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Community Member

After all these years of dealing with all that life throws at me and being bi polar, it's just now that I feel lonely. Suddenly, almost 50, with kids that are reaching teenage stages meaning they do their own stuff a lot, I finally feel what it's like having no friends. Dealing with the (very few) ups and mostly downs mental states on my own and still has to put on a smile at work.

Loneliness has lifted it's ugly head and it hurts.

7 Replies 7

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Oz1969

Welcome to the forums and good on you for having the courage to post too!

Im 57 and have the loneliness factor happening as well and it can be a dark place to be in for sure.

Just out of respect and letting you know I have had clinical depression for 21 years but have managed to do well at work. My social life has vaporised over this time and its a major pain.

Your post would have taken a lot of guts to write OZ. I joined the forums in January 2016 after falling in heap.
There has been so many super kind people here that have helped me out more than I expected.

The forums are a rock solid private place to post whatever you choose to post. You will never be judged here as its not what we stand for.

I am still on my own with a 25 year old daughter that lives on her own.I understand where you are coming from Oz. I feel your pain

Thanks for being a part of the forums. You are more than welcome to post as much as you wish

My kind thoughts for you Oz1969


Community Member

Hi there,

I think maybe after all this time you have given yourself to your kids you need time for yourself. Time to re-generate, re-energise. Perhaps look at what you may want to do. Holiday plans perhaps. You have probably been so busy that now you feel like everything is standing still and you can't find direction.

I often imagine myself standing on a chair or on top of a mountain, looking down at my life. Trying to figure out what next? Assessing situations from the view up top. Making deciyfrom up there. Things seem to be clearer when I look at my own life from a different perspective.

Hi Oz1969 Apologies for hijacking your thread......Just welcoming Poetry to the forums 🙂


Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Oz1969 -- Welcome to the forums.

I feel your pain. I am 54, divorced, and 4 (now adult aged offspring) and few friends about. I think there are two types of loneliness that hit us.

  1. First is the kind most people are familiar with, not having a partner. It sometimes makes us feel unloved; even though our children still do.
  2. Second is the kind where we have few to nil friends to share our day/week with. The acquaintance at the pub, just doesn't fill that gap. We need someone who takes an interest in us, and our lives... and it's friends that often fill this role for us.

If anyone has the answer for point 1 above, I'd love to hear it. But for point 2, maybe this will help:
Consider joining the local Rotary, Lions or Freemasons club. They all provide a social atmosphere, where you can see the same people at every meeting. Where you work together for a common goal and interest, and most importantly, develop friendships with people who actually care how you are today.

Hope this helps

ps: Welcome Poetry, nice thoughts by the way 🙂

Community Member

I'm very lonely too😔 the fact that I am gets me down 😢

I just want to find happiness ❤

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey Oz and welcome,

great comments from everyone. Yeah, the feeling of loneliness sucks. I'm 47, have 2 teenagers and a 4 year old. I'm a single mum not working ATM but want to next year when she starts school. Sounds like you also have no partner? Do your children live With You? Do you get to do things just for you? Have you thought of a hobby group where you could meet like minded people? Sorry, lots of questions and only answer if you want to.

it does hurt but please know that on these forums you are not alone, we are here for you. there are beautiful, genuine caring people here who understand. If /when you're up to it you can join the social threads ie the BB cafe, circle if friendship and support for example.

here to support you Oz, hope to hear more from you.


Community Member

😢💔❤ Hi 😚

Wow 😮 your post has really touched me......I can feel your sadness and pain.....so sorry you are having to deal with this. ....let me know if I can help you in any way...😊