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Why is life so cruel

Community Member
I can't recover from my break up. Its been a year since the man I loved so much left me for another woman. Its killing me. We were together 16yrs life was amazing we had an awesome tight loving family. Our kids were the happiest kids. We all loved life every memory is an amazing one right up until he left. He threw me and our family our hopes our dreams our future away like trash.

Now he hates me won't talk to me and has our kids apart of his new life. He doesn't care for me at all. Doesn't care that I'm struggling to raise his kids. I already suffered anxiety now I'm suffering deep depression along with physical effects from stress etc.

Life is hard I have no family to help me. My kids are suffering behavior wise from their dads sudden departure and then being thrown into his new life. I can't take it anymore. My kids are all I live for but it hurts so much sending them to him and hearing how amazing their lives are while I'm broken so bad.

I see no future anymore my days are dark. Its hard to even fake smiles for my babies. I find it hard to get up and do even what needs to be done. I hold back tears when attending school events my ex and I were so involved in their schooling now he couldn't seem to care less he has them for one and s half days then sends them home.

He won't talk to me at all so he doesn't seem to ask about anything that's going on with them. He won't help with money either he cries poor but yet my kids explain a different version. He knows how expensive kids are but yet tells me through other people like I said he will not even talk to me on the phone he has no job so no money so can't help. So I have major financial worries on top of everything else.

I really don't know how much more I can take. Everything goes wrong to nothing but bad thing after bad thing has happened all year like car breaking down fridge blowing up no air conditioner kids have missed out on excursions the list goes on. How some one could turn so incredibly cruel I will never understand all I done was love him. He chose someone else why does he have to hurt me so much. He's hurt his kids so much to and all that seems to matter to him is his new gf new life and her kids.

I'm seeing psychologist on medication doing what I can to get better but I feel like I'm drowning trying so hard to keep my head above the water. But I'm so tired exhausted unhappy I'm just about ready to give up
2 Replies 2

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi broken, welcome

Ive been a broken dad, so I know where you are at.

Lets see if we can tip the scales a little.

Children are resilient. If they have your live and care they will adapt to situations. So please stop worrying about them.

Your ex isnt working. Stop please thinking how well off he is financially. His lavish lifestyle could be because if his girlfriends income which has nothing to do with his responsibilities. Try to remove your thoughts about his new life.

His decision to not talk to utou is his decision. His must have reasons. We only get one side of a story. Try eriting a short letter asking uf for the kids sake they have a short friendly chat over the front gate on visitation drop off. Your kids will smile.

pick up part time work. Set goals.


Topic: the best praise you'll ever get- beyondblue

Topic: never ever give up- beyondblue

Topic: the balance of your life- beyondblue

Topic: depression and motivation- beyondblue

Good luck and repost anytime. Your posts help others in distress

Tony WK

Hi BF.

l'm so sorry for this mess and like wk l've been through it myself too and still am.

Do you see your kids wk , can you pop in and read the last bit in my thread , feel like l'm going crazy, l could use all the dads l can get right now.

BF , you can talk here and get it all out , l have to think about it all and maybe come back with some ideas , but l'm so sorry for this.

WK's idea of talking over the gate is a beauty too , even if only a quick hello. Me and my ex have stayed good riight through mostly , although she keeps pulling new stunts and l constantly have to watch out for my daughter and remind ex of her bs and how it will effect d.

her latest is that l should pick d up from down the road and not from the house her and the new man live in. MAkes me puke, l'm still figuring out how to tackle her about it without it all blowing up , kid gloves .

yet she was the most over motherly mum we knew , man is this all the back flip of the century.

So sorry for your kids , l wanna go hit him over the head with a brick.

l'll drop back later.