Dilemma (regarding child safety)

[amirha]

Hi everyone,

I hope this is ok to ask here...

I am autism and don't interact/understand people very well, so I'm not quite sure how to handle this situation.

I moved to a new home about 1.5 years ago. I have neighbours a few doors up where the man of the house (young family) screams (extremelly loudly, lots of profanities, calling them names) at the mother and children in a way that has me in tears some days (especially hearing the children sobbing and the mother begging him to stop).

A few times I have felt sure he was going to seriously harm someone. I don't know them well, but the mother expresses publicly she is very happy and in the best relationship she has ever been in. 

The family members I have confided to about this have said it's not my business and to stay out of it.

But I have been in many violent situations as a child and I’m not sure people who haven’t been in those situations understand just how terrifying (and damaging) it is for children.

Well after several hours of him screaming at them this afternoon I am feeling very overwhelmed and torn about what to do.

Do I report this? Is there any way I can assess if I am just over reacting?

Feeling very torn and confused.

[Croix]

Dear Amirha~

Welcome to the forum, it is a good place to come to when you have a situation as difficult as yours. It must be very worrying and upsetting for you, particularly as it will being back such horrible memories.

I guess there are two things that have to be considered, the first of which is your own safety. If there were any reason for the husband to blame you or your family if he was approached by authorities it could turn very ugly. It could also be - surprisingly - that if the mother suspected you then the husband might get to hear about it that way.

Not a simple thing, particularly as your family has said not to get involved.

The other thing is to have some sort of idea if your worries are reasonable, and if so what action to take. Here I'd talk to the professionals. There is an organization called 1800RESPECT who either might give you advice directly as this sounds as if it might be an abusive realtionship, or they might refer you to another organisation better equipped to deal wiht the safety of children. Again your own safety is the most important thing.

Again not simple if the mother maintains nothing is wrong.

I think you are a very caring person to worry like this. I know your family is not keen but do you have anyone to give you support, someone you can talk about what this is doing to you?

We would very much like to hear from you again if you felt you wanted to

Croix