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I feel lonely but don't live alone?

Qxz
Community Member
Since the decease of my parents I have had to take on the responsibility of being independent. I have recently moved from living with my auntie to my older brothers house. The environment I was in at my aunties was unreasonable for me to live in and I believed the close relationship I have with my brother would mean we could get along living together. I prepared myself for the cons aswell as the pros. However since moving I have just completely crashed. At home I live with my brother and his girlfriend. They are often fighting due to her bipolar and other problems. My brother is always out doing his own thing or caring for his girlfriend and barely gives me any attention. We will talk here and there and maybe watch a movie together but at the end of the day we're living very separate lives. I feel like I haven't moved in with my brother, I feel as though i've just boarded a room with random housemates. Me and my brother have fought a few times since moving in, which is normal but I don't handle anger well and I usually just burst into tears. I look up to my brother and I consider everything he says. He can be a very angry , selfish person and not realise that he actually says some really hurtful things to me. I understand I'm getting used to my new place and the way things work here but I feel completely alone in all of it. Independence is something someone should have to experience when transitioning from adolescence to adulthood, not when a girl's just turned 16. Doing my own washing, cooking my own food, doctors appointments, working, shopping, transport, school everything I do I do on my own and it has been quite overwhelming. I know this is just something I will have to get used to, like any independent. I want to work on my relationship with my brother so I can feel content and know he's there when he needs me. Not this feeling of going to bed in an empty house... Yet I don't know how to build on things without getting in the way too much and making things awkward. I understand everyone needs alone space too..
1 Reply 1

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Qxz the problem is a hard one to take, Your still only 16, going to school, learning to be independant only on your self. Getting to school, doctors, cooking, cleaning all the things you need to learn to be independant. Those take years to learn successfully. Heck I thought I knew enough at the age of 21. Mean time at 35 I finally got most of it together. Then at 40 I had it together, finally yea thought me. Then I got a partner, had a baby. Here is me back at square one again learning different stuff again just when I thought I had it. Now the kids are older and help a little. There is only a small amount I will let them do. At 15 and 18 but at least I am helping to give them a grounding in independance. Before its to late. In your case give your self time it all takes time your still young. Thats not your fault it will get there.