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Just_Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 686

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

Kazzl Helpful books and resources
  • replies: 103

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, sp... View more

Hi everyone Members often refer in their posts to books and other resources that have helped them. This thread is a place to list those books so all members can find them easily. The titles might include scholarly, mass market and self-help books, specialist websites or blogs, podcasts, vodcasts or print or online journals or magazines. Please note BB has a list of websites and resources under Get Help, so maybe check there first for online resources. (Also note that we cannot include live links to online resources.) To make things easy to find, please put the category of the content first in bold, then the title of the book and then, if you want, a brief comment. Please note that anything listed here reflects the member's views only. Publications and other resources are not necessarily endorsed by beyondblue. Happy reading!

Chris_B Worried about other users - how are we all doing?
  • replies: 43

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences... View more

Hi everyone, I thought I'd check in to see how everyone is doing; while the nature of these forums is as a place of support, and it feels good to help others, we need to make sure our own welfare is looked after too. Sometimes reading the experiences of others can be validating, because we feel 'we've been there', but sometimes it can also be a trigger for bringing up unpleasant feelings. I've started this thread so we can have a constructive discussion about helping others and helping ourselves - how do you cope when you read about others in distress? Do you have a self-care plan in place, and if so, what is it? Really looking forward to hearing from you all.

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Doolhof Three things to be thankful for today
  • replies: 4601

Some days it is really hard to find anything to be thankful for when we feel overcome by the darkness and fog of depression. If I look hard enough, I can find something to be thankful for. I would like to encourage others to write down three things t... View more

Some days it is really hard to find anything to be thankful for when we feel overcome by the darkness and fog of depression. If I look hard enough, I can find something to be thankful for. I would like to encourage others to write down three things they are thankful for, and to realise there is a sense of hope available to us all. Sometimes it is just a little hard to find! So my three things for today are: 1: The lovely singing of birds in the morning as they welcome in the new day 2: The ability to read and write 3: A lovely hot shower. Wishing all the "family" in BB Land a day full of noticing the nice things in life. Kind regards to you all, from Dools.

ecomama Three self-care things you did today!
  • replies: 1266

We can do it BBers, we can do self-care. Sleepy21 pointed out research that shows self-care REALLY helps! Please share what you do for self-care so we can get inspiration, ideas and motivation to do it too. Best wishes EM

We can do it BBers, we can do self-care. Sleepy21 pointed out research that shows self-care REALLY helps! Please share what you do for self-care so we can get inspiration, ideas and motivation to do it too. Best wishes EM

Clues_Of_Blue Minimalism and creating a peaceful space
  • replies: 93

My parents are both hopeless hoarders. When I first moved out of Mum's house many moons ago, I marvelled at how much space I had in my tiny little unit. It was a new experience and I loved it. Even so, with me not being inclined to take up the torch ... View more

My parents are both hopeless hoarders. When I first moved out of Mum's house many moons ago, I marvelled at how much space I had in my tiny little unit. It was a new experience and I loved it. Even so, with me not being inclined to take up the torch of the hoarder, I managed to accumulate a lot. Sentimental bits from my younger days, gifts, free stuff I thought I was just too poor to say no to - could need it later, and not be able to afford it, right? There were also bills and sensitive documents I just didn't know what to do with, and boy do they pile up over the years! And worst of all, relationships - when you live with someone, they bring in their own lifetime of clutter, oftentimes leaving a whole bunch of it behind when they leave. And again related to being poor, if any money came my way I wanted to treat myself. A book, or an article of clothing was often the go to. Guess who had a bunch of books she never read and clothes that didn't get worn. When I parted ways with my most recent ex, he left an extraordinary tonne of junk behind. I made it my mission to get rid of it, and along with it anything of my own I didn't want any more. I had gifts I neither used or particularly liked, boxes of books I bought with the thought I should get them while I had money to read when I didn't (they moved - along with the sensitive documents - from house to house in boxes that never got opened), even clothes from when I was a teenager (those suckers never gonna fit again, and they sure aren't in style any more). In the course of trying to find more and better ways to pare down all this stuff sucking the life out of me, I discovered there were a whole heap of other people who thought like me and wanted what I wanted. Minimalists. There are articles and blogs and tonnes of inspiration out there, and they helped me immensely. I've been on the journey for a bit over four years, and it took most of that time to get my home how I want it. But now I can easily find things I want to use and don't have to clean, organise or maintain half as much stuff. I don't feel compelled to buy things on a whim or to feel good, because I just don't need them - I'm actually repelled by the idea of having more objects around me. I now have much more time and space and peace. I thought that worth sharing. What a fantastic tool it's been for looking after my mental health!

