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living alone

randomx
Community Member

Wondering do you live alone if you don't mind me asking , and how long for , how do you find it ?

No need for any details if your not comfortable or anything like that, not prying just wondering about it all.

l've been living alone on off mostly 5yrs now since splitting with ex w. My daughter use to stay a lot but not much these days, 16, bf and friends over in her town, 20mins away . Also had a friend staying over a lot for awhile or me her place, separate rooms just friends. Then met my gf, together nearly two but 70% long distance,talking 24 7 non the mess but still mostly living alone. That ahsn't worked out and, still living alone.

It's the first time really since late teens and what a time of life for it to come along. l'm just wondering? l'm afraid l just can't get use to it or like it . Although times it's good also , like coming home tired, kick back for the night do your thing, watch what you want or sleep all day or listen to whatever you please as loud as you want day or night, no one else to worry about or please. It can be nice when the wk end rolls round too in ways , same reasons.

But , l still have a lot of trouble with it , don't think l'll ever get use to it. Even though there were plenty of times married would've given anything for this kinda freedom sometimes.

This house is pretty big , to me too big for one, one and a bit if my d stays. Not really into friends hangin round too often , assuming l had a few anyways, new town. But l think a smaller house would help , dunno how some people especially rich people live in monster mansions alone. l've even thought of sharing , got a spare room, it'd help the finances too. But tbh , getting a bit past that with a stranger and it'd cramp my style a bit and spoil the things l do like about this new life alone right now and having all this space to myself.

But over all , l'm really feeling the loneliness. Just don't know what to do about it though, how to deal with it . l feel like l'll get sorta lost in my own non existent world if l'm not careful. l do get out and about quite a bit actually but it's usually alone too. l've always enjoyed alone time even as a kid but l seem to have lost that these days and l find it's really taking it's toll on spirits and like life is passing by.

 

740 Replies 740

randomx
Community Member

Hiya cm.

Ahhh , pretty average at my end l'm afraid.

Hope your ok , Sunday tomorrow , have a nice one eh.

rx

ecomama
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hey rx, sometimes life feels a bit like a mousewheel - round and round. Tedious!

How are you doing today?

Did you get to see a Chiro?

I couldn't see mine after that knock on my neck. What worked wonders was laying on my electric blanket of FULL all night long hahaha.
I'm almost healed (back to before anyway) so all good here.

We're in Lock Down atm so the only "new" things are online or in the kitchen or stuff like that atm.

Have you thought of doing something NEW?
Just to break the tedium of your own mind do the revolutions of the same.

Take care, things are getting even more "interesting" here with the Lock Down being extended so ho hum lol.

Back to "work" tomorrow.
Love EM

randomx
Community Member

Hi em. Nah l only meant gf wise .

life ha, it'd be nice if that went around for a change. l've had enough new things , unexpecteds and new lives in mine for 5 people.

I want to minimalist so badly , crave it need it. l don't wanna own all the things l do either or all the junk l just end up accumulating as soon as l'm in the one spot long enough. l want to simple it down to just existing , ahhh the dream

Soon soon as gf says .

rx


CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

I'm with you rx . I want simple. No fuss,no gadgets no bs. I said this to M last week.he has a new car, lots of bells and whistles,whi h he didn't know, so does sis but at least he doesn't post all over social media. Told him all that stuff doesn't interest me. I just want basics.

Hugs

Cmf x

randomx
Community Member

Hiya cm.

Yeah , same. l so just want basic . And cars and gadgets ooo l hear ya. Sick to death of all of it. lt doesn't stop now , it'll never end.

rx

randomx
Community Member

life eh , who ever knows what's round the next bend. likely an incoming rant, could be a good time to go check out another thread.

Thread started off about living alone , how bizarre . l wouldn't mind that right now. Think from memory there's some bits about my daughters trials in this one too well, so much has happened since l won't go into it all but thank the Gods she got through it and just latelt much has happened. New bf, some great friends, learning how to handle her manic , soooo proud of her.

Well she's back living here for the moment , a long with bf and friends coming and going , staying days on end, ironically in a living alone thread. Yeah we had some talks about cutting back on the stayers and that's sorting itself out. ironically also that l was actually looking forward alone time and life to work through especially with gf now seems as we're on hold, maybe even permanently God knows but lots to think about. Suddenly d's back and the place is full of people 1/2 the time. l dunno whether to laugh or cry tbh haha. So much for the hermitian l'd planned probably for the rest of the yr or into oblivion for all l knew bc God knows when or even if gf gets through her stuff or be back.

l was seriously thinking about life without her tbh, and where to. Well , one of the biggest things would be love, could even l go there again , or being as picky as l am even meet anyone else l'd even want to go there again with.

sTRangest thing . One of d's friends is a lot older than her and in her 30s, she stays a lot too. She's a very very unusual person and oddly , really oddly , the sort of person l;d actually go for and we have some thing between us. No nothings happening or going to bc l'd want someone closer my age for a start so l'm not even opening that one no way got enough problems. But never the less there is a thing and what it's done is shown me that there could just be one more person out there and that maybe if it come's to that , l could if l was lucky enough to find her , have a future with.

l really didn't think it'd be even possible to come across someone else and if there was it'd probably be my ex somehow coming back onto the scene. lf not for that pretty sure it'd be life alone from here on. When your relationship is looking like it's down the tube, especially at this age, you think about this stuff. Not that l'd be rushing out there forget it, but this thing has just shown me it just could happen later on though given the right person.

rx

CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi rx,

You know people come into our lives for a reason right. The fact this lady makes you feel hopeful is great.

I know you wanted alone time but are you enjoying having your daughter and friends around? Is it a good distraction for you?

Ride the wave, see where it takes you. You just never know.

Hugs

Cmf x

randomx
Community Member

Gf also called over the wkend.

lt felt strange , l dunno. l just did not feel like getting dragged back into her on off in out stuff right now. l feel like alright we've made this damn break now and l'm trying to get my head and heart well , somewhere. l don't feel like talking right now if it's only gonna be more of that .

We didn't talk about any of it but she picked it up for sure and l know she's thinking . lt might be best she does a bit more of that l reckon.

rx

randomx
Community Member

ps

Sorry l get my threads and what's been talked about mixed up to btw , but please don't think it's in any way a disrespect to people that've chimed in bc nope that is always very appreciated. lt's just that l'm Dyslexic and in my case that effects keeping track or re reading things,writing or often repeating, anything literature. l'm trying to stick to one thread now though and then l should know where everything is.

Thanks to btw cm , l'll come back tonight. Hope your ok.

rx

randomx
Community Member

Hiya cm

Tbh , nope it's the last thing l needed right now and l don't do distractions don't bother it doesn't work when your finished things are still there anyway so to speak.

l don't know now though what to feel about them around. Feel guilty wanting my own time and house back too . But l'm trying to stay positive about it. We've been through so much with her though this last 18mths , that's not easy me and ex both are exhausted with most things d.

Butttttt, on a more positive note yeah , who knows. Of course it's nice in some ways too and maybe l get a nice surprise out of it somewhere a long the line too eh.

Hope your ok hugs back.

rx