New here, feeling strange

[Kezia_Katherine]

Hi everyone,

I’ve just joined this group and am interested in knowing other people’s thoughts.
My partner of 8 years (and father to our son) has just started meds for anxiety and depression. This is after months or possibly years of not really enjoying anything, and eventually feelings of extreme lowness. Everything came to a head a few weeks ago. Amongst other things, my security and confidence in our relationship has been shattered. Now that he has been diagnosed and has started medication, I feel some relief, however am feeling very anxious myself. This is ultimately what I’m posting about; I don’t feel like myself. I feel consumed with concern for him and what he’s thinking, and how he sees our relationship. Because I’m anxious I feel I am being unnatural, and boring. I have nothing to talk about, and when I do, I feel like I’m trying too hard. I’m worried he has doubts about us, and that is is exacerbated by me being a shadow of my former self.
He has started seeing a psychologist alongside his gp. I am speaking to an individual counsellor and we are seeing a couples’ counsellor. I’m thinking I’ll talk to my gp about possible meds for myself to get me through this time so I can function more normally, and try to have fun with my son.

Thoughts? Thanks in advance.

[Betternow]

Welcome Kezia

You will discover that many people reading these pages have battled anxiety and depression so you are in reassuring company.

I'm sorry to hear that your partner went undiagnosed for so many years. The medications are not a magic bullet but they can certainly relieve the worst of the symptoms and give a person time to regroup. They can take up to 6 weeks to be fully effective and adhering to the dosage regimen is critical.

You certainly have been under some serious distress while all this has been working out. Often prolonged distress can bring anxiety symptoms to the surface. Feelings of nagging worry, restlessness, intrusive thoughts, a tendency to assume the worst outcome and sometimes a feeling of confusion and what is known as derealisation. Often understanding the symptoms and signs of anxiety (and that you are not going mad) can offer some relief. Also if your partner shows noticeable improvement, I wouldn't be surprised if your symptoms settle down too.

I'm glad you are going to see your GP. Medicare do offer GP ordered mental health care plans that entitle you to ten visits with a psychologist. Your GP may consider medication but don't be surprised if he/she considers them unnecessary at this stage. The good news is that non drug treatments can be very effective at managing anxiety and the burden of anxiety is not necessarily a life sentence. Look at me, I've suffered from anxiety for forty years and I can still enjoy life.