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Feeling alone

Community Member

Hi So I dont know how to do this so sorry if its a bit messy.

So I am currently studying at home online, my family background is a little complicated my mum for the last 12 years has been in and out of mental health clinics. Recently she has to go in for 4-6 weeks I usually don't mind helping out at home as I've got 3 brothers and two sister which one is medically complex and has recently been diagnosed with autism I am basically a second mum. Since I was a preteen ive given up a lot to help out, but I feel so emotionally and physically tired. I have lost a lot over the last year including all my friends because of corona and the fact I was not able to see them and I've lost my job. Which was my only source to getting out the house. I just feel so alone, I have one friend but she cant go out as she is basically house bound and to unwell for visitors. I get so angry and upset about the tiniest issue, I also binge eat because of this and my weight has gone up. I don't have a lot of people I can speak to and I don't know what to do, I wanna feel better but I dont know where to begin. I want friends to go out with or people I can talk to, I want a job but cant seem to find one and I dont want to be a "mother figure" to my siblings. Its not my reasonability anymore I am sick of it. ( Okay rant over ) πŸ™‚

4 Replies 4

Hi Lola Lou, 

It sounds like you have a lot on our plate at the moment with your study and family situation, we are really sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time. Caring for others can be an incredibly draining and difficult thing and so we are really glad that you have come to the forums to shar you story - it is a really brave thing to do. 

We think that it might be useful for you to have a chat to one of our counsellors who can help you in the moment if you feel stressed and can help point you in the direction of further support if you like. We've put a few numbers below that you can check out if you want.

Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636
Lifeline 13 11 14
KidsHelpline 1800 55 1800

You can also try webchats if that is easier for you instead of talking on the phone. There are some links below - please note that the webchats aren't 24/7 like the phonelines. If you need someone, you can always call.

Beyond Blue 

Thankyou again Lola Lou for sharing your story with us today, that took a lot of courage. We hope that you can come back and update us if you feel comfortable. There are also lots of great conversations happeneing across the forums so feel free to take a look around. 

Kind regards, 
Sophie M

Community Member

mum should understand mental health disabling you from being a carer so explain how doing all of this is eating away at you, list your symptoms, and tell her to hire someone like a babysitter or a nanny who is qualified and equipped to care for young children, and what's going to happen if you're forced to do this any longer. you are right with how it isnt a parentified eldest daughter's responsibility and you should be allowed to enjoy life like any youth instead of having to care for 5 children on top of studies and work

Community Member

Hi Lola Lou,

That sounds like a stressful predicament to be in, I’m sorry to hear it’s so difficult at the moment. How old are you?

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Lola Lou, welcome to the site.

It certainly seems to be draining for you, but you may be able to get a carer's payment or an allowance, so contact the Australian government and find out, or browse the net.

Best wishes.