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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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Jacko777 Reaction VS Response
  • replies: 5

Dear Folks, I am always on a journey, on a recovery from depression, I have found some peace and happiness and I would love to share something that has helped me; knowing the difference between a reaction and a response. Well into my 30's my life had... View more

Dear Folks, I am always on a journey, on a recovery from depression, I have found some peace and happiness and I would love to share something that has helped me; knowing the difference between a reaction and a response. Well into my 30's my life had been shaped by my unchecked stinking thinking that had resulted from a serious life event. R.I.P. Mum. I had developed fears and phobias, I was depressed, anxious and angry. Instigated by my concerned loving partner I sought professional help. On my journey I have really looked at who I am, I have come closer to knowing what my true passions are and how the healthy me responds to life. Through research and meditation I have found 100% belief that I have a spirit, or soul, a spark of energy that drives and motivates me, it is completely unconditional love, it gives and gives, it is always there, it cannot disappear or be taken away. I have 100% belief that you also have the spark. So, to the question I ask myself...am I 'reacting' to a situation from an unhealthy mind or, am I responding to life from my loving spirit and calm mind that is free of conditioned thinking??? I think of the mind as a curtain in front of my spirit. I practice awareness that I am making this choice between reaction and response, I tell my self that I AM THE BOSS OF MY OWN MIND, I will take responsibility for making a choice and it will be the RIGHT choice, to forget the useless emotion of the mind that comes from uncontrolled thinking, to use my intelligent calm mind with the power of motivation and unconditional love. Respond...from the heart. Please don't think I have perfected this, that I have arrived anywhere, this is a practice, not a destination! To practice responding from the heart has helped me a lot so I thought I should share. Comments welcome. Love to you all! Jack

white knight Judging other people
  • replies: 1

I have a dear mate that has serious PTSD issues and is under heavy medication. Yesterday he posted on social media that he has great fears because a few doors down from his home new neighbours have moved in. These people "wear scarves and the men smi... View more

I have a dear mate that has serious PTSD issues and is under heavy medication. Yesterday he posted on social media that he has great fears because a few doors down from his home new neighbours have moved in. These people "wear scarves and the men smile at you all the time". He was, as he elaborated later refering to Australians with Arabic origin. After much thought overnight I replied to his entry. I reminded him of the worst firestorm in Australian history 'black Saturday' where neighbours of some residents that disliked each other for whatever reason helped each other and saved each others homes, their lives and in some cases...while their own home burned to the ground. I've been human also and in the past prejudged my neighbours only to find after some time they were the ones that came to my aid when a suspicious vehicle surveillanced the area. Then such neighbours became good friends. My point here is, many mental illness sufferers have issues with other people. It can be the sole reason why we "lock ourselves away", keep distant or are merely reserved. People can be hurtful, destructive and cunning. Some of us cant brave the bullying to just laugh it off. We are marshmellows and hence will never be walnuts with a hard protective case. I'm one of these people that have been hurt many times. I'm vulnerable mentally. It has naught to do with physical might- I don't lack there. When verbally challenged, time is my only friend. I simply cant get over the hurt easily and quickly. So what is the answer here? Well the likes of my sensitivity and fragility, walls need to be erected. There is no other solution but to erect these walls of defence to "minimalise" attacks...Better to erect walls with limited contact than hiding fully behind them with over reaction. You might be in this situation. Well for this exercise my walls have grown over many years. I have a wall when visiting the main street of our town.The wall is: meet a local I know, talk for only 2-3 minutes. Enough time to be courteous but not enough time for personal challenges eg "when are you going to come to this meeting...you have to be more active in our community". Another is a local knock on our door seeking support for our local politician "I'll certainly think about it" is my answer. Non committal. I don't have to commit then have it thrown back at me "you said you'd support us". Erecting small walls is ok if it means we can survive without locking ourselves away fully.

