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Mummy to a large family..

Utbh
Community Member
Im new here. Im a wife and mum. I have 5 beautiful children. I'm normally a happy go lucky, fun mum. But lately everything is getting to me, I cried myself to sleep last night I don't exactly know why but i think its because I feel I'm constantly being judged and the past couple of weeks has been one problem after another.. i know it will get better and hopefully I will feel better, it just sux right now.. anyone else with large families, that find it a little overwhelming sometimes..
7 Replies 7

Just Sara
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi and welcome Utbh to BeyondBlue forum;

It's great you've had the courage to seek help and look out of the box here on BB. I hear your frustration and sadness thru the page.

I'm not the mum of a large family, but I am a mum who's had some pretty awful and traumatic things happen. Crying into your pillow is healthy...yes, God knows how difficult it can be raring a family especially with 5 kids.

Time for you is so important. Mum's get lost among the daily tasks and responsibilities where we seem to blend into the background. It's a balancing act of sorts. I used to go out in my car late at night to cry and vent. Having a bath used to help too. Solitude would be hard to find I bet in your house.

Having someone to talk with like your husband, a friend or neighbour, or ideally a GP/counsellor/psychologist might help to begin with. Lifeline and BeyondBlue Live Crisis Chat Lines are excellent ways to find someone who's there just for you.

At the bottom of this page are info links where you might find something in line with your issues. In your community there might be a group of mum's like yourself, or support groups for women attached to the hospital or community centre. It's worth having a look-see.

For me? I used to invite the ladies from my neighbourhood over for coffee. We all ended up giving each other time out now and then, though not all neighbours were this friendly. I hope you have someone in your corner. Does hubby help out so you can catch a movie or walk in the park? (Either alone or with him?)

On this site, we care. We're here to listen and give you space to be who you want to be and say whatever it is that ails you, or makes you feel better. Have a look around our threads because there might already be someone similar to you who 'gels' with your situation.

I wish you well and congrat's on creating your own thread. Keep in touch and vent your little heart out if you feel like it ok?

Sara (Hugs)

mudjimbaboy
Community Member
Welcome.and thanks for posting. Im Max. I just read your post. Mums are very special.they take care of GODS people. Kids. So i rank them very high. And i hope you do too. So please dont ever think your not important enough.you are. I have two daighters. Theyr big girls now and im a bit proud theyr doing well. But when it was tough .i sometimes felt overwhelmed. Worries.relatipnship mostly .it made me doubt. I was.worried thats all.as a parent its normal.please dont think every emotion you feel isnt normal. But if your ever feeling down. Get o line.until you have some face to face support. Hope i helped. Im Max.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hello Utbh, boy having 5 children must put a great deal of pressure on you, times that are enjoyable and certainly periods where it's all too much.
If you like it would be great to hear back from you, and I know that you have said that hopefully it will get better, and so do we, but at this point you are finding it to be very difficult, so I hope that we are able to help you. Geoff. x

Utbh
Community Member

Thanks for the replies guys.. Today is a new day.. Im okay today, I could be better, but im okay.. even before your replies i felt the cloud shift a little, i went straight to sleep..

See I'm a listener, I'm not much of a venter.. I think just accepting Im feeling overwhelmed made me feel better, weird eh..

Hubby does okay, and my kids are my world all five of them.. my problem is im a proud woman, i dont ask for help even though deep down i know i could do with some.. But I still dont and I still get by..

In regards to time out for myself, a trip to the shop with no kids is like a holiday to me.. so no, i dont get much time out and i get through this by reminding myself my kids wont be at home forever..

Anyway being a school day, I have a 100 things to do.. again thank you for replying and confirming its okay to feel bad.. I will be okay! X

Just Sara
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

So great to hear back from you Utbh!

It's amazing to also see you're back on track. Well done! I know you say you're waiting around for your kids to grow up, but now's the time you need to make a date with yourself each week. The little episode you had could be your mind letting you know something's on the rise.

Please keep who you are at the fore; put the oxygen mask on yourself before the kids and hubby ok? You are your biggest supporter...

Lovely to hear from you again...Sara xo

anxious97
Community Member

Utbh, you seem like an awesome mum!

You remind me of my mum...strong, kind hearted and caring.

Your husband and children must be so proud of the amazing person you are.

keep going xx

Utbh
Community Member

Thank you for your replies again guys..

Sara you seem like a very wise woman.. its true I need to get back to me sometimes, but with my youngest being 2 and oldest being 8 its hard.. I do things for me and tag them along, if that makes sense.. like going to the beach, i love the water (and am lucky to live 5 mins from there) so the kids get to play and i get to relax, also enclosed parks with a cup of coffee.. very much my thing..

And anxious97, thank you I do try my very best.. I didnt have that so i promise my Kids that i will move mountains for them.. sometimes hard, sometimes overwhelming.. but it can be done..

Thank again everyone. If any of you ever feel like a chat Im always available..

Enjoy your hump day xo