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I don't have a partner/spouse, so I thought I would just welcome you to the forum. I think your post is in the right place.
Wellcome to our forums!
Im sorry you are feeling this way.
Im sorry you feel down most days, have you thought about talking to your gp about the way you are feeling?
Is your husband aware of the way you feel around his friends?
Maybe your self and your husband could just go out the two of you to celebrate his birthday.
Hello Goanna, I'm not sure you're alone in how you are feeling, especially if they're big drinkers and you're not and what they say and behave like are not for everyone as the day/night continues.
The concern is how you and your husband are feeling because if you are both unwell mentally, then one feeds the other in how they behave, talk and act every day, encouraging the other to feel down along with them.
Are you able to front up to the bbq for 5 or 10 minutes, then you may have satisfied your husband and then if you decide you can go home, it's just the brief appearance from you, if however, it's going to be too difficult, then don't go.
Another option to consider besides this is to think about getting the help you and your husband need because from what you have told us there is much the two of you need to talk about with someone who is trained, as there seem to be several issues that need to be sorted out.
If you like you can talk with us as it's best we don't indicate these problems unless we actually know.
Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums. I am sorry for what you going through. I can see that you are feeling tired and helpless.
Have you told your husband about how you have felt? Communication is really important and i am sure he will understand.
Stay safe and i am here to chat if you need me.
Im feeling like I need to get some counselling to help me through these issues with my husband. I think I need some support in coping with supporting my husband with his chronic pain. Thanks again for your support, I felt quite lost in my own head yesterday
Anytime, Goanna. If there is more you'd like to talk about, we'll be here.
Warm wishes, & Happy New Year.