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Been alone all my life.
I wanted to reach out and say I can deeply relate to what you have said here, and it's very hard. Oftentimes all we want in life is someone to love us, and its the one thing we can't control, no matter how hard we are prepared to work for it, wait for it, etc. Loneliness hurts.
I am sure that you have already done the standard things to try and address it, such as social clubs, rotary, perhaps rescuing an animal as a companion, volunteering with local organisations, etc so forth (which although this may not find you a lady, would certainly find you friends). But I understand this doesn't take away the longing for a special relationship. It is hard to watch others have so easily what you want so badly, and are constantly denied by life.
I am very lonely myself, as I am 37 and live in a rural town that is full of families - very few single men here! But my house is here, my job and my life, and I don't want to leave (no guarantees I would meet someone even if I moved to the city anyway). But I do related to the innate sense of loss and grief you are describing. I sense that it would be made all the worse for you since you have retired; if you don't have anything to get out of bed for, depression sets in very quickly. I truly hope you are involved in some community organisations in an effort to alleviate this; I do a fair bit with the local animal rescue and it has made such a difference in my life, being able to save animals and find them new homes.
I don't have any solutions for you, other than to say I hear your story, and feel your sadness, and truly hope you find companionship in some form, whether it be animals, friends or a special lady that may come late into your life.
Hi Peter......(Thankyou jax_in_my_heart for your wonderful post)
Really good to have you on the forums with us! I do feel your pain as my relationships were usually short lived as a result of ongoing anxiety for 37 years....so I turn 60 in 2 hours and still never been married...I understand your feelings on this....with or without any anxiety health problems
I dont think that not being married is in our genes at all....yet I do believe that we follow our parents behavior where upbringing is concerned
If you want to have a chat you are always welcome Peter
Just a note if I can....The forums are a Safe and Non Judgemental place for you to post. Your privacy and well being are paramount to Beyond Blue
Being lonely is awful Peter...I hope we can help provide some support...We may not have instant message capabilities yet we are here for you
my kind thoughts