I've had enough

[tux43]

I'm not sure what to do. My wife expects me to constantly work, look after the kids and she spends all the time socialising with friends.

I love my kids so much and value the time spent with them and all she can do is whinge.

She took my son shopping tonight, which would be something I would cherish. The first thing she did was complain when she came in the door.

We have an ok relationship but I can't handle that everything is negative. Our son is 15, headstrong and fairly independent hence will have about 5 more years with us before he leaves. Why can't she see we will never get this time again.

I've had enough of working for nothing and negativity ruling life. I'm at my wits end!!

[Guest_1584]

Hi tux

l've been there but in a bit of a mix and reverse in spots too.

l was taking my ex w for granted a lot and it really wore her down , eventually it among other things it ruined our marriage. We were together 19yrs all up. but in a lot of ways l just didn't realize l was being so negative and slack with her.

l think the first thing you gotta do is stop taking it, tell her, put your foot down a bit , take some time out for your self too , the way she does , let her hold the fort and do her share for once and on a regular basis . you gotta turn this around a bit. And let her know you've had enough of the negativity too.

lf my w had told me and did something like this instead of holding it all in we'd probably till be married and have our family in tact.

And l so hear you with the kids and time. At least that part l did realize and turned those tables myself before it was lost. l realized my daughter was 8 or 9 and l'd hardly been involved at all , l loved her to bits but l use to leave everything up to my w and l realized l hardly went anywhere with them and with her or spent hardly any time with her.

That broke my heart when l realized how much time with her l'd lost and l started working and turning the tables right away and spending more time with her. l looked after her and her friends when they were over , held the fort give mum a brake. took them places ,took my d places , spent more time with her just anytime but especially of a night l'd see her to bed and we'd lay around and talk for an hour or so before he went to sleep , lots of things . She's16now and sadly ex and l have been divorced 5yrs but l still spend as much time as l can with my d and we still talk a lot and go places as much as we can.

so at least l sorta got that part right before it was too late.

Anyway yeah , you've gotta turn this around a bit man .Hopefully that doesn't have to mean fights and crap , maybe just talking to her is enough to help , but you'll have to follow through and be prepared to put your fot down too if necessary.

Good luck anyway.