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Alone At Xmas

Mikkyk
Community Member
G'day Everyone,

Just wondering if anyone else out there is spending Xmas alone?

Partner of 10 years springs on me that she is spending Xmas with her adult son and his gf this year, takes the little money we had and gone.

No prior discussion, no planning, Just up and gone.

I battle with anexity & depression....this has really knocked me for a 6.

8 Replies 8

Aaronsis
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Mikkyk

Gee that is really rough and I can hear how it has thrown you. I am so sorry that you have been excluded from the day's events and that you will be spending Christmas Day on your own.

I am not sure if you are apart of a church or group that does volunteering, as many of these places will be serving lunch for people and that would be a great way to spend your time and ensure you are not alone, but also give back and be apart of the community. Also nursing homes and homes for the elderly too, they always welcome people to come and chat with residents as they are often forgotten at this time.

Is this something that you would have been included in for past Christmases? It is so very strange that she has not invited you or given an explanation as to why you are not going too. None the less there are ways you can do something on the day so that you are not alone, many people will also be experiencing loneliness at this time of year, and also feeling good about what you are doing.

I can hear how this has really hurt you and I am so very sorry Mikkyk, it is great you have reached out here to this supportive and wonderful community and to get some comfort.

Great to chat to you.

Hugs

AS

Hi Mikkyk,

I don't know whether it helps at all but I am also spending Christmas entirely alone. All my family leave about 16,000 km away and my partner is currently spending time with his ex-wife to be 100% sure his separation from her a year ago was the right and fair thing to do. So not the most amazing Christmas. Also, my friend from overseas who was meant to come and visit and who I have prepared for just told me that it's "too stressful". Amazing times... πŸ™‚ But I am trying to see it positively... it is only one of many Christmases, right? And if this one is really terrible, that enhances the opportunities for the next one to be amazing. Because we can make it amazing for ourselves, no matter what.

So I completely understand that you feel unhappy and upset, but I hope you find comfort in knowing that we can all be lonely together. And all of a sudden, we are not lonely anymore. Good times are coming! πŸ™‚ Have a wonderful, merry and joyful Christmas! Someone is thinking of you right now.

Hanna3
Community Member
Christmas can be a tough time for those of us going through problems like yours Mikkyk - family problems or I've got no friends in the town I've moved to... I'm sorry you've had such a sudden thing happen at this time of year... I am hoping that some of us alone here will be able to chat in the BBCafe forum, so you'd be welcome there if you logon at Christmas. Lots of people here are finding Christmas a stressful, lonely or depressing time. I hope your situation improves. There are lots of supportive people here so do keep checking in. Sending best wishes.

Nothappyuni
Community Member

Hi Mikkyk,

you are far from alone.

My wife of 25 years had an affair and I left her and her abuse, but she still reaches out to hurt me at every opportunity. Told me my kids didn't want to see me, then one of my kids says that is rubbish. It does my head in the games being played.

I hope everyone who is alone for Christmas gets through as best they can, I am thinking of you as ae many others, we will be alone, but we are alone together.

Doolhof
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Dear Mikkyk, Nothappy@uni,Hanna3, AussieGal81and all reading this who feel the same,

I am so very sorry for the position you find yourselves in.

It maybe a little late now, but I am wondering if there are any community lunches you may be able to join in with.

I know in times when I was alone for Christmas, I would head to the beach and take my own lunch with me. Inevitably I would find people to chat with, even if it was to say hello and Merry Christmas.

If you are inclined, there will be Christmas services on all over the place. Not sure if just being with people singing Christmas songs will make you feel worse or maybe a little comforted.

This forum will certainly be operating all over Christmas.

Thinking of you all. Wish I had answers and solutions for you.

Kindest regards from Dools

Matchy69
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
I am alone to today.My kids are going to their grandparents with their mother.I spend most of my Christmas alone these days.The way it is.

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Mikkyk and everyone else who is finding being by yourself for what reason maybe something you have dreaded for a long time, and now that it's upon us, the reality seems to set in, but rather than look at what the negative aspects are or if you’re feeling low and not in the mood to celebrate, that's OK, because it's just another day for many people and doesn't mean your life has to be restricted or controlled by this particular day.

Those who are religious, please I'm not saying anything against what your belief is about, I'm only talking aloud.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

quirkywords
Community Champion
Community Champion

MIkkyk

Welcome to the forum, I hope you can see by the lovely responses that you have , that you are not alone and people are supporting you.

I hope you can go somewhere or do something special for yourself today.

If you feel up to it, let us know how your day went.

Quirky