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I'm gay
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Hi Rusty123, welcome to the site where we do have discussions with all types of people, whether they are straight, gay, lesbian or bi, it makes no difference, you're still human like everyone else, we all have family, friends and work.
I've known guys who have been friends to come out and tell me about their sexuality, it doesn't change anything about them, I don't dislike them, why should I, they're the same person and the topics we talk about are no different, so don't be afraid.
Take it at the speed you want it to happen.
Geoff.
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Hi Rusty123, you can't hide how you feel because that's worse than anything else.
Real friends won't care a bit and those who discriminate against you aren't friends at all.
Geoff.
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Hi Rusty, it must be terrible to keep yourself hidden this way and to fear you won't be accepted for who you are. Geoff has offered some great support, he is right. Your real friends will not reject this side of you, not at all. In fact you might be surprised how accepting people are. My brother in law is gay and waited until in his late 30s to come out. We all suspected though, and even tho his side of the family is very macho, boys don't cry etc., when my BIL did come out they all just said 'ok'. Not a huge deal at all in the end. But for the many years preceding when he pretended to be straight he suffered anxiety, depression, stayed in unhealthy relationships with women (not surprising), was on medication etc. had to suffer through set up after set up with women he of course would never find happiness with. Now he is happy and truly his real self. He's not afraid to dress/act how he wants as he was before, because he feared being 'detected'.
I hope you do tell people and feel a weight lifted off you. Good luck.
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It doesn't sound like you're really comfortable with labels, that's fine. All the messages we get in society tell us that being gay or bisexual is not 'normal', and there is strong social encouragement to not be either of those things.
Attraction is a complicated thing. You can feel sexually attracted to men but prefer romantic relationships with women. When it comes to your attraction, you can be attracted to both men and women. From what you're saying, you've been involved with men too much for there to be no attraction there.
It sounds like the main thing you're lacking is love and respect, and not seeing your kids must be hard. What do you want to happen next?
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I feel that I not attracted to men or have any sexual interest in men, it like when i depressed i feel comfort thinking about being gay but in reality i cannot bring myself to it, if I ever got ask to engage in any sexual activity with a man I get to scared and say no, I seem to question my sexuality when I depressed or on mind altering drugs that increases my depression.
When my mood is good i never think about this, I went through some sexual abuse with men that have left scares i guess and never will fully recover.