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I feel stressed under this restrictions.
I’m 22 and currently live in the area that is under stage 4 restrictions. While the restriction allows me to go meet my romantic partner, I kinda don’t wanna go because I live with two at risk people. I’ve stayed at home for a total of almost 5 months since the beginning of the pandemic and it’s stressing me out.
Me and my partner, we’re under a lot of stress for not being able to see each other. We keep fighting and seems like we cannot get things to work out. I expect a lot more attention and affection from him. I want him to at least call me once or twice a week. And by call, I mean when we’re seriously focusing on talking with each other, not him playing games and watching streamers. Whenever I get mad at him, he promised that he’ll try to change but it just keep staying that way.
But I also feel like I’m the one who’s being annoyingly unreasonable. I feel super lonely and anxious that our relationship is not gonna work, and I don’t know when will this all end so I can start a normal life again. Because of that, I want him to talk with me more, care for me more. I get mad when he sleeps 12 hours a day. I get mad when he watches a movie and take a while to reply to my message. I even get mad because he doesn’t know that I have a haircut. I didn’t tell him but I changed my avatar on a social media platform. I just feel like if he’s really care about me, he would have known. Even the smallest thing can trigger me.
I told him about my feelings, what I think and what I want from him. He told me he’s understand but after a few days, it’s just going back to the same way.
The main reason that I feel that way is because when we first met, he care about the littlest detail about me. Everything that I get mad about above, would never happen. All these things make me feel like he doesn’t love me anymore and the feelings we have for each other has faded. And because of that, I kinda resent him more.
We just decided to stop talking with each other for a week to sort all of our feelings out. But I seriously don’t know how to control my feelings and stop expecting too much from him.
But seriously, when will this all end? Stay safe guys and remember to comply with the rules.
Keep checking in to let us know how you’re going, whenever you feel up to it.
Welcome to the forums.
The lockdowns have been hard on many in our community and relationships have faced various challenges as people either get separated from their partners or stuck with them (especially for couples used to having time apart in the course of a workday).
I can see that the lockdown has resulted in you craving more attention from your partner. It's perfectly normal to want your partner to call you and focus on you once or twice a week, but unfortunately he's using that time to do other things as well. The lack of attention is making you feel unhappy, resulting in you getting mad over things that would otherwise not matter as much.
I wonder if he's also mentally struggling with the lockdowns as you are? If he used to be very attentive but isn't now, could it be because he's not in the right frame of mind to notice these little things about you? It could also be why he sleeps 12 hours a day. He may not be communicating it well to you for various reasons.
Perhaps you could ask him how best he would like to connect with you during the lockdown? By finding a common ground on which you can both communicate and support each other, you may also be able to find comfort and get reassurance that he still cares for you.
Lockdowns are difficult, but it's unfortunately our reality now. Hang in there, Crys. I hope all this ends soon too.