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Chris_B PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING: 3 important tips to get the most out of this section
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, The Relationships & Family Issues section is one of the busiest here on our forums. It's also one of the areas where we find members can get themselves into trouble! Before posting here, take a deep breath and be mindful of the following... View more

Hi everyone, The Relationships & Family Issues section is one of the busiest here on our forums. It's also one of the areas where we find members can get themselves into trouble! Before posting here, take a deep breath and be mindful of the following 3 tips: 1. Do you really want to share this with the world? This is a public forum. Are you thinking of posting something that could identify you to a friend or family member? Once you've posted, you can't delete what you've written and we don't take posts down from here unless they've broken one of our community rules. This is because our members spend a lot of time composing replies, and there is a much wider audience that gets a lot out of reading what has been written. It's not fair to ask the community for support, then ask to have it removed once you've read it so others can't also benefit. Use discretion when posting here - think about the level of detail you are sharing, and think also about who might know you are posting here. Also, please keep it clean: this is an all ages forum and explicit discussions about sexual problems are not permitted. Threads and posts of this nature will be removed and your account placed on a moderation hold. 2. What do you want to get out of posting here? Relationship and family issues are stressful. Members sometimes post here seeking advice about a relationship that has broken down, but find themselves getting upset when they don't agree with the response they get. This is a peer support forum, meaning we are not mental health professionals. We are people of all ages and backgrounds, with a wide range of life experiences. While we aim for our discussions to be conducted respectfully, people here will respond with the truth as they see it, from their own experiences and perspectives. We are not here to take sides. Offence is almost never intentional, but it can be sometimes taken. The advice you will see here is not intended to be a substitute for professional counselling. 3. What other support do you have? Most people posting on our forums (about any issue) use this space as a supplement to other supports. This forum is not and cannot be a substitute for offline supports, but it is often a good place to start the ball rolling and find the courage for seeking help. If you are relying solely on an internet forum to resolve your relationship or family issues, you are likely to be disappointed. Check out the Healthy Homes section of our Healthy Families website for further information and resources.

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BC16 Toxic mother
  • replies: 1

Hi, I’ve recently decided to cut my mother out of my life for numerous reasons but mainly mine and my family’s mental health. The thing is I actually haven’t said it to her and now that I’ve blocked her today I’m not sure if I should respond to one o... View more

Hi, I’ve recently decided to cut my mother out of my life for numerous reasons but mainly mine and my family’s mental health. The thing is I actually haven’t said it to her and now that I’ve blocked her today I’m not sure if I should respond to one of her numerous messages. I know whatever I say won’t sink in and she’ll have some excuse but I’m so angry that she spews all these lies and no one has ever pulled her up on it. That she thinks it’s ok to get my ex step father to start calling and texting when he hasn’t acknowledged my existence in 2 years. I’ve been doing better mentally but now I’m angry and I keep snapping at my wife and kids because I’m conflicted.

Dave992 Loosing my relationship with my children's mother to realise I am the problem
  • replies: 1

Hey everyone. Hope you are all having a great weekend. 2 months ago my partner left me saying she had no interest in reconciliation. I was never physically abusing but I've learned that I was distant and un loving of her and the children. I've had de... View more

Hey everyone. Hope you are all having a great weekend. 2 months ago my partner left me saying she had no interest in reconciliation. I was never physically abusing but I've learned that I was distant and un loving of her and the children. I've had depression and ignored the fact thinking that is just how it is. I've made active efforts to change this now but still feel horrible that I have hurt the person I love. I'm wondering how people have dealt with this before in the past.