blondguy Do You Like Yourself? Your Thoughts are Welcome!
  • replies: 3906

Hello Everybody and new posters especially:-) I have had anxiety since 1983 and depression from 1997. There is always someone that says 'You have to Love Yourself' before recovery. When people are suffering from anxiety/depression this may be the las... View more

Hello Everybody and new posters especially:-) I have had anxiety since 1983 and depression from 1997. There is always someone that says 'You have to Love Yourself' before recovery. When people are suffering from anxiety/depression this may be the last 'advice' they really need. This is only my experience when I am 'advised to love myself' to rebuild my life. I have heard the following from people that cant 'love themselves' which is fair enough as I am a person that cant either. Your thoughts will help me and others learn from your point of view. I can only be 'gentle' to myself to heal...not love. Why should I love myself if I dont in the first place? I am in a dark place, how can I love myself? I dont deserve to love myself I am depressed...How can I love myself? I have mega anxiety attacks..what is there to love about myself? I hate myself and what I stand for...why should I? I love my partner more...I will care about myself 'later' When people have depression/anxiety/denial they dont need to be counseled with ' love yourself'. Thats a huge ask. I dont need to climb Mt Everest by trying to love myself when I cant. It can be an unrealistic and even silly target to achieve having depression I just prefer to be 'gentle' to myself. Same results and way less stress Your thoughts/opinions are more than welcome Thankyou so much Paul

zenny I don’t really know what is wrong with me
  • replies: 2

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I know that whatever i have going on with myself is not healthy. I overthink every little thing in my life. I hate myself. I have so much anxiety about my future and the pressure that my family has on me isn’t help... View more

I don’t know what is wrong with me. I know that whatever i have going on with myself is not healthy. I overthink every little thing in my life. I hate myself. I have so much anxiety about my future and the pressure that my family has on me isn’t helping at all. I actually don’t even know if its the pressure i put on myself overthinking or its actually real. There is moments where my heart feels like its in my throat and I can’t swallow. I have this sinking feeling that everything will go to shit. I think everyone hates me. Every time things go wrong i don’t know why i want to harm myself. I am such a people pleaser and i hate that. How do i know what is wrong with me.? I have so many things going on and all i feel is uncertainty and stress. I just wish I didn’t exist. I am writing this because my hands my mind just feels so weird. I cried a little before this. I had a few important things to do today and i’ve been anxious the whole day. I just feel so weird so sad so out of place i wish things were better but i never do anything to make it better i only like to sleep and sit on my bed why is life so exhausting what is wrong with me?

sbella02 Are you a morning person?
  • replies: 11

Hey all! Wanted to start another thread to encourage people to share great tips and experiences with each other, specifically about waking up in the morning. I've never considered myself a morning person (quite the opposite), so I'd like to pose a qu... View more

Hey all! Wanted to start another thread to encourage people to share great tips and experiences with each other, specifically about waking up in the morning. I've never considered myself a morning person (quite the opposite), so I'd like to pose a question to anyone who loves mornings or thrives in the mornings, what's your go-to routine? Is there anything that you can't go without doing when you start the day, or anything that you absolutely swear by? For some people, I know that spending time and effort on skincare is of the utmost importance, or making a hearty breakfast, or going for a walk/exercising, etc. I'd love to hear people's experiences. What are your morning secrets that set the tone for a fantastic day? SB

ecomama What makes you smile?
  • replies: 17

I would LOVE to read about what makes you smile. At a push you can share what makes you laugh too! Whatever circumstances have brought you to BB, many of us are dealing with MH concerns.Sharing our healing journeys can be so amazingly helpful to othe... View more

I would LOVE to read about what makes you smile. At a push you can share what makes you laugh too! Whatever circumstances have brought you to BB, many of us are dealing with MH concerns.Sharing our healing journeys can be so amazingly helpful to others, it's priceless. Yesterday I felt JOY for the first time in a long long time. It happened while watching my grandchildren make huge bubbles at an Art Installation. Joy felt good but quite alien tbh. Today one of my children said she belly laughed for the first time in maybe a year, a funny thing happened at work. Depression, as with other MI's, sucks the joy out of us. Our goal could be to quieten these invaders by filling our lives with more joy. Please share what makes you smile. Love to youEM

Paw Prints Staying/Getting/Doing Well – Moving goalposts or fixed target?
  • replies: 468

