Struggling with recent separation

[Mitch_D]

Hi,

I have had a separation quite a few months ago and I am still not feeling very good about it and I feel as though it is getting worse.

It was a big separation carried out over a long period and my partner was unfaithful. We tried to get passed it but couldn’t.

We were engaged, bout a house 18months before the break and a dog so I was fully committed. We were also moving interstate at the start of next year which she is now doing and she also bought me out from the house and has the dog and I feel quite isolated and empty.

I thought it would pass and since the break up we had been communicating a bit and got together a few times and I felt comfortable with her again and had strong feelings.

Now I feel quite angry when I think about her and things that had happened and I am sad and unsure what to do. I am not happy with my job and the move interstate was going to be a bit of a fresh start.

Now I feel as though I want to move away as there are a lot of triggers around. I have felt like this before and it has passed but this time it is hanging around and getting worse and I am having a lot of trouble to feel any desires in my life and it is a bit scary for my future.

I am hoping to get a bit of advice on things that can help.

[Doolhof]

Hi Mitch.D.

I'm sorry for the situation you are in and also sorry it has taken a while for someone to respond to your post here. This is certainly no reflection on you or your situation, the forum sometimes gets busy and posts move onto the next page.

Hope you are still connect to the forum and receive this reply.

Relationships can be difficult to deal with. We do invest our time, money, feelings and thoughts to other people. We make plans and set goals we hope to achieve together. It is hard when one person wants to leave.

Are there things that you enjoy doing in your life? Can you add more of those into your days and weeks to help you feel better about your life?

Sometimes we need to work hard at what makes us happy, not relying on other people to be there for us, and finding a balance of letting others in as well.

Can you find ways to make a fresh start? Is there something completely new and different you can try to add a new spark into your life?

Is it possible for you to get another dog or will that just upset you more? Maybe there is a dog shelter near you where you can volunteer some time if that is the case?

Would you consider having a chat with a support worker at Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636. They have helped me in the past.

Hope you are still connected here and yo may have read other posts similar to yours that might have provided answers and suggestions for you.

Regards from Dools