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Thank you for reaching out to our community here. We are so sorry to hear that you are feeling so guilty and broken. We understand that this is a very difficult situation. Hopefully a few of our community members will pop by to welcome you and offer some sage words of advice.
We would recommend that if you do leave, you do plan to do it in a way that is safe since your partner has been physical in the past. You have the right to live free from violence and abuse - if you need some advice on how to leave in a safe way, please feel free to get in contact with the lovely supportive counsellors at 1800RESPECT. You can contact them on 1800 737 732 or visit https://www.1800respect.org.au/
You might be interested to read through a story of someone who was experiencing something similar: https://healthyfamilies.beyondblue.org.au/seeking-support/helping-yourself-and-others/online-forums/...
Please feel free to reach out here on your thread anytime and let us know what you're going through.
Totally agree with Sophie M,
Beyondblue topic guilt the tormentor
Self preservation especially from abuse is not only your right but your own obligation to yourself in terms of safety and a happy future.
Hello JJ89, maybe you need to determine whether this new friend is making your situation worse and/or whether it's a breath of fresh airway away from your husband and it maybe so by your comments being disconnected.
A person who demands their way of thinking and then becomes angry with you but then changes their mind by breaking down and want you to stay together creates a huge problem.
You have to remember whether it's your own health that matters or whether you stay married to a person you're not happy with.
Hope to hear back from you.
Hello and welcome. It sounds to me that your husband is the classic domestic abuser. He either uses physical attacks on you or makes you feel guilty because he is behaving badly. You do not have to put up with this. Sophie has given you the DV support number and I urge you to contact them.
You do need to make plans to leave safely as Sophie has said. The 1800Respect people will be able to advise you. For your own safety please take the appropriate steps but do not tell your husband you are leaving until after you have gone. Please be very careful.