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Pressures of parenthood
Not sure how all the other Dad's and parents are feeling right now but I am increasingly having thoughts of 'failing', letting my kids and wife down, and just feeling generally overwhelmed and anxious.
I am so blessed to be part of a loving family but I catastrophise about loss and letting my family down. I know I'm far from alone. As they say, a problem shared is a problem halved. Not sure if anyone else wants to share or give this some space. One thing that is worrying me is work life balance and being a 'present' father
Hi Rufusb and warm welcome to our community
It's great you've found your way here and you will find many supportive and friendly members.
Yes, you are so right parents are feeling it tough at the moment, as are the kids I'm sure. But failing, how can this be? The virus is not your fault. Those thoughts and feelings of being overwhelmed are natural. Many, many people are experiencing those exact same things. What's happening is something no one has experienced before. There is so much that is unknown - this causes fear, that turns to anxiety and depression. It is a process that happens. Being aware of this can help to turn what you are feeling around. Acknowledge you are fearful, accept that, accept you are not responsible for it.
Catastrophising is something people with anxiety often do. Me being one of those people. What am I doing now to reduce this - being present in the here and now. Do you know about mindfulness? This is a really good time to practice it.
I'm sure you are not failing at all, especially since you've written here. That shows me you have an inner strength to help yourself and family through this. Turn around some of those negative messages you are telling your self. See the good things that are happening around the world. People coming together (virtually) and making things happen. People are showing how resilient they really are. I'm truly inspired by all the positive things I'm seeing on YouTube. If you get a chance in your busy life - have a look at "Playing for Change - The Weight", "Playing for Change - Stand By Me".
You say One thing that is worrying me is work life balance and being a 'present' father well, this is hard I know. All the additional work required must make things extraordinarily difficult, not just for you, but many. Maybe one way to manage is, to say this will pass. Not next week or the week after, but it will and then I can give my kids a special treat and will be 'present' more often. Maybe even make a pact with them - how does that sound?
Not sure if any of this will help you Rufusb. Others will be by to give you their thoughts too.