Waves* hiya. Little about me, active in the community country town dweller, unschooling mum to three amaze kids (one autistic, two others HSP), wife to tinkerer, backyard engineer, asd and adhd husband (not on disabilities and not working), youth activities facilitator, social anxiety and GAD sufferer, genuine INFJ alien and an IRL word salad style communicator.
My story.
Stuff is crazy here, marriage is strained and currently overwhelmed from work. I really struggle with speaking to my husband because of so much fear of getting it wrong all the time. I get it wrong lots. Unintentionally lying by omitting details about things or just not stating my thoughts verbally and entirely is a big problem. I'm also really defensive about my thoughts as I constantly feel under attack even when I'm not. My aspie husband struggles so much to try and understand but I don't have the answers to his logic seeking why things are the way they are.
I'm torn between wanting an equal partnership with him like a regular marriage (lol sounds so mainstream) and just knowing that I have to deal with my stuff myself and be a carer to him (without formal status as such). There is lots of blame both ways, (he has expressed that I'm too much for him and wants to leave), and with work, the kids social stuff (has to be organized by me because we don't use schools), having time to spend with my friends and trying to maintain a together face in the community, I just feel like I'm drowning... 😣😢 end of rant...
Wow, yup, being an intense person is an understatement.
