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CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi all,

One of the things I love about these forums is that as well as dealing with the heavy stuff there is space to chill out and connect with people in in a social forum. After reading threads from other single parents I noticed that many of us feel alone at times, unsupported, we feel we are not doing a good enough job or we are just plain old worn out or frustrated. I thought I would start this thread for all the single parents out there who just want a space to chill out, relax, maybe compare notes, ask for advice and to pretty much know you are not alone.

It's a tough gig, we are all doing the best we can.

CMF

91 Replies 91

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

CMF what a great thread, a place for us single parents to get and seek advice from other parents in a similar place. We understand how hard it is not to have some one to bounce ideas off. Or have a gripe about the problems we are facing.

About your partner (ahole) if he is not interested in helping raise the child/ children. He shouldn't take credit for any improvement in academic stuff. If the child also takes on pt work as well because the child sees there mates doing it. Both the child and you get the pat on the back. The farther gets nothing. He has done nothing so he gets nothing.

Again great thread.

Kanga Bounce

CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Thanks kanga,

I'm glad you came across it. We all support each other either way but i think it is nice to have really specific threads. I'm loving your 'garden' thread, it is really 'growing'. Gardening is so therapeutic.

Hope you are doing ok. I'm glad you were able to settle your young one.

kanga_brumby
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Knowing the condition I have, treatment and so forth. Plus with my personality I know my daughter I had her laughing before she left. She at least filled me in a bit, some rely personal stuff. She didn't know how I'd take it. Now she knows how I'd take it, and a lot more relaxed about it. Like no matter what she is my daughter, and always will be. It's called unconditional love. You can choose your friends and lovers, family your stuck with. Most of us in our family some where there is a person who is embarrassing.

Hands up if its you. ( mine is up) after all when I was a kid my farther embarrassed us kids. Now the embarrassment continues. In tradition pass it on down the line. My dad always sang All Jolson we kept asking to stop every time there was a family do rellos around Jolson. Then the daddy dancing. With me it's I am going to marry one of the daughters teachers. "No you cant its not on you cannot marry a teacher." ( we aren't interested in each other any way. just baiting the daughter.)

Kanga

cakeboss
Community Member
Hi there im new to this group.I to are a single parent and you dont have time to be unwell do you .I find there is no time for anxiety and depression to set in is there.Ive been told i do a awesome job its the finacial side that i find tough to deal with.my kids are my world and i do have help from my ex ,Its tough finacially the worry can get to you at times.I cant take stress does anyone else feel the same .Im currently seeing a counciler and just wondered if they face this to like me .

CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Kanga, you are a cheeky one saying you'll marry the teacher 😃.

Hi cakeboss and welcome. Thanks for joining this thread. Yes i hear you loud and clear. How old are your kids? Mine will save for things they want alot which helps. It also teaches them the value of things. The worry and anxiety gets to me too at times. Hang in there, we are all doing the best we can with what we have.

Cmf

bluewater
Community Member

Hi everyone,

It certainly is hard at times i was having similar issues as you CMF I had my secondary school kids demand i drove them to and from school or most of the time they wouldn't go my life is spent soley meeting their needs I've got no support from anyone with this matter so that's out of the question. I've explained to the kid's im tired im just so exhausted you'd think they'd want to help out especially the 17 year-old or am I asking to much as he's also got anxiety issues from the same incident as me? but i know what their capable of im just stuck wondering if its my job to still baby my high school kids! yes you can tell im exhausted

CMF
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi bluewater,

welcome and thanks for joining this thread.

I think at high school level we need to step back a little and at 17 yes definitely. Having said that though, i don't know the degree of his anxiety. Is he receiving help for that? My kids now walk, no arguments. If it is really cold or raining i offer to drive them. My son was probably the lazier one but i pointed out that when he wanted to go out with friends he was capable of finding his own way so he could do the same with school. When he is at his dad's and his dad refuses to take him anywhere he makes his own way and it is a lot further too. Overall he is pretty good.

I would say high school is a good time to let go and let them be independent as much as you can, as long as they are safe of course.

cmf

Hi I have 15 and 18 year old. Both at secondary both different schools. Each makes there own way, all year round. They don't want there old man droping them off, heaven forbid. He might want a cuddle good bye. that's so uncool.

Kanga.

bluewater
Community Member

Thanks everyone I so need to let go! I think my main reason is i feel my child who is doing VCE will just drop out if I dont take her and she has even threatened it. Her psychologist has said she is capable of going herself he believes.

I dont want her to fail but know that she's struggling and we are getting some help but it doesn't take away from me being tired ahhhh im just making excuses.

After having 5 kids off to school then going back to work. My mother returned to school. Got years 10 through to 12 knocked off passed the lot. Then went to university again passing. Her brother also went to university and got his doctorate with honers. His pay grade went through the roof. Traveling the world having discussions with people in very high places. So there is hope for your daughter yet bluewater.

Kanga