None of the housemates I've had over the years have been perfect but these two were once my only friends. They didn't judge me for ending up on the dole after graduating from uni like my parents did. They used to want to spend time with me.
But it's been three years without a job now, I've lost the transport I had and I'm only just avoiding debt. I'm not even getting phone calls back when I send my resume out. So I was sitting at my desk crying. I couldn't stop shaking. One of my housemates walked into the room to get something. And walked straight back out.
My boyfriend pays for me to go to a sport. I had to call home for a lift because I nearly feinted and couldn't stop shaking. The other housemate answered and as soon as he heard crying he put the phone down and went for my boyfriend. He didn't even ask if I was okay. Not on the phone. Not when I walked through the door.
Am I crazy, or are these abnormal reactions to a friend of 5 years diagnosed with anxiety and depression shaking on the floor?
It's like they aren't my friend.
And today they asked if I would put some money towards a house project. Where do they think I was going to get it from? Is everything going in one ear and out the other?
I am so alone.
