Strict Parents

[Azz77]

I've been struggling from depression and anxiety, everyday seems miserable and it's like my life is stuck on repeat. I can't handle my parents anymore and i don't know how to cope, they're the type of people to get a drunk a lot meaning they go out a lot so they're barely home, and once they come home it's not pleasant. I'm always stuck believing that all the stuff they say is true and that they really don't want me and would be better off without me, they're not my biological parents but i've been living with them for a long time, I'm nearly 16 and home is like hell for me and ik i don't have it as bad as others. But I can't keep living like this anymore, i'm constantly told that i'm a crappy child and don't care what they have to say, when I barely say anything at all nor do anything that is classified as being disrespectful, i constantly get into arguments with my parents, constantly told that I am breaking both of them apart and it's all my fault. I'm not allowed most things teenagers have and do most days of the week, and every time I go hang out with my group of friends i'm always told that they'll bring me undone, most of my group consists of girls and two boys, and my parents can't see past that, i'm constantly being told that the girls in the group will ditch me when they get a chance and won't have my back when I'm in need of help, i'm sick of being told these things I'm so sick of being told that I need more male friends as I'm a boy and I have to leave my friends to find other ones, i'm so sick of living at home and so sick of the lies i'm constantly being told, nothing ever good happens around them. I'm constantly told to smile and I just can't fake it anymore, I can't keep being told that they don't need me and if I don't like their rules the front door is right there. My curfew is 5pm, and I'm not allowed out if they can't guarantee they can get me home because they'll be drunk and that's so annoying how they can't do something for their son for once. I also have a job and i'm threatened that I'll have to resign because they don't like the hours I work and they can't pick me up sober from work. How do I live with parents that control more things than I've stated and crap talk me to their friends when I don't do anything sinister? Like sure i've done things they don't like but I keep in mind what I am and am not allowed to do and I don't break their rules but I'm constantly told I do...

Thanks for reading, hope you have a fantastic week

[Sophie_M]

Welcome Azz77,

Glad you joined us here! We're so sorry to hear that you're struggling at home with strict parents. It sounds like a really tough situation, and you aren't being spoken to respectfully. We understand that this must be quite painful and feel overwhelming. Please know that you don't have to go through this alone, there is help available to you. We would strongly recommend that you get in touch with Kids Helpline - https://kidshelpline.com.au/  It sounds like you're in a really tough situation and it might help to talk it out whenever you're feeling overwhelmed. Kids Helpline counsellors can be contacted 24/7 via telephone and also via webchat if you go through the website provided. They might have some advice for you which could improve the situation.

If you are interested, we would also recommend getting in touch with an organisation called Headspace. Headspace is an organisation specifically for young people aged 12-25 and they offer a wide range of services. They also have a group chat on their webpage, which could be a good place to meet people going through similar experiences. Thanks again for reaching out as we know that it can be really tough to do this for the first time. Hopefully a few of our members will reach out to you here over the next few days to relate.

[Jstar49]

Hi Azz,

you sound like a very responsible young person and your parents sound like self indulgent idiots!

do you think you could sit down and talk with them, or maybe the one you get along best with, at a time when they’re sober? Tell them how their drinking is affecting you?

I know if my child spoke honestly and openly with me it would make me stop and think about my actions.
hang in there! Hopefully something improves the situation soon.
cheers

J*

[Azz77]

Thanks for the response

I've tried to sit my parents down in the past and had a chat with them about how their behaviour towards me when they're drunk is very hurtful and nobody should have to be spoken down to in such a way that they are constantly feeling degraded. They didn't take it well, they didn't hear me out, and they told me they weren't going to change the way they are and do things around me just because I don't like it.

Thanks again for the reply and I'll have some more faith for the future

Kind Regards

[Azz77]

Thank you,

I will definitely give headspace a try and contact kidshelpline for further ideas on how to cope. Thank you so much for your response and giving me a new place to address my concerns and feelings.

Kind regards