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when ... View more

Hi, this is my first post, though I have been reading the forums for some weeks. I’m probably expressing myself badly when I say that I have found reading about other people’s journeys reassuring. Finding a community of people who “get it” even when they have a wide variety of experiences and lives lived is not something I thought I would ever find. Though people talk about getting well & there is a section Staying Well, I’m curious as to what this actually means to other people and how they manage their expectations. I noticed some people refer to being well as ‘being like themselves before they got ill’, whilst others don’t express an exact aim. My idea of being well has changed over the years. I was first diagnosed as an 8 year old child back in the late sixties. The doctors told Mum that the voices in my head & the sudden crying bouts were because I suffered from ‘nerves’ & I was given meds to calm me. Of course such things were not discussed back then & I was told not to talk about it to anyone, not my school friends nor siblings, just Mum. For decades after my idea of being well simply meant being able to hide my illness from others. A number of events in my life caused my illness to worsen, until some years ago I became so ill I needed to be hospitalised for my own safety. This lead to my current diagnosis of Major Depression, Anxiety & PTSD. I’m no longer in that dark place, but each day is still a battle (though I can now believe in a future). For now only my siblings & one friend know about my illness, though some things they still don’t know. So, what does ‘being well’ mean to me, it is ever moving goalposts. If you had asked me 5 years ago would I be as well as I am now I would have thought it impossible as I couldn’t envision a future. If you had asked me last week (during one of my down periods) I would have said my progress was all an illusion & I was fooling myself that things can get better. For now my idea of being well is being able to believe that things can change for the better, that I will one day be able to manage the everyday things like housework, caring for myself & caring for my dog & maybe, just maybe I will even be able to enjoy myself. Paw Prints **I took the tip to give myself time to write my post by writing on a word doc & then paste it.

ecomama Who else likes gardening?
  • replies: 972

Hi everyone I hope you're staying well today. Who else likes gardening? I would love to connect with people here who are happy to share their gardening adventures. For me I know that gardening helped heal my soul during tough times. I hope it will ag... View more

Hi everyone I hope you're staying well today. Who else likes gardening? I would love to connect with people here who are happy to share their gardening adventures. For me I know that gardening helped heal my soul during tough times. I hope it will again. Then with other things going on, it became a jungle. I'm part way into rediscovering it again and doing A LOT of hard yakka atm, when I am motivated. I have new dreams and ideas to put into the many bare places, as I remove thickets of lantana etc. This will all be on a tight budget and I'm ok with that. I want to create a peaceful place where I can be. I would like to grow food again (tell 'er she's dreamin' atm lol). I would like to re-establish my worm farms and compost heaps. Autumn is such a beautiful time of the year in the garden. I'm 'alone' in my gardening journey and would love to share and hear about other's gardening antics. Hopefully we can troubleshoot any issues in our gardens and talk about any healing we're feeling too. There's a lot of knowledge we can share. I hope this thread can brighten your day! Love Ecomama Please

Guest_322 Tips on frugal living (for the financially struggling)
  • replies: 27

Hi everyone, So I thought it would be helpful for anyone who (like me) is financially struggling to share tips and tricks on how to make a dollar stretch that much further. I was inspired by Dizzy and her wonderful advice on anther thread. Here are m... View more

Hi everyone, So I thought it would be helpful for anyone who (like me) is financially struggling to share tips and tricks on how to make a dollar stretch that much further. I was inspired by Dizzy and her wonderful advice on anther thread. Here are mine: 1. Do the bulk of your shopping at Aldi (it's a LOT cheaper than Woolworths or Coles for the most part). 2. Wait till the afternoon/late evening to stock up on bread at supermarkets as the prices are often heavily slashed. 3. Your freezer is your best friend to keep cheap/discounted groceries that you buy in bulk. 4. Plan your meals to save money and avoid waste. 5. I understand that obviously you can't always do this but (& always check with your doctor/pharmacist first) see if you can ask for the generic brand of meds. 6. If you live with other people, you will probably eat better if you all chip in. 7. Markets and op shops are great for updating your wardrobe. 8. If you live in an inner city suburb, see if there's a not-for-profit local food co-op to get really cheap veggies and fruit. 7. If you're a bit of a TV junkie, Netflix is a lot cheaper than Foxtel. 8. Many (phone) service providers offer $10-$12 vouchers for cinema movie tickets. Use those to save at the cinemas. 9. Candy bars at the cinemas are notoriously expensive. Buy your snacks from a supermarket. phew...that's all I have for now. I WOULD love to hear your tips! Thanks in advance! Dottie x