Cathazard Coping mechanisms
  • replies: 2

Hello everyone, I hope we're all coping well... I wanted to ask about everyone's way of coping with overwork. I'm currently working my first full time job and ive struggled with bipolar my whole life. I feel like I'm not coping with the work load and... View more

Hello everyone, I hope we're all coping well... I wanted to ask about everyone's way of coping with overwork. I'm currently working my first full time job and ive struggled with bipolar my whole life. I feel like I'm not coping with the work load and although I'm not depressed yet, it could easily go that way. I'm really anxious and work odd hours during uni semesters to be available to take my little autistic brother to a night class. It means I only get one day off a week which is really wearing me out... im getting super emotional, I sleep my free time away and I dream constantly about being at work. I'm just tired... financially I can't afford to cut back my work load so I'm going back on my anti anxiety medication but I was wondering if anyone is in a similar situation and can offer some advice on how they cope with it all? Thank you! CH

thisaquarian Being kind to yourself
  • replies: 3

My grandma takes a cup of tea (with a saucer) back to bed to read the newspaper. My partner sleeps in. I go for the occasional massage, or have a bubble bath with candles and relaxing music. When times are tough, how do you show kindness to yourself?... View more

My grandma takes a cup of tea (with a saucer) back to bed to read the newspaper. My partner sleeps in. I go for the occasional massage, or have a bubble bath with candles and relaxing music. When times are tough, how do you show kindness to yourself? How do you pamper yourself?

thisaquarian How do you manage binge or comfort eating?
  • replies: 12

Hi everyone... I've tried to look through the topics and couldn't find a thread so thought I'd start one... I have had a very abusive childhood and life has been tough for me... how I dealt with this was emotional/binge eating. Now as an adult, thing... View more

Hi everyone... I've tried to look through the topics and couldn't find a thread so thought I'd start one... I have had a very abusive childhood and life has been tough for me... how I dealt with this was emotional/binge eating. Now as an adult, things are different for me but I still emotionally/binge eat. As a result I am extremely overweight which is causing several other health issues... For instance this morning I was so anxious at going back to work that I ate enough for 4 people for breakfast. The thought of going into work to deal with other people's problems when I am so overwhelmed with my own was too much for me this morning. After I'd finished eating I pulled myself together and thought logically. I'm stressed out at the moment, about many issues, and I'm not dealing with any of them. So I called in sick, torn between feeling guilty and my feeling of being overwhelmed. The latter won obviously... I phoned the work EAP and had a phone session and I'm seeing my GP soon.. and made myself a little list for the day of things to achieve. Earlier though I was feeling guilty about missing work so I binged a little, but have managed to pull myself together to come to the forums... I'm 34 now, and have been emotionally/binge eating for most of the years I have been alive. It seems like a viscious cycle - food was always my comfort and reassurance. I'm trying really hard to come up with a list to turn to instead of food... 1. Coming to the BB forums to chat, and actually interact with others going through a similar thing. 2. I have started a social fitness group - I organised something last weekend then couldn't actually go cos of a family thing! This weekend it's all systems go though! 3. I want to learn how to crochet so I was thinking of joining a group for that. I've tried to learn online but it's getting nowhere. 4. Letter writing 5. Going for a walk even if it's for 10 minutes Also there's an awesome thread to "resist the urge" sorry I can't remember the name, which had some awesome strategies... but I wanted something specifically for food related issues...

blueangel What keeps you motivated?
  • replies: 3

Hey all What keeps you motivated to keep going when your anxiety/depression gets the best of you? For me, it's my dream of becoming a doctor and my dad.

Hey all What keeps you motivated to keep going when your anxiety/depression gets the best of you? For me, it's my dream of becoming a doctor and my dad.

