Staying well through difficult times

[JazzyB]

Hi

i’ve been having such a difficult time following my partner of 5 years separating from me. They wanted to open themselves up to seeing new ppl and having new experiences. My partner made up a huge part of life, including socially, through their amazing network or friends and in the queer community. Since separating I’ve not only found myself with all the negative narrative about myself (not good enough, worthy of rejection, failing at life, not special blah blah) I’ve found myself thrust into isolation as I have little friends. Since separating 6 months ago I have spiraled in lots of different ways. Although I have managed to look after myself in terms of healthy diet and daily exercise my anxiety, depression and bad thoughts have amplified. Despite being in therapy I’m finding no reprieve to liking myself or feeling content in life. Other than that the person and life I loved has abandoned me. I feel spiritually depleted and isolated from family as they don’t like to discuss emotions. My saving grace has been having a good job but as soon as I’m done for the day or weekend I go into complete emotional collapse at home. I’m trying to come up with a game plan on how I can move forward in life, feel good again about myself, make new friends. All of my attempts at this are failing and welcome any suggestions or advice.

[Doolhof]

Hi JazzyB,

Welcome to the community on the forum. Sorry to read of your recent separation. I believe that when we experience a separation, the loss of a loved one and a change in circumstances that we don't expect, we go through a grieving process.

There are different steps we go through when we grieve, it is a natural response to a sense of loss.

It sounds like you have been committed to working on your physical health, that is commendable. When I am depressed or anxious, I often find it difficult to eat healthy or exercise, so well done.

Are there activities you do enjoy that you could try to increase in your life? Make a list of things you might be able to do then decide how you could achieve those things in easy to do steps.

It sounds to me as though you know where you don't want to be, where you would rather be, you just need to connect those two up.

Can you make a plan for what you can do when you get home after work? I find that spare time when I am feeling depressed is unfulfilled time. Filling that time with a few positives is so beneficial.

At the end of each day, can you think of 3 things to be grateful for?

This is a safe place to share how you are feeling. People here understand emotions and mental health.

Cheers for now from Dools