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Feeling misunderstood

Zoe_L
Community Member
Hi everyone my name is Zoe and I feel a bit misunderstood by my family like whenever I have difficult things going on in my life I feel like I can't talk to anyone in my family about it as they usually just try and tell me that they get what I'm feeling and we sometimes have arguments that make me feel quite sad and alone at times. Has anyone else had the same feeling and am I crazy for having these emotions. Btw I am new.
10 Replies 10

BballJ
Community Member

Hi Zoe.L,

Firstly, welcome to the forums. I think many people go through stages where they feel misunderstood especially by their family. I do not think these are crazy emotions at all. What do you feel you are being misunderstood about?

My best for you,

Jay

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion

Welcome. I think that if you have come here can indicate some issue that needs to be addressed.

Can you explain what the difficult things are? Do these stress you out?

Are the feelings physical such as a lump in the throat, or just emptiness?

The fact that you might have difficulties explaining is because you have 10000 things going on in your mind? Personally, if I have many thoughts in my head I don't generally know where to start. And if I do start then spitting out all at once and making no sense at all.

Are you on edge most of the time? Are you grumpy? Can or does your mood change at the drop of a hat?

I cannot say what you should do, but do not think that you are crazy at you put it. In fact I would say that you are being honest, and the next step is a self examination to determine the course of action to take.

Best wishes

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hello Zoe, welcome to the site.

No you are not crazy, I think the family wants to push away how you are feeling, maybe it's something they can not deal with, don't understand or don't want to know.

Ring the Beyond Blue phone number at the top of the page or Reachout on 1800 55 1800 or online, Lifeline 131114, Suicide Call 1300 659 467 or online.

Are you able to see your doctor who you can talk with and they will then get the help you need but please let us know. Geoff.

Zoe_L
Community Member

Hi Jay

I guess whenever I try to explain or talk to them about any issues I have I feel they don't truly understand what I tell them for example if I try to talk to them about an issue I have they don't really give me advice as such but just get irritated and not speak to me And I also have a mild physical disability which has been difficult for me to socialise and meet new people. Whenever I bring up my emotions regarding my disability or lack of social interaction they don't sit down and talk to me they just tell me that they understand how I'm feeling and don't really give me much advice or comfort.

Zoe_L
Community Member

Hi smallwolf

Some of these feelings are felling empty and i guess I feel tired and stressed sometimes. My moods definitely do change and I would say I do have a short fuse. There are times where I get home after a bad day and just yell and scream but also there are times where I feel like some of the arguments we have are all my fault and I think that sometimes my family just down grades me and sees the issues I have as not important which I guess is why we have arguments sometimes

Zoe_L
Community Member

Hi Geoff

Yes I do see a doctor about these issues however each time I see them some members of my family like my dad think that seeing someone to talk about my issues is stupid. I think he thinks I should talk about the arguments we have and I do but I don't think he knows that seeing this doctor is the only way I get to explain my feelings outside of the family. There are times where I think they just don't want to know which does make me feel empty.

smallwolf
Community Champion
Community Champion

Zoe, I am no doctor so I only only relate my experience to what I read in yours... the short fuse could be related to the stress you feel from what. And this will lead to arguments. Me on the other hand, I would let my anger, tension, frustration grow inside me. Additionally, I am supported by the family etc. whereas it it seems your family disregards your problems? Remember that how you/I feel is invisible to the outside world.

Also (my perspective here) if you have all this built up stress, when you are arguing, where you do start? Because the feelings are a combination if everything that happened today, yesterday, and thinking about tomorrow.

You said in a reply to Geoff you are seeing a doctor? I assume you mean someone like a psych? I agree with you that it is the only way to get the feeling out into the open and find solutions (or coping techniques) to the issues we all face.

Not sure how this would work, but could you take one of the family members to a session to see what happens? (I am just thinking out loud here.) Maybe then that person might appreciate what the person you talk to does, and sees how it helps you?

Finally, do you have a support person outside of your family that you can talk to about any of these sorts of issues? Talk through the day. Talk about the stress you feel? How could things improve? What would make it easier for you? (These are things that I talk to my support people about on a somewhat regular basis between psych visits)

Just throwing random ideas out there...

Hey Zoe

from my experience its normal to feel this way. Nothing worse when your feeling off and to add to it family do not truly get it.

I have felt like you loads of times but now l accept that people whoever they are are all the same. If it does not make sense in their way of thinking they either dismiss it just like you would for something or accept it same as you. Thing l have learnt is to stop expecting others to get me.

I know family is our first port of call but for you perhaps if possible start looking outside for yourself.

stop expecting see what happens over next couple months.

All the best hope it helps move something for you.

Giggles

BballJ
Community Member

Hi Zoe.L,

I am sorry to read you feel that way, it does sound like they have a hard time understanding you. May I ask, what do you want from the forums? Advice on dealing with your parents and a space you can vent the stuff you would like to say to them. I am asking just so I can make sure I give you the best advice possible.

My best,

Jay