Hi welcome
Sadly for his age group (I'll assume he's under 28yo) it can be common but not necessarily normal.
Lets nit firget there are many mature, responsible guys out thafter all he ere that are young adults.
What seems to be with your man is he isnt mature and wants it all, the lifestyle he has always had with his mates, drinking, late nights and potentially unfaithful. But he also wants the luxury of a partner. Great for him, not good for you.
So, what are your options? Here is my approach I'd put to him if I was in your shoes.
I'd arrange a meeting, yep an official meeting no distractions, no phones etc. I'd not raise my voice and I'd be brief and direct. I'd tell him what I wanted in life, my dreams and how I have to go about seeking them i.e a partner that cares for me, one that doesnt have a separate single life, one that will save for a home instead if buying expensive drinks and entry charges to venues.
Everytime he switches the topic to hinself you stop him and say "this conversation is about me and our baby, if you like we can talk about you later" (.This is to stem his nature to think only of himself).
Then ask him "so considering I have these normal needs as a partner and soon to be mother, how does your single lifestyle fit in with my dreams"?
Love is a two way street. If he chooses to continue his choices that leave you abandoned then he needs a strong reply. No yelling, no repeating yourself...direct and solid in your determination to progress in your life.
You are not then preaching, you are giving him choices. Thats important.
You are likely to get promises, pledges and short term changes.But maturing takes time and you have to decide if you are up to waiting maybe 10-15 years for that.
You could also seek family counseling. Relationships Australia might be one good phone call to make or see your GP.
Regards
Tony WK
