FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Loneliness after separation - Single Mum

Sas94
Community Member

Hi I am very new to sharing like this.

I'm 4 months separated from an abusive ex.

I live alone pretty much with my 6 month old. (When I say 'pretty much' I mean majority of the time we are home alone, my father lives with us but only really stops In once a week and is off again to work.

So I am alone which I struggle with, I fill my days by going out for coffee or op shopping or parks. But at night is the hardest time for me.

is there anyone in a similar situation up for a chat or maybe have some advice ?

3 Replies 3

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi, Welcome

I know the feeling well. All 3 past relationships of mine went past 7 years long before separation. One, my 11 year first marriage (2 kids) ended and at 40yo living in a caravan park, lonely very much so. Then after 8 weeks it all changed.

I saw a block of country land for sale and dreamed of building my own house. Once I secured the purchase my loneliness was irrelevant as I was too busy to think about it. For the next 12 months I built a two storey house, worked shift work and had my kids over to see the progress.

It was clear, I stumbled on the remedy of loneliness- variety and distraction. So passions, hobbies, clubs and interests- search your soul for what suits your personality. And don't forget you can go on dates just for fun and friendship.

My wife of 10 years recently suggested we buy a slot car set and add a train set to it. We've printed off buildings from the www printed them out and glue them together- great fun. Yes it isn't easy but doable.

I have a couple of threads I wrote that you might find interesting. Just Google them and read the first post-

Beyondblue topic variety and distraction

Beyondblue topic the best praise you'll ever get.

TonyWK

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion

hello and welcome.

there are probably others on the forum here in a similar position to you but that is not me. But I am able to listen and chat if that is OK with you.

I can somewhat relate to your feeling alone. I used to work from home in IT and did not have to go out, so for about 16 years did not really go out. Of course, you become left alone with your thoughts.

I imagine the last few months have been quite stressful and you did the right things by leaving your partner.

I know the world is very different now, especially when my kids were young. My wife formed a mothers group so there was one time at week at least when she could be with other people.

The fact you have been able to write here and the actions you took shows vulnerability, courage and strength. Well, I can see that in you and if you want to chat I am here.

If you want to tell me what you during the day or about your baby or favourite movie or whatever ...

Listening to you

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Sas, and a warm welcome to the site.

All of your replies have been from the opposite so I wonder whether you are looking to talk with people who are mums, but I know that I watch a program where it has hundreds and hundreds of different types of movies, the fee is so minimal and there are no ads and the time passes very quickly.

Geoff.