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Horrible monster in a close cousin is back
I am sorry to read about what you are dealing with, dealing with anyone family or friend who you know is suffering and not themselves is always tough and you have done the right things by suggesting they need to seek professional help if you think that is what is required. The hard part is you cannot control if they go or not and I know it hurts so much but at the same time you can only focus on what you can control and that is looking after yourself and your mum. In time your cousin may come around and realise what he is doing is not correct but it is so hard to help someone if they do not want to help themselves. I am sorry to be putting it bluntly and I am not trying to come across that way. As I said however look after yourself but still keep supporting your cousin and letting them know you are there for them if they need you. Maybe have a read of the support someone section of these forums, simply scroll to the top of the fact and under the section called "The facts" there is another section called support someone, have a read through there.
My best for you and your family,
I understand what you are saying, understanding why they are doing this is one of the hardest things. You can only help someone so much as well, but I think as much as it may feel one sided, being there for them is still a must I think, they are still family and hopefully they come around again. I wish I had better advice to offer you but keep supporting them as best as you can.