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The Love of my Life

Community Member
One month ago the love of my life left me. I was going to ask her to marry me. Only a month earlier we missed out on a house that we wanted to buy. I'm lost, I love her and her children dearly. They completed my family, as I have three children of my own. We were making plans for our future and our children. We both work in high stressful professions. 
12 Replies 12

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Trust and Care,

I am so sorry to read your story. I don't have any advice for you, I am just acknowledging your pain and suffering. This is no doubt a very difficult time for you.

If you need to share more of your story and how you are feeling, this is a safe place to do so.

I hope you are managing to look after yourself. You are probably going through a time of grief and loss which may take some time to work through.

If you are confused by how you are feeling and think you should be over this by now, then look up Grief on the net and discover there is quite a process people go through when they are grieving a loss.

Take are of yourself, from Mrs. Dools


Community Member

Hi there Trust & Care


Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for being able to share your letter on the other thread that you commenced.  I thought I’d reply to it here, to try and keep all the posts/responses together.


It’s a lovely letter, well written and is also deep and revealing.


Do you intend to send it to her;   or did you write it simply to  get something off your chest and out of your system??


Kind regards



Thank you for your response Neil. I posted my hand written letter to my love this morning. 

Thank you Mrs Dools

I have been down this path before, when my ex wife left me. Five and a half years later I am grieving again.


Community Member

The letter I posted today (this morning) that Neil refered to.

Dearest Leanne,

How are you going? I hope you and the boys are doing well. I want you to know that I deeply love you and the boys from the bottom of my heart. 

Upon reflection, I hurt you and disappointed you and I'm deeply sorry for this, as it was never my intentions to hurt or disappoint you and the boys. I wanted to grow old with you and support you in raising Asher and Reece. You had every right in leaving me. I let you and the boys down.

I allowed the stress and pressure of work to destroy my confidence, spark and spontaneity for fun and love. Instead of discussing the problems with you, I bottled them up, wrongfully releasing the negative energy towards the ones I love. 

Weekdays are for work and once work is over it is time to focus on family. Weekends and evenings are for family, fun and laughter. Be it cooking dinner together or playing with the children, but most importantly supporting, understanding and caring for each other. It is important to do romantic gestures, like weekends away, but the little things are just as important and add up. Being a family and doing family things together; family gatherings, picnics, swimming school, little kickers, movies, reading stories, playing games, walks and much more, add to the whole experience of a loving, caring, supportive and understanding relationship and family. 

I wasn't there for you and the boys when you needed me. Please accept my heartfelt apology. You mean more to me than anyone else does. You are the one I love.

Maybe after you have had some time away from me, you will want to talk to me again. Remember the happy times we had together, like the happiness we experienced while completing an Italian Cooking School together, or the holiday we had with the boys at Coffs. Even the cheeky times we had where you placed your toe prints on the windscreen. I will always be here for you and the boys, regardless of our personal situation at present. My love.

Love, Scott.

Ps... There has been an exciting turn for the better to occur in the last week. Strange how things happen. 

Hi Scott,

This is a beautiful letter! It is so well written. I do so hope your lady can read this with an open mind and heart and at least get back to you.

My husband and I came very close to splitting up just before Christmas. We have decided to try harder to make changes that will help us both.

I do so hope your lady makes contact with you. If she does, then please try to listen to her and be aware of her needs as much as your own.

If you do manage to reconnect, then I suggest you just take it slow. Your relationship will never be the same as it was before, it will be slightly different.

Please take care of yourself and if you need to talk with someone because you are feeling really down, then please do so. There are phone help lines available if you don't have mates who understand.

Wishing you well with your letter.

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools


I trust that our relationshipn will be stronger for this experience.

Hi Scott,

Have you heard from your lady friend at all? Maybe in a week or two if you have not heard from her, you could follow up your letter with a card telling her you are thinking of her.

I do so hope things work out for you.

I invited my husband to join me for lunch on Monday in between the old dears I was looking after. He managed to complain about a lot of stuff over lunch and I wondered why I had bothered to make us a date!

Then I decided I could not change the way he behaved, but I could change the way I reacted to his behaviour, so I decided to enjoy myself, to agree with his complaints, as it was easier than disagreeing, and enjoyed my meal.

I'm not saying that we should agree with others opinions all of the time, but when it is just a very minor issue, does it matter if you like that dressing on the potato salad or not!

Wishing you well Scott, from Mrs. Dools


No word yet. But then she would've only receive the letter today. It is also her eldest son's birthday today, so she would've been busy for the last two days.

Thank you for the advice, I am an easy going person normally, but at the end of last year I had the wind knocked it oh me at work. We never argued, I just got a little anxious.