DisappearMe Part time depression?
  • replies: 3

I am separated with two kids (9 - ADHD and 7 - Autism and ADHD) and have 50/50 custody. The week I have the kids is filled with non-stop fighting, them disrespecting me and each other, and me wishing I could disappear. I can't stand being around them... View more

I am separated with two kids (9 - ADHD and 7 - Autism and ADHD) and have 50/50 custody. The week I have the kids is filled with non-stop fighting, them disrespecting me and each other, and me wishing I could disappear. I can't stand being around them and find myself disengaging (sleeping late, not wanting to play with them) and generally hating my life. We are going through various options to try to get help for their behavioural issues but nothing has changed yet. My ex and I are on OK terms but I find him unhelpful in discussing the issues I have. He says they aren't as bad for him. Today I got caught in the cross fire of my kids throwing things at each other and ended up at the hospital with an injury. No one knows how bad it is with them, they can be rude and badly behaved around others but nothing like what I see daily when they are with me. When I am with my kids I feel like I meet all the criteria for depression and in the days before they come to me I feel anxious as I know what it will be like. Then, as soon as my week is up I feel fine again - happy, optimistic, and calm. I can't live like this and the thought of another 10+ years of this is unbearable, especially as the kids are getting bigger and stronger and more dangerous to each other and me. I don't know what to do.

Keeley23 I'm so goddamn lonely
  • replies: 1

At 15 I was first diagnosed with health issues. Mentally and physically. That was when I first started noticing my friends from highschool not wanting me around as much. There was a group of maybe 7 of us who always hung out and drank together and ha... View more

At 15 I was first diagnosed with health issues. Mentally and physically. That was when I first started noticing my friends from highschool not wanting me around as much. There was a group of maybe 7 of us who always hung out and drank together and hand fun. At 18 I had to move an hour away with family and then I really noticed that they didn't want a bar of me. I would ask them to hang out and they'd say no. I could only hang out with them if they invited me somewhere where it was convenient for them. I always have to travel to meet their needs. Now Im 21 and live 2 hours away with my partner. I don't drink due to having a problem with alcohol and it just makes me realise that they only liked me conditionally. They only liked me if I was there conveniently for them and drank. Now I sit at home, in my bed and I just feel empty. I have no one I can talk to. I have no one to spend my day with and while my partner is amazing it's just not the same as having a friend. I want someone I can message when something good happens. When I feel sad. I just want someone. I feel so goddamn lonely and empty and there's a hole in my chest. I feel close to collapsing in on myself. I'm exhausted by my want and desire and I don't know how to keep up with it

suspicious_banana Anxious Attachment in relationship while also dealing with other issues.
  • replies: 1

Hey guys, I am going through a bit at the moment in my current romantic relationship and my relationship with myself. Some support and advice would be great. A few things to note: - I've been diagnosed in the recent weeks with an anxious attachment s... View more

Hey guys, I am going through a bit at the moment in my current romantic relationship and my relationship with myself. Some support and advice would be great. A few things to note: - I've been diagnosed in the recent weeks with an anxious attachment style due to my mum having bipolar when I was growing up.- I have previously been in an abusive relationship previously, I was cheated on, manipulated, guilt tripped, gaslit and so on during it. I was in this relationship for 2 and a half years.- My partner and I work together.- My partner struggles to bring how how she is feeling and her needs, even when asked.- I've learnt recently that my partner is an independent person The story begins: I (21m) met my partner (21f) two years ago, things were great for a start, spent a lot of time together, affection and connection were through the roof. We had a few problems here and there and were able to somewhat comfortably resolve them. Her and her best friend moved in together and I noticed that her best friend was showing signs of jealousy, it ended up have a big impact on our relationship. Her friend had no one else but my partner to spend time with and my partner was always inviting her friend everywhere that we were wanting to go, then I'd be the third wheel (if that makes sense). Her friend would also make me very uncomfortable, glaring at me, ignoring me, isolating herself whenever I was over at their place. I brought this up with my partner many times and every time, she got very defensive about things and was very open about putting her friends needs above mine while also saying some other nasty things, breaking my trust completely. I ended up breaking things off with her for while as she couldn't have a discussion about it/anything without getting defensive, and then we were able to come back a month later and discuss things. Eventually she came to her senses and they had a falling out, and upon her own reflection, she can now understand how toxic that friendship was and how I was "right".

