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MsPurple LGBT+ members - got a question - need somewhere to start - here is the place
  • replies: 219

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations H... View more

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations Here you can ask questions about anything from questioning your sexuality/gender identity, coming out concerns, dating, mental health etc. If you are an ally (an Ally is a person who considers themselves a friend to the LGBTQ+ community) you are also welcome to come here to be a support to our community and ask questions as well. This is a supportive place for people to discuss their questions and concerns, we are not a place of judgement. As Thumper from the movie Bambi said "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all." If you are looking for a more social and light hearted conversation might I suggest joining us on the thread under BB social/rainbow cafe. Copy and paste the link: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/bb-social-zone/let's-chat-about-anything Feel free to introduce yourself below and ask any question/s I thought I'd answer one common question in the intro post and this is one I have heard a lot. What do the letters mean? When referring to the community it is shortened to LGBT+ as there are more letters than just the 4. I have put some of the common ones here: Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Transsexual Two-spirited Queer Questioning Intersex Asexual Ally Pansexual Agender Gender Queer Welcome everyone and hope to see you around on this thread and around the BB forums MP

Chris_B IMPORTANT: Information and guidelines for posting in this section
  • replies: 0

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe spa... View more

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe space to talk about how issues relating to gender identity and sexual orientation impact on mental health and wellbeing. 2. This includes discussion of and support around chronic illnesses such as HIV which disproportionately affect gay, bisexual and other men who have sex with men. 3. As this is a safe and affirming space for LGBTIQ individuals, please note this is not an appropriate space for debating the "rights and wrongs" of homosexuality, bisexuality, or gender fluidity itself. This includes use of terms such as "lifestyle" and "choice". 4. This sub-forum is and always will be a safe and supportive place for LGBTIQ people concerned with what we all need to do to stay well. That said, others are welcome provided they respect that this is primarily a LGBTIQ space. 5. If you do not identify as LGBTIQ, or are not currently supporting someone in your life who is LGBTIQ, and are curious about aspects of sexuality or gender identity, please read through beyondblue’s resources for and about LGBTIQ people here to educate yourself rather than posting in this section.

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mxllxe_ I think I'm bisexual and I really need help
  • replies: 2

I'm a 14 year old girl, and for the past few months I've begun to seriously question whether I'm bisexual. I've identified as straight for my entire life until recently, but I'm struggling to be sure of what my sexuality actually is. I haven't told a... View more

I'm a 14 year old girl, and for the past few months I've begun to seriously question whether I'm bisexual. I've identified as straight for my entire life until recently, but I'm struggling to be sure of what my sexuality actually is. I haven't told anyone yet, and I don't think I'm ready to tell my family or friends as I think it's too early and I'm not 100% sure (also my dad is Christian so I'm worried about that). I decided to come here instead because everyday I can't stop thinking about this and it's taking over my daily life. I feel like I'm more attracted to boys, but I think that I might have some interest in girls as well. Like I would love to go on a date, and even have a romantic relationship with a girl, but when I think about my future family life (marriage, kids, etc), I would rather have it with a boy? Yes, I have felt attracted to the same gender recently, and I think I may be slightly developing a crush on my bisexual friend (girl), but I'm so confused right now. I would really love some help in finding out who I am so that I won't have to continue feeling so anxious and confused about this, thanks.

Tails91 Married 3 kids
  • replies: 11

Hi all, I’m soooo lost and have been for s few years I’m sexually attracted to women and have been my whole life had a few girlfriends in my younger days but now married and have three children I really struggle in the bedroom with my husband I’m try... View more

Hi all, I’m soooo lost and have been for s few years I’m sexually attracted to women and have been my whole life had a few girlfriends in my younger days but now married and have three children I really struggle in the bedroom with my husband I’m trying my hardest and do it maybe once a month if that to do the right thing by him but I really have to build myself up to it and I feel terrible but I seriously just not sexually attracted to males any more I I don’t think I can pretend anymore but wen it comes to women I’m all for it I’ve never ever cheated and never will but wen I think about women n kissing them and snuggling with themy guts go crazy n it turns me on. But I’m terrified to come out cause my family won’t accept it and i don’t want to hurt my husband even more then I do knocking him bak sex everyday I used to love it and say I did bysexual but i think it more then that now it’s like the more he hints m asks the more I can’t do it it’s like it pushes me away 5 kilometres more I don’t no wat to do or how to get my sex drive bak for him I’m sooooooo confused n stuck in s hole right now and it’s makinh my depression n anexity worse

