Hello Jim, whatever happens in a relationship can be a joint reaction and can not be particularly blamed on one person, although this depends on the situation.
By getting help makes you able to overcome those previous thoughts, if this didn't happen, then counselling wouldn't be a viable choice, fortunately that's the benefits of therapy to help you understand the pros and cons of how you are feeling and to strengthen your thoughts.
People, friends and/or family all have their own issues which some only want to keep to themselves, while there are others who do want to help you, either for a short time or on a continual basis, and are able to hold their own thoughts to themselves just to help you, these are those we try and find and eventually one day offer your own thoughts to assist them.
If you still get dragged back into the hole, then the support has not been beneficial long enough to support you and encourage you that people do want to help you over this hurdle, because it is possible.
These might include many trigger points you haven't been able to cope with previously, but after help in therapy you can learn on how to avoid them before they cause any harm.
You may decide to do other things rather than exercise because that being suggested to me by my psychologist, I simply couldn't do, so something else replaced this.
Not wanting any help is being in denial but there are other solutions you can look out for.
Best wishes.
Geoff.
