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Romy
Community Member
I'm 20 years old, in my second year of uni. I feel like I have lots of acquaintances, I can always talk to people at uni easily. However I feel like I don't really have anyone I would actually hang out with outside of uni or work. I don't have a group of people I can go out and party with, I only have about 3 seperate friends I could think of, and even then I don't hang out with them often and it feels so hard to organise things when people have different schedules. I just want to know if this is normal. I feel like a loser and I don't want to be the girl who only hangs out with her boyfriend. I want some gal pals!
2 Replies 2

demonblaster
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Romy

You certainly don't sound like a loser darl. Sounds like you have a lot going for you, bonus being able to talk easily to people, many struggle to be able to do that.

It can be tricky organizing around schedules, maybe you could do coffees to start with your 3 friends or individually at different times with them and later do the nitelife when youse can all work in.

What about asking some of your acquaintances at uni if they wanna boogie. Another option although you may not know them as opposed to Uni acquaintances could be to use a notice board for outings at the Uni you'd probs get a few responses.

What subjects are you doing at Uni?

Like to hear how you get on ☺

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Romy, I remember at school our classmate/friends were much different than being at uni, the companionship was much closer, we would be in class with each other most of the day, while at uni it's totally different because we might only see a couple of people once or twice a week and that's only for an hour or so, which means the relationships aren't the same.

You can change this by asking a person you get on with about many issues, if you do the same then suggest an idea for the future that will keep this friendship together.

My distraction was being in love with a girl who wasn't my g/friend but someone else's and the three of us always spent any spare time together on weekends mostly and eventually we were married.

I think all it needs is to be confident, listen to what they have to say, involve yourself in their conversation and hope they will want to do exactly the same with you.

Those who aren't interested in what you want to say may still support you, however this will depend on whether you want a leader or to be on equal terms, this can fluctuate.

Geoff.