ThatGuySunshine Am I Transgender or do I have Body Dysmorphia?
  • replies: 6

Hi! I'm a 20 year old female and for around 6/7 years now I've been thinking that I should have been born male, before this I haven't felt uncomfortable being a girl and I still don't hate the fact that I'm female. Though when I was younger I was a '... View more

Hi! I'm a 20 year old female and for around 6/7 years now I've been thinking that I should have been born male, before this I haven't felt uncomfortable being a girl and I still don't hate the fact that I'm female. Though when I was younger I was a 'tomboy', I was interested in toys more aimed towards boys and I loved to play soccer with other boys but when I turned 11 I was told that I couldn't play sports with the boys anymore and had to play with the girls so I just stopped playing altogether. After that I started to gain a lot of weight and at the start I hated being overweight but over time I became very comfortable with my weight and never really had the desire to lose any of it as I wasn't at such a weight that it risked my health. In my teens I started to develop a more masculine appearance, cutting my hair and wearing clothes from the men's section etc., and I love being called a guy, it was also during this time that I really wanted to have a deeper voice more like a man - especially since I sound like a 5 year old girl. At the time I didn't think very much of it as myself being transgender felt wrong(?) despite my desire to be a man or as close as possible to one, I've also thought that the reason I might think I should have been born male is because when my parents were going through their divorce my sister blamed me for it, she said that the reason I was born was because my father wanted a son but ended up having another daughter which left him unhappy, I have confronted my father about this but he denied it profusely though I feel that her words have had a strong effect on me. Within the last two years I've started to want to change my body to be slimmer and athletic but the body I want is a man's body, I've been confused about whether I just don't like my weight or want to be a man so a few weeks ago I bought myself a binder and when I wear it I feel amazing and great, I love having a flat chest even if it makes my stomach stick out more, but to make sure I'm not confused I've decided to lose weight and then start to build muscle to see if I'll be satisfied with that but the more I exercise and lose weight, the more I want to be a man. I want to tell my family how I feel but I'm a very private person and find it hard to share my feelings with anyone, especially when I'm not sure how they'll react, I'm also scared to know if I am trans because my father is very transphobic and I don't want to disappoint him anymore than I already have.

Static I’m married with kids and just figured out I’m a lesbian
  • replies: 6

Whinge alert! I have been married for 10 years and have 2 young kids. Most of my life I have considered myself mostly straight but being a good catholic kid I never actually explored anything. I never felt overly passionate about my husband but I lov... View more

Whinge alert! I have been married for 10 years and have 2 young kids. Most of my life I have considered myself mostly straight but being a good catholic kid I never actually explored anything. I never felt overly passionate about my husband but I love him and we got a long really well. Over the last 2 years a lot of depression, me wondering if this is all there is etc. the last year has seen all that spike along with a complete rejection of religion, shame and the acceptance of being bi+ and constantly swinging between expressing myself in feminine and masculine dress. I figured being bi is ok, cause I’m not lying about wanting to be with my husband Now though I think I might be gay, or at least bi though heavily attracted to the feminine. And so many things clicked into place I just don’t understand how I got to this age and am only now figuring it out?! It’s not like I’ve avoided gay culture, I’ve always been mildly obsessed with it since I was a kid but didn’t think about why. And worse then that, how do I tell someone who loves me that I’ve messed up so bad. Me coming out doesn’t only affect me. How do I navigate this with the least fallout, especially for him and the kids? And then what if I’m not gay just confused?! Help

Gabi-cd Confused and depressed
  • replies: 2

I have been a closet cd for the past 33 years,, grew up in a very religious family and parents are still that way. This upbringing has led to more confusion within myself. My first marriage fell apart and this is partly to blame for it and I have thr... View more

