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Girlfriend suffers from depression blocked me out of nowhere
My girlfriend of 3 months suffers from depression, bi polar and can often have axiety attacks. She knows how much we mean to each other and only last week. she said how no boyfriend has ever treated her so well and spoiled her so much. However this past week she isn't allowed much access to her phone due tI health and family issues so I'm rarely able to communicate with her. I messaged her saying if she's okay and to to text me when she sees my message. My last messaged I asked something is odd between us she replied the next day will talk about it soon. 3 days later she didn't reply and I saw her updating he Twitter and checking Facebook like everything is fine when it's not.
I know from her parents that deep down she is going through a rough patch however she hasn't replied or answered any of my calls all I was asking was if she was okay since I was really worried that something was wrong and we always prMoises to resolve any problems within a few hours so it doesn't effect her mentally and also so it jeopardize our relationship. She didn't end up replying and blocked my Facebook and phone number with no explanation.
Is the relationship over? Or do I give it a few weeks break. I find it very odd because I asked her friends if she was ok and I was worried about her which they ended up not replying and blocked my Facebook aswell. Things were perfect and she had mentally improved so much since I we began dating 😞 All of a sudden everything has fallen apart and I'm not sure if it's all over
Welcome and I hope we can support you through this difficult period. I'm going through a relationship break-up which blindsided me so I know how you're feeling.
I will try to speak frankly and honestly as I think that's what you're looking for by coming here for an impartial view, rather than going to others closer to you.
It's really hard when these things happen and we're not expecting it. The only thing we can do is let the other person know that we don't understand what's happened, it would be great to talk about it, but we also understand that it's their decision to make. And from what I've read, you've done all of those things.
So this is the time to make sure you stay safe, since you've done all you can for her already. Now, it's a matter of her coming to you when she feels ready to talk again because she clearly doesn't feel ready now.
So I know it's hard not to, but I don't think asking "Is the relationship over?" is the right question for you now. It sounds like you're really hurt by this and the right question for you is: "How will I get through this period?"
The great news, which just reflects your maturity, is that you've already taken the first steps by coming to us here. I'm really impressed by this because it can be so difficult to open up to people.
Can I ask whether you have any non-mutual friends who can keep you distracted while she works out how she feels?
Here's a hug to a fellow confused heart.
Hi Mark, thank you for the reply 🙂
I am finding it very hard at the moment and also quit some anger has built up due to no contact it has mentally taken a toll on me as I'm constantly worried for her. I knew what I was getting myself into. She is fine 90% of the time, she knows I understand what she goes through (which most people's she surrounds herself think it's all just made up) and I always try my very best to get her into a better state of mind. It just makes me really dissapointed that I have been totally cut off when I'm only trying to help.
However I have been keeping a lot more busy today and most likely the rest of the week so I have less time to think and stress more about the situtation currently at hand.
You are strong to have posted and thankyou 🙂
You care a great big time about your girlfriend and good on you. I wouldnt say its over as from what you have said
If I may ask you, has your girlfriend been diagnosed by a health professional re her depression and anxiety condition?
I have had both for many years and it does take some time before recovery. I have had the same for many years and it does get better...
Please dont be this hard on yourself right now as she has an illness that can effect her ability to be in a relationship. Go really easy and be 'gentle' with her right now......that would be a huge help for her..
Well done for posting Sizzar and good on you!
It would be great if you could post back when convenient for you of course
Hi Paul 🙂
She has been proffesionally with axiety and depression at a very young age.
Only recently (4 months ago) she had been diagnosed with bipolar and borderline personality disorder. I have given her space in the past when she has asked which is totally fine however not for this long.
I'll have to just be patient and hope for the best as I understand 10% of time she is not herself I just didn't think it would end up as the current situation. I think the more I push the worse it can get and longer it will take to be her usual happy self.
Hey Sizzar, you have a good understanding of what your girlfriend is going through. I have been pushed by my GF's and the worse it got as I was really crook. Having depression can be like walking around with a heavy blanket over your head and not being able to find your way....its crap.
Without being a pain can I ask if she is having regular visits to her GP/therapist? The regular counseling is a huge key that can unlock the door towards recovery.
Please feel welcome to post back Sizzar about any matter....I do feel your pain
She is having weekly 1 hour visits with her psychiatrist now over the past month prior to that it was fortnighty to monthly and has this has happened for a number of years.
sorry to hear that you are going through a tough time at the moment. You sound like a wonderful caring person who doesnt deserve to be treated this way.
from the sounds of it you have done nothing wrong and most likely the relationship isnt over. However, i know when i am going through a tough time it is SO much easier to just be alone and not have to be accountable to anyone else.
I think she has probably made a rash decision in ending contact with you. Hopefully if you can just give her some time (easier said than done, i know) she will reach out to you when she is ready.
all the best,
I understand the situation you are going through currently as I am going through the same (where I have posted separately within this forum). It is tough to question if the relationship is over when you don't hear. I am doing the same as well after my partner lashed out on me saying he has told me that he needed space after I asked the question "Are we ok? I can't help but think we are drifting." And the only reason I had asked him is cause my partner was on facebook messenger and whatsapp alot more than normal.
The forums have helped and the advice I been getting - which the above are saying - is firstly just let her know you are there when she is ready to talk and most importantly look after yourself.
Hopefully for both our sakes - things are not over and they will reach out soon. As I am sure just like me, you would like to be there for your partner to support them through this.
Thanks for the replies guys I will keep a update on the situation the forum has been a massive help I have been given a good prescriptive of the situation through your expierences and have decided to contribute to the beyond blue with monthly donations.
I'm doing a lot better now. Hopefully it all works out and her health returns to normal and recieve the help she needs as that's my main concern at the end of the day even if it doesn't involve a relationship with me.