Drew76- grief and depression
  • replies: 1

Hi all just need some help I have being battling depression for the past 20 years and recently i just lost my best friend my mum after a 2 week battle with Multilobar Pneumonia. Can anyone recommend any types of counselling as I have my first born gr... View more

Hi all just need some help I have being battling depression for the past 20 years and recently i just lost my best friend my mum after a 2 week battle with Multilobar Pneumonia. Can anyone recommend any types of counselling as I have my first born grandson born in july and I want to be in his life but i need to get help first

Tinam Our son was charged with murder
  • replies: 11

Does anyone know of any support groups for parents with criminal children? We can't get ourselves out of this depressed state of bewilderment and need to talk to other parents coping with same issues. Our son was 18 yrs old when he was charged.

Does anyone know of any support groups for parents with criminal children? We can't get ourselves out of this depressed state of bewilderment and need to talk to other parents coping with same issues. Our son was 18 yrs old when he was charged.

failingatthis Spouse constantly blames
  • replies: 6

Hi I don’t know where else to turn, I’ve been in an on again off again relationship for 4 years the last 1.5 years living together we both come from ex husband/wife and have a blended family, my issues come that I’m blamed for everything, my ex wife ... View more

Hi I don’t know where else to turn, I’ve been in an on again off again relationship for 4 years the last 1.5 years living together we both come from ex husband/wife and have a blended family, my issues come that I’m blamed for everything, my ex wife is frustrating difficult to deal with regarding our children and often is changing things to suit herself though we have a court order it can’t stop her find8ng little ways to get around it, this caused a rift between my and my current partner who says I have to stand up to her more though ever time I do it ends up in bitter arguments, with both my e wife and spouse, to the extent my daughter come in an said that she had enough of the constant conflict and the blame that was being placed on me and my daughter and wanted to go home, I took my daughter home that evening as she was in tears and didn’t want to be in that environment, I told her that my spouse was just upset she isn’t that bad of a person, she claims she’s fighting for our life and our family life and that ever time my e wife does something it effects us all which I don’t disagree with. the next morning I was told that my daughter was not welcome in the family home anymore after she yelled at my spouse and called her a liar…I have to admit I did the same thing in anger as she firmly stuck to her versions and just won’t listen to what I have to say. I’ve had to spend every second weekend at my brothers to sleep on a couch just to see my two children, I was told that they could come back if my daughter apologised for her behaviour this was after she packed all her things up in boxes of course my daughter doesn’t want to which is understandable and my son won’t either. I’ve been called a liar, cheat unfaithful dishonest and deceitful and that I never cared about her or her family at all. Don’t get me wrong I’m not perfect but have I truly created this issue, I’m not to blame that my ex wife is difficult she always is and always will be

PsychedelicFur Dealing with unrequited love and confused feelings
  • replies: 13

Hey there, i confessed my feelings for my friend not so long ago. He said he didn’t want to risk being with me, intimately, because he had a fwb relationship long ago and they had a falling out. Anyway, he told me i was pretty, kind and he holds my h... View more

Hey there, i confessed my feelings for my friend not so long ago. He said he didn’t want to risk being with me, intimately, because he had a fwb relationship long ago and they had a falling out. Anyway, he told me i was pretty, kind and he holds my hand and cuddles me. And it makes me feel like there is something there and it really confuses me. i keep comparing myself to the other woman, I knew he was with ages ago. What does she have that I don’t have? Logically, I know this isn’t right. AND IT JUST MAKES ME SO ANGRY!!! I have told him how much I care and love him. And it hurts me he doesn’t want anything more than cuddling and holding hands. And he calls me sexy legs. I don’t know what to do. i wish he could just be with me… what did that other woman have that i don’t have? it makes me compare myself. I hate having unrequited love. I hate feeling so alone and sad. I hate rejection. And i’m so confused. It seems like mixes messages but I’m unsure.

roosters1984 Relationship
  • replies: 3

Hi I am Melissa 38 I have a boyfriend he is 48 his name is Cain and I love him so so much I think I am so so obsessed with him because I call and text him everyday because I have this feeling he’s going to cheat on me but I know he’s not what do I do... View more

Hi I am Melissa 38 I have a boyfriend he is 48 his name is Cain and I love him so so much I think I am so so obsessed with him because I call and text him everyday because I have this feeling he’s going to cheat on me but I know he’s not what do I do please help