I have been a closet cd for the past 33 years,, grew up in a very religious family and parents are still that way. This upbringing has led to more confusion within myself. My first marriage fell apart and this is partly to blame for it and I have three kids to think about. My current partner is accepting to a certain degree but is so far unwilling to tell anyone in her family (worried about being judged) which I do respect but This makes it hard for me to dress as I want around the house as some live with us. im not sure how I identify. Best way I can describe it is when I look at my male body, I don’t want to get rid of anything. But I feel like something is missing and the only time it feels right is when I am wearing my beastforms. i have come out to some close friends (usually when drunk)but I’m too shy to even speak to dr about it. i hate wearing or shopping for male clothes but too shy to shop in stores for female clothes by myself as I feel I will get judged and for being out of proportion and not able to try the clothes on.. i quite often have days days of just waking up depressed and no “normal” reason for it except I put it down to identifying who I am if I had to identify as anyone it would be a bisexual trans woman but not sure if that’s even the right terminology sorry for my ramblings but it’s hard to get my thoughts straight let alone live the life I think I should. probably more I should include but as I said can’t get thoughts straight

brooked I think I’m lesbian
  • replies: 4

I’m 30 years old and have recently realised I might be lesbian i work on a mine site and a female medic came to site I fell in love with her. I have never really experienced this feeling before but think I may have always been attracted to woman! I w... View more

I’m 30 years old and have recently realised I might be lesbian i work on a mine site and a female medic came to site I fell in love with her. I have never really experienced this feeling before but think I may have always been attracted to woman! I was sexually abused by a male as a child is this why I might be lesbian? I’m so confused and don’t know how to deal with these feelings and scared of what others may think

Olly128 Depressed and angry
  • replies: 4

I'm hoping for some advice. While I've come to terms with being gay I'm really struggling seeing my straight friends and gay friends all starting to partner off. While I've dated I feel like I've never found the right person and am always rejected by... View more

I'm hoping for some advice. While I've come to terms with being gay I'm really struggling seeing my straight friends and gay friends all starting to partner off. While I've dated I feel like I've never found the right person and am always rejected by the kind of guy id like. I feel this is stretching into my life where I'm constantly angry to the point where my friends no longer want to spend time with me as I'm so prone to snapping. Does anyonw have suggestions for this I feel like to an extent it's self loathing and while I've seen a counsellor for my anxiety and depression I feel like I'm just going around in circles.

risingangel I NEED HELPPPP!!!!!!!!!
  • replies: 5

All my life i have dated guys (boys), and for TWO years i have been questioning my sexual identity because i don't know what i am, like some days i think girls are hot but i don't know if i would date one. All the girls at my school are straight and ... View more

All my life i have dated guys (boys), and for TWO years i have been questioning my sexual identity because i don't know what i am, like some days i think girls are hot but i don't know if i would date one. All the girls at my school are straight and they say ewww if they know someone is Bi or Les. I feel like im either Bi, or straight but i dont know what one, Im having trouble with it. Im too scared to talk to my parents about it too so i turned to you guys since i know you guys can help and support me. Any help or advice?

SP123 I'm Bisexual and I'm struggling at home and at school.
  • replies: 1

I'm a high school student, 18 years old, and in year 12. I came out as bisexual to my close friends almost 3 years ago. While they have greatly supported me I've been struggling with accepting myself. I don't like being different than my friends and ... View more

I'm a high school student, 18 years old, and in year 12. I came out as bisexual to my close friends almost 3 years ago. While they have greatly supported me I've been struggling with accepting myself. I don't like being different than my friends and dealing with my sexuality has caused me a lot of stress. My grades have been suffering and because of this my Dad get frustrated with me. I feel a lot of pressure to improve, and I know that a big part of my suffering is due to stress and difficulty of accepting my sexuality. I don't want to talk to my parents about it because I don't want to have to come out. I know they're accepting of gay people, but I'm not sure how well they'll take it (especially my Dad) knowing that they have a gay son. School's become hard because of this and home life is more stressful. I just don't know what to anymore.

javixo Support group for single gay men
  • replies: 3

I am an early 40's single gay man of immigrant background and I live in Sydney. My biggest disappointment from the last many years is that I have failed to find a community of like minded individuals, a community that I feel I belong to and people I ... View more

I am an early 40's single gay man of immigrant background and I live in Sydney. My biggest disappointment from the last many years is that I have failed to find a community of like minded individuals, a community that I feel I belong to and people I feel connected with. And I have tried so many different options that ended up being just social events where I would meet people I saw only once. I wonder how many single gay men, in particular those like myself who suffer from episodes of loneliness and envisage themselves being single forever, would like to share their views or even reach out via this forum.