Raia SIMPLE THINGS TO KEEP YOU GOING
  • replies: 3

I find that morning exercise works wonders for me, listening to music of my liking, much needed pampering and most importantly eating well "I love my yogurt and fruit" and a good nights sleep. Not to mention maintaining social supports. How about you... View more

I find that morning exercise works wonders for me, listening to music of my liking, much needed pampering and most importantly eating well "I love my yogurt and fruit" and a good nights sleep. Not to mention maintaining social supports. How about you? What keeps you motivated to keeping healthy in overcoming depression and anxiety?

sumynona423 How do you manage? Staying well questions
  • replies: 4

Have reached a bit of a rough spot in my life. Wanting any advice/tips/methods on the following topics, hopefully others can relate to these same issues as well. How do you distract yourself? Do you read? Play an instrument? Draw?Write? How do you re... View more

Have reached a bit of a rough spot in my life. Wanting any advice/tips/methods on the following topics, hopefully others can relate to these same issues as well. How do you distract yourself? Do you read? Play an instrument? Draw?Write? How do you resist temptations? How do you mange your anger? How do you calm yourself down from panic or stress? How do you boost your self esteem? How do you get off to sleep? (preferably without medication) What are your triggers and how do you cope with them? How do you keep in touch with others? If you can answer any of these it would be greatly appreciated.

Sawyer Study Tactics
  • replies: 4

Hi everyone, It's exam time at University, a time which often exacerbates issues like depression, fatigue and disorders due to the immense pressure placed people, particularly young people, to do well. I thought this might be a good opportunity to st... View more

Hi everyone, It's exam time at University, a time which often exacerbates issues like depression, fatigue and disorders due to the immense pressure placed people, particularly young people, to do well. I thought this might be a good opportunity to start a thread on ways to stay focussed and calm during these times so you can not only study effectively, but avoid the extremely unhelpful panic attacks. Feel free to post here asking for others strategies, saying what works for you, or what works for others. I myself, find it extremely helpful to light a candle at my desk, quit out of distractions like facebook, and listen to long compilations of music. I find a style of music known as chillstep to be particularly good for studying. It's kind of like modern day meditation music, for me, it gives me enough stimulation to remain seated at my desk without procrastinating, while not being as distracting as listening to my itunes (which has all my favorite songs). Furthermore I often found traditional meditation music just makes me drowzy, especially if i've been studying for a long time. I also personally really like playing a compilation of 'rain sounds' at the same time, mix the levels right, put my big headphones on and the whole world just seems to disappear beneath hours of successful study. Let me know what you think, or if you have any strategies that work for you. Regards, Sawyer

Sawyer Psychological Exercises for Anxiety/Depression
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, For those of you who don't know, I have experience with anxiety disorders and depression both as a psychologist and as an individual. I detailed a method for dealing with those downward spirals that are accompanied by anxiety, panic, rac... View more

Hi everyone, For those of you who don't know, I have experience with anxiety disorders and depression both as a psychologist and as an individual. I detailed a method for dealing with those downward spirals that are accompanied by anxiety, panic, racing thoughts, problematic thought patterns. This was something I really struggled with personally and figuring out a way to combat this was massive in getting me where I am today. This is a good mental exercise you can do when you start feeling anxious, the thoughts start to speed up and you feel like you are losing control. Try to find a quiet place and imagine an object in your head that you are familiar with and that isn't a trigger for you. For me this was often a soccer ball, but theoretically you could use anything. Try to focus on that object, start with the overall shape, draw it in your mind, and then slowly add detail to it. Whenever you feel problematic thoughts creeping back in, refocus on the object, relax and breathe. Then you can begin spinning the object in your mind. Try to make it spin faster and slower. See if you can stop it. This is a very difficult thing to do because of the way our brains are wired, and will require practice. You may find that you have difficulty focussing, but that is the whole point! the exercise is about putting you back in the drivers seat of your mind. You can also try doing a task that requires very fine motor skills and concentration. For me this was playing piano, painting, or when I didn't have access to these things, even simple motor skill tasks using my hands, like spinning a pen between my fingers. The science behind these two tasks is that it serves the dual purpose of being cognitively draining (thus leaving us with little brain power to ruminate, put ourselves down, and worry) and by making us focus intently on something unrelated to what is upsetting or stressing us. It might not be easy, and you may have to really focus and be persistent with these exercises. Those negative thoughts will fight back. But when I applied them, I found these tasks to be hugely helpful, as have many others. You just need to have to will to try and implement them. Let me know if either of these work for you, if not, let me know why and I'm happy to discuss alternatives that might suit you better. Hope everyone is having a good day, Sawyer