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MsPurple LGBT+ members - got a question - need somewhere to start - here is the place
  • replies: 219

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations H... View more

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community. A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations Here you can ask questions about anything from questioning your sexuality/gender identity, coming out concerns, dating, mental health etc. If you are an ally (an Ally is a person who considers themselves a friend to the LGBTQ+ community) you are also welcome to come here to be a support to our community and ask questions as well. This is a supportive place for people to discuss their questions and concerns, we are not a place of judgement. As Thumper from the movie Bambi said "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all." If you are looking for a more social and light hearted conversation might I suggest joining us on the thread under BB social/rainbow cafe. Copy and paste the link: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/bb-social-zone/let's-chat-about-anything Feel free to introduce yourself below and ask any question/s I thought I'd answer one common question in the intro post and this is one I have heard a lot. What do the letters mean? When referring to the community it is shortened to LGBT+ as there are more letters than just the 4. I have put some of the common ones here: Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Transsexual Two-spirited Queer Questioning Intersex Asexual Ally Pansexual Agender Gender Queer Welcome everyone and hope to see you around on this thread and around the BB forums MP

Chris_B IMPORTANT: Information and guidelines for posting in this section
  • replies: 0

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe spa... View more

The Sexuality & Gender Identity space is a sub-forum within the wider beyondblue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual, transgender, intersex, queer or questioning (LGBTIQ) a safe space to talk about how issues relating to gender identity and sexual orientation impact on mental health and wellbeing. 2. This includes discussion of and support around chronic illnesses such as HIV which disproportionately affect gay, bisexual and other men who have sex with men. 3. As this is a safe and affirming space for LGBTIQ individuals, please note this is not an appropriate space for debating the "rights and wrongs" of homosexuality, bisexuality, or gender fluidity itself. This includes use of terms such as "lifestyle" and "choice". 4. This sub-forum is and always will be a safe and supportive place for LGBTIQ people concerned with what we all need to do to stay well. That said, others are welcome provided they respect that this is primarily a LGBTIQ space. 5. If you do not identify as LGBTIQ, or are not currently supporting someone in your life who is LGBTIQ, and are curious about aspects of sexuality or gender identity, please read through beyondblue’s resources for and about LGBTIQ people here to educate yourself rather than posting in this section.

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Gardevoir Gay Teen at an All Boys Catholic Private School
  • replies: 5

Hello everyone, im pretty new here just needed some help or advice kinda. So here i go. When i was in year 7 i new i was gay and i new that was bad, gay was obviously a common insult and got thrown around a lot so i stayed under the radar. This one k... View more

Hello everyone, im pretty new here just needed some help or advice kinda. So here i go. When i was in year 7 i new i was gay and i new that was bad, gay was obviously a common insult and got thrown around a lot so i stayed under the radar. This one kid in my class always talked about how disgusting gay people were and how they were all going to hell, in religion when we had to present a slideshow on "the power of love in the bible" he put a bunch of pictures of two men kissing with big red x's through them, obviously this didn't help my self esteem. Eventually i grew tired of this and one day i told a relatively close friend in class that I was Bi, I figured that being Bi wasn't as bad as being gay and i would be accepted more. Nope. It was pretty hard and I didn't help at all with my flaunty gay attitude, soon enough everyone was finding out about the Bisexual kid. Eventually i got sick of it and just started correcting them to "gay" because I didn't want to lie anymore. Now everyone knows me as the gay kid. I'm in year nine now and i'm still the gay kid, I do Debating, Public speaking, I play Piano, I do drama, I also play soccer and I play basketball, all of these things are activities that i enjoy, but i want advice on how to be less known as the gay kid and more of who i actually am.

