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Feeling broken after complex deceit and infidelity
Welcome to Beyond Blue and well done for reaching out. Although I must say, what an awful situation for you to be in. I am so sorry to hear of your struggles right now.
I know what it felt like when I was cheated on, lied to and betrayed like that. It was my first fiance, and I knew that the supposed friendship that he had with this other woman was so much more than friendship, but he kept insisting there was nothing in it. .......... that was until I came home early from work one day and sprung them in a very compromising, passionate position ..... undressing each other ...... well, you can guess the rest. I was so shattered.
But we ...... well, it was more ME that 'worked through it' ..... he told me a bunch of stuff that I wanted to hear and wanted to believe .... and we got back together after a few months. But then he did it again and again. Not only that, but he also became very inappropriately involved with a child and ended up going to jail. I was then almost more shattered than words could ever express. I could barely forgive myself for not being able to see through the lies, the manipulation, and for trusting him again and again, only to be broken again and again.
I would like to strongly recommend that you seek some face-to-face counseling for yourself, and perhaps the children too. Moving forward from this is something almost too big to do on your own. Of course you can come here to Beyond Blue as much as you like. But I really think that perhaps more support could be quite beneficial.
I really feel for you, and do hope that you can soon find some sort of peace and relief from this awful mess you are currently experiencing. Just remember to be gentle with yourself and take it minute by minute.
And know too that I will be thinking of you. Take care. Feel free to respond if you want. Just one more thing though; I am not a professional of any kind, just a fellow human being with a similarish experience. xo