, unpredictable, challenging etc but it can also be - inspirational, wonderful, powerful, kind, loving etc. The only obligation to ourselves is to ensure we survive it as long as we can and assist others to as well and to do that we should put more emphasis on forcing the positive to the surface and not allow the bad things to cover the surf.

To focus on the things we cannot change is wasted energy frothing to become worry that can manifest into a sad existence.

TonyWK