Married_bi_guy Married guy
  • replies: 5

Hi I'm married to a beautiful lady. Before I was married I had a good amount of bisexual experiences. Now I'm starting to crave it again. I'm hooked on gay porn and always look at other guys. I've even downloaded gay apps. I don't know what to do View more

Hi I'm married to a beautiful lady. Before I was married I had a good amount of bisexual experiences. Now I'm starting to crave it again. I'm hooked on gay porn and always look at other guys. I've even downloaded gay apps. I don't know what to do

eeva235 My Husband Didn't Make Me Happy
  • replies: 2

My husband didn't make me happy, so we divorced. He didn't make me feel loved, appreciated or valued. I complained that he was always working late and when he wasn't working he was asleep. I complained that he didn't wash the dishes, he left his clot... View more

My husband didn't make me happy, so we divorced. He didn't make me feel loved, appreciated or valued. I complained that he was always working late and when he wasn't working he was asleep. I complained that he didn't wash the dishes, he left his clothes on the floor and he never made the bed. I thought my husband was the source of my unhappiness, and just maybe, if we got divorced, I could be happy again. Simply put, I blamed him for my unhappiness. So after two short years of marriage, we separated. Yes, we still loved each other. And no, nothing catastrophic happened. No infidelity, no gambling, and no abuse. It was simple: We just weren't happy. But what in the hell is happy and how did we lose it? Did we ever even have it? Given that we left our marriage for it, it must be pretty important. But honestly, I had no clue what happiness really was or how to get it. So I started on my own personal journey to happiness. So, please anybody help me or give me some suggestion.

TheoWulf Tips for a gay, hopeless romantic
  • replies: 5

Hello, world. I've grown into high school as a hopeless romantic. I'm constantly longing for some form of relationship, as I have a couple of friends who fell in love and it's made me kinda jealous. However, my big problem is that I'm gay in a Christ... View more

Hello, world. I've grown into high school as a hopeless romantic. I'm constantly longing for some form of relationship, as I have a couple of friends who fell in love and it's made me kinda jealous. However, my big problem is that I'm gay in a Christian school, meaning my sexuality is kind of against what the teachers and the school overall says. Plus, I'm only two years into teenagehood. What should I figure out first? Am I mentally ready to start something? How will my friends react? Theo.

Zi Don't know what to do anymore
  • replies: 3

Hello, I am trans non-binary 29 years old been out about it for the last 2 years of my life. I think it's fair to say I hate my life so much everything is just pain... So I'm am finding it very hard to be around my family. It's not like there not sup... View more

Hello, I am trans non-binary 29 years old been out about it for the last 2 years of my life. I think it's fair to say I hate my life so much everything is just pain... So I'm am finding it very hard to be around my family. It's not like there not supportive or anything it's just clear they don't understand me. I know should be happy that they accept and support me but I find myself stuck between identifies with them. It's at a point now where I can't help but feel so much pain and loneliness just by been around or thinking about them. So what does one do? How can I stop feeling like this or at the very least not to be alone anymore...

Paul Out of the closet?
  • replies: 8

Many of us find that coming out and sharing the hidden part of ourselves to be a major relief. Some of us find that sharing this part of ourselves is met with negative reaction or abuse. Coming out is sharing part of who you are. Whether it's gay, bi... View more

Many of us find that coming out and sharing the hidden part of ourselves to be a major relief. Some of us find that sharing this part of ourselves is met with negative reaction or abuse. Coming out is sharing part of who you are. Whether it's gay, bi, trans or any of the diverse sexualities or gender expressions. We share a fundamental part of who we are. Sexuality and gender are expressed in almost all of what we do as members of society, not just in the bedroom and in who we love. Below I raise some questions, feel free to answer them directly or just tell us more about your experiences. Have you come out and if not, are you thinking about it? What was the experience like, or what do you think the experience will be like? How do you feel within yourself now and if you're not out, can you imagine how you would feel if you came out? If you're out, what advice would you give to other GLBTIQ people? What would you like to say to straight people about coming out? Please feel free to tell us your coming out story and if it affects your depression/anxiety Paul

Rural_nsw Bisexual?
  • replies: 4

Been married for 8 years and the other day my wife found gay porn on my phone, I never gave it much though looking at gay porn, just did it without thinking about what I was thinking, now I did a silly thing and denied I was looking at it and fobbed ... View more

Been married for 8 years and the other day my wife found gay porn on my phone, I never gave it much though looking at gay porn, just did it without thinking about what I was thinking, now I did a silly thing and denied I was looking at it and fobbed it off as a virus on my phone (don't think she believes it though) we haven't spoken about it since but I've been thinking that I believe I'm bisexual or curious at least. I don't know I'm all over the shop at the moment

Brin209 Oh please don't make me name this thing...
  • replies: 4

Where to begin... I'm trans, been in a relationship 4 years with my male(ish) partner. My family are religious. Support from them is there but shallow, they can't be seen to support me by their faith. My sister is getting married soon, and I'm cut up... View more

Where to begin... I'm trans, been in a relationship 4 years with my male(ish) partner. My family are religious. Support from them is there but shallow, they can't be seen to support me by their faith. My sister is getting married soon, and I'm cut up that she probably won't acknowledge that I'll be there. I'm unemployed, looked after by my partner. No quals, no exp in anything I can return to. We are struggling to keep on top. The sherriff has already tried to evict us once. I have anxiety. It's been getting less manageable. I feel worthless and isolated. I live regional. Been 6 years, but I managed to finally get a job, big company. Employment has changed though, I got a blister 2 days in, and was bullied into quitting by the manager. Considering my previous experiences, I'm afraid to apply for any more jobs. I've been bullied out of every job I've had. It's not cos I'm useless or braindead or entitled. It's just I have autism spectrum, and anxiety. When people interpret my mistakes as an attitude problem, they come down on me. This makes me stressed, and I lose the ability to not be an idiot. Then I become vulnerable... I've been bullied and gaslit and all kinds of awful stuff. Last night I had a dream I had a baby. Obvsly an impossible thing but its something that pops up from time to time. I'm worthless, I'll never be a parent, I'm too scared to even try. But in the dream, I was lying in a bed, covered in blood and crap and holding a newborn. My family all ignored me, wouldn't even drive me to the hospital, felt surreal. And now, my partner is going through the first steps to transitioning. I was kind of prepared because ppl who have gender issues gravitate to us. I support her, but it's a journey I know all too well, and I'm actually really afraid for her because I don't know how to support her. Noone really supported me. And I have to get over internalised transphobia I ignored because I don't actually value myself. Now someone I love is trans. Something I'm worried about is how weird being in a lesbian relationship will be, and how my parents and siblings who were kind of supportive before might think this is a step too far. Will I even be invited to my sister's wedding at all when this gets out? Panic attacks have been getting worse, I wake up every night after a nightmare. Really feels hard to breathe right now. Its affecting my health. I don't care if this doesn't get a reply, felt cathartic just to write it. Thanks.

Tired_of_being Husband gay but in denial. How do I help and survive this?
  • replies: 41

I guess my title says it all. My husband, best friend and person I knew has finally faced up to years of cheating. While floored by the betrayal of monogamy and the trust issues, I want to know how I can help him. This is doing my head in. I don’t ca... View more

I guess my title says it all. My husband, best friend and person I knew has finally faced up to years of cheating. While floored by the betrayal of monogamy and the trust issues, I want to know how I can help him. This is doing my head in. I don’t care about the sexuality, but the lies and hurt he has caused has stripped my confidence and self worth to 0. We live in small country area and he is widely known (also all his mates know as he has tried it on with some of them). He keeps saying he loves me and wants to stay married, we don’t have sex or intimacy. But he has cheated with only men and our gay friend believe he is gay not bi. Ive looked for somewhere to be supported and help my husband through this. I know our marriage is ended, but this should not have to end badly. How can I help him, while ensuring my anger at the betrayal of trust is reined in? We are both around 50, kids, etc.

Hawken Been with a man for 7.5 years but Think I'm into girls
  • replies: 3

I've been with a man for 7.5 years now. We have 4 children together and over the last few years I've lost all attraction to him. I obviously live him and can't tell him this because I'm so scared I'll hurt him. I picture myself with women, sex is hor... View more

I've been with a man for 7.5 years now. We have 4 children together and over the last few years I've lost all attraction to him. I obviously live him and can't tell him this because I'm so scared I'll hurt him. I picture myself with women, sex is horrible because I don't enjoy it, it feels obligatory. I've never been with a woman other than a date kiss in high school. I'm 26 and always just assumed I was straight but now I don't think so. What do I do? How do I know? How do I bring it up with him?