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Can't catch a break

Toughmumma
Community Member

Hi, Im new to this and just needed to vent really.

I'm feeling like I can't get my head completely above water. There is always something. I have gone to the gp about anxiety. She has put me into connections to talk to someone and said it is completely justified in what I was telling her.

I have been having sleeping, health issues, I work two jobs, and raise two kids, which I think I suck at most of the time. I feel like I am always yelling and they are always yelling and no one is actually listening to each other. I feel completely ignored most of the time.

I am made to feel like I am too dramatic by my husband, and fairly alone in most that I do. He goes to work, works hard, but then comes home and clocks off. I literally run the rest of our lives.

The kids have molluscum which is contagious and can last for years and making me and them constantly anxious. Paranoid even.I stress about everything and now have sleeping issues that results in me running from my bed, in my sleep, to find my kids. Bizarre I know. I hurt my back right when I can't afford too. There is just no chance to just breath.

So I pick up, I carry on, day by day, I have good days and try to focus on the positives in life everyday, but I am starting to see the cracks and looking at which way to turn. I can't keep all the balls in the air. And I drop them, everyone around me suffers just as much.

I have been to a psychologist after my mum past and found him dreadful. I am trying again. I am trying to avoid medication, and treat the source, find management skills. Any suggestions? Councillor, psychiatrist, psychologist? Is it a case of just keep trying till you find one that works for you?

2 Replies 2

blondguy
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Toughmumma

Welcome and thankyou for having the courage to be a part of the forums

You really have your hands full and I understand what you are going through. My first mega anxiety attack was in 1983 when I was 23 and it was awful....Can I ask if you get anxiety attacks?

To answer your question......I saw about 6 psychologists/psychiatrists until I found a good one and yes its a major pain but worth it. 35 years later all I do now is see my GP every 4 weeks for a fine tune and my psychiatrist every six months. Just out of respect for you I take a low dose antidepressant very day to take the edge of my anxiety..........for the last 21 years. With regular counseling the meds saved my career....my personal life and my peace of mind too (just for me)

You will never be judged on the forums and your privacy is paramount to Beyond Blue

There are many gentle people that also suffer the same and can be here for you....I am only one of them

I hope you can post back when convenient for you Toughmumma

My Kind thoughts for you

Paul

Little_lollipop
Community Member

Hey there!

To answer your question, yes. It can take a great deal of time finding someone your comfortable with and can help you.

I know your struggle hun, I'm at Uni and have two children and I also work. I hold up the household and do all paperwork, shopping, kids stuff, etc. I also suffer from anxiety and depression.

Here is my advice.

1. When you feel horrible, write it in a 'thoughts' book. Also do this when you feel good. It helps to ease that frustration and controls some of those emotions.

2. Communicate. Sit your husband down and explain how you feel. Tell him you NEED support and he will have to pitch in. Sometimes partners don't mean to check out of their responsibilities, they just don't see them because someone else is doing it or they haven't been told.

3. Time management. Schedule out your days on a calendar very specifically. ALWAYS include a day for you to relax. Seeing this day and time means you have something to look forward to. Also, laying out your week, you can see just how much time you spend doing these things (and so can your husband ;D ) so you can manage that time better.

4. If the kids are old enough, enforce some chores. It really helps. Just little things like putting dishes away or making all the beds.

I hope these things help. If all else fails then you need to step back and rethink your lifestyle. If your mental health is suffering then something needs to give. You might have to downsize the house, buy a cheaper car or forego takeaways ( only examples) so that you can drop one of your jobs.

Chin up! You will make it through!