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Alone, my family hates me

Elizabethvan
Community Member
I've felt depression over my head for more than 10 years. My family hates me... on a constantly my own twin sister said I'm a pathetic loser for feeling sad.. I'm usually a very bubbly person but if she doesn't get her way she mentally abuses me, to the point like now where I'm crying in tears and my mum sides with her because they both wish I never existed for feeling down and how pathetic and immature it is to cry. I'm constantly heartbroken, I have a broken stitch in my eye wish burst open and I tried to ask them for help and said "I hope it gets infected". I'm at a point where I've left my eye because it doesn't seem like I'm important a being or it's easier to just let it be in pain then bother my own family. I feel so alone, I recently broke up with a boyfriend, I have friends but not best friend, not people I'd convide in or randomly message to hang out.. at this stage I have no one, I'm constantly wishing I had a different life because even if I was living on the street if I had a family that actually valued me I'd be content..
2 Replies 2

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi Elizabethvan, welcome again

I dont know how old you are, if you're at school or working??

These factors matter to the reply I'd like to give.

Certainly poking fun at you isnt acceptable however we only get one side of the story here. Sometimes people misinterpret answers people give. In your case for example their answer anout being wrak by crying could be an attempt to toughen you up. It is still not acceptable but their attempt has good intentions.

I was very sensitive when young. Crying a lot. Never be ashamed of that. It isnt a sign of weakness but a sign of emotion.

Try to wait till you are alone with your mum. Ask her to do things with you alone like shopping. Having a twin sister can be crowding your life. If you share a bedroom ask to have your own. Keep a bit of distance from your sister, take up sports and hobbies that you only have an interest in. This will forge your own identity.

I hope you are ok.

Tony WK

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hello Elizabethvan, being a twin myself I can never understand why one twin is favoured and the other ignored or possibly teased, it just doesn't seem to be feasible, but I know that it happens, just as it is with you.
I am much more likely to cry than my twin, but I don't think that should matter if I'm more physically emotional than he is, and it doesn't bother him nor me, and by saying that I don't mean that he hasn't any feelings, of course he does, and very much so.
It seems as though your twin is very dominate and wants to take total control over you, possibly because you have depression.
As Tony has said it would be good to know how old you are, as it does affect how we can reply back to you, but sometimes when a family has only one member who is suffering from depression, they can't understand why, because there doesn't seem to be any reason why, and feel as though they are behaving like this just to draw attention, but depression isn't meant to draw anybody, it's because there real problems you are finding difficult to accept or overcome.
At the moment all you have are acquaintances, because any friends you may have had always seem to leave, simply because they don't know what to say or how they could help you, so they leave you alone and disappear, and perhaps this what happened with your b/friend.
Hope you can get back